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how old are you? how many gf's have you had? and how often are you using porn to keep you virginity going?
You are brainwashed by the Hollywood industry.
Greater exposure to sexual content, especially explicit media content such as porn as i.e. 8 y/o... WILL make children far more likely to be either willing or desiring to participate in sex and thus these children's "age of onset" of their first sexual intercourse will generally occur earlier than it will be true for other peers in their society.
Don't forget one thing, I'm talking about children of the same generation in the same area of the approximately same social standing, just so you don't pull off an example of children in an impoverished country where their parents will usually arrange a marriage for most children before they reach the age of 20. Such children in those countries will usually abstain from sexual activity until marriage even when they happen to be significantly older and even if they happen to live on their own and achieve full independency (earning their own money, living in an apartment they own by themselves, etc), so it's an obvious example of one's upbringing and especially views upon sex and the effects upon one's desire and willingness to participate in it.
Last edited by nald; 10-06-2014 at 03:20 AM..
Reason: .
I rather be single than be with a jerk. I am not lowering my standards nope. But have thought why you were that long single? As you are still 25. What you mean almost 10 years single? Who will be committing in the age of 15? please be your self, enjoy your young age,,, when the time is right you will find the right person.
^^^This. It's a bit silly to say you've been single for 10 years because for 4 of those, you were still a teenage boy.
As for settling, I think you need to get rid of the idea of a perfect person. You should have an idea of traits that would make a good partner, but beyond that, not be so specific that everyone will fall short. Everyone has quirks and flaws. Everyone.
I've heard mixed responses about this from people I know and will probably hear the same thing here, but what are your thoughts? Me personally, I have been single honestly for about ten years. To me, it seems like I always go for people who I don't have a chance with. Not only when it comes to looks, but I'm also caught between a rock and a hard place. I'd considering myself a goody goody. I don't drink or smoke and I'm a virgin. I enjoy helping people as much as I can. That's also typically what I look for in a female. The one problem is though that those are characteristics that you find in a lot of Christians, which I am not. Every time I come across someone who fits those characteristics and who I also find attractive, whether it be online or in person, they always mention that they are looking for a Christian guy, which I can understand. I always say that maybe I shouldn't worry much about the drinking or smoking. Maybe I shouldn't worry too much about what the girl looks like. 50% of the time, I get told to lower my standards a bit. Te other 50% of the time, I get told to never lower my standards because that one girl will eventually come around. My thoughts are that since I have been single for so long, I might as well wait until I find that perfect girl. So...what are your thoughts? Is there ever a time where you finally need to give in a lower your standards a bit?
Here is my advice....
Smile.
You look like a serial killer in your profile post and if that is how you carry yourself IRL you may just be scaring people. People observe us even if we are unaware of it.
Twenty five is young. The quality of your life is not measured by the number of dates you have or whether your are single or not.
Just practice a positive outlook and for goodness sakes smile.
I don't mean to harsh here, but it's not about lowering your standards in the women you date. It's about elevating the standards in what you expect of yourself. Do those things and you'll be surprised who is attracted to you.
You are brainwashed by the Hollywood industry.
Greater exposure to sexual content, especially explicit media content such as porn as i.e. 8 y/o... WILL make children far more likely to be either willing or desiring to participate in sex and thus these children's "age of onset" of their first sexual intercourse will generally occur earlier than it will be true for other peers in their society.
good attempt at trying to dismiss my opinion, like saying there is no research discussing impact of porn exposure on relationships and masculinity. even anecdotal and personal experience and google indicate otherwise. btw that probably wasn't the best example to use, for various reasons, but i appreciate your effort to discuss the professional literature. Here is something more relevant:
Many reasons cause people stay virgins, but the main factors "may have been [inability] to attract sexual partners or ... little interest in sexual involvement," the authors write.
In other words, they can't get any or don't want any.
Lower cognitive performance, obesity, lower alcohol use, lower parental educational levels, and lack of sexual attraction may have contributed to individuals' sexual inexperience, as well.
"With inability to attract partners, we're inferring that's an opportunity issue. We have the measurement of obesity and the measurement of sexual activity, and in most cases, obese respondents are more likely to be in the inexperienced category. We're hypothesizing it's a reflection," Halpern explained.
like i said, if he is getting his emotional and sexual needs met by porn, perhaps he is foregoing opportunitities to meet real women by diminishing motivation and creating unrealistic expectations. and what i find particularly interesting in OP's situation is that religion is not the motivating factor for "preserving" his lifestyle.
Last edited by Dr. Clean; 10-06-2014 at 11:03 AM..
You look like a serial killer in your profile post and if that is how you carry yourself IRL you may just be scaring people. People observe us even if we are unaware of it.
Twenty five is young. The quality of your life is not measured by the number of dates you have or whether your are single or not.
Just practice a positive outlook and for goodness sakes smile.
The first time I hear that, I am thinking, "They are waiting on marriage." After that, I can only imagine what other levels of "goodness" I'll have to aspire to, and frankly, it's exhausting being around someone like that.
In answer to your last question, no I would not lower my standards. One of the things you mentioned is smoking, absolutely NOT!! I find cigarette smoke disgusting, I don't want it in my clothes, car, etc. Like you, I've also been told I need to lower my standards by certain family members. My response to them is to mind their own business, it's not their life. Now as for finding perfection, I don't think that exists. You just have to decide what you are willing to compromise on.
OP is not even confident enough to reveal his age, like he thinks it shouldn't make a difference if he is a 18 or 40yo virgin. from what i hear, that is an important factor for a woman.
Given the OP username, we'd expect him to be 24/25 yo.
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