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- drug use
- just out of prison
- only looking for a sexual relationship, where as I want to find a husband and be happily married. I dont do one night stands.
- one was so clingy he wanted to get married the very night he met me
- way too young
- not interested in me after I say I won't have more kids
- foreign and can't understand them speak
- one guy is still a friend, but he had no idea what a carbureter was and we just did not speak the same language
- another was loud and obnoxious. Ironically he is friends with my now bf, so we laugh about this now.
- some were very damaged, bitter and still not over their divorce and marriage. I have been divorced a really long time.
I tried Plenty of Fish and since it was free I have zero luck. I went to a meet and greet and most of the people knew each other and the high point of my evening was dancing with this drunk lady. Since free sites tend to have less serious people I decide to try a paid site. I tried match and had not great luck. I went on a few dates with a lady and we got along OK but then she decided your high school boyfriend had come back and she wanted to try again with him. I met another lady who I dated for a few months but given her family history. She was divorced as were both her sisters multiple times, her brother,mother and niece also divorced. I tried to keep an open mind but after going through a divorce myself I figured the odds were not in my favor given how many second marriages end in divorce. Eventually she ended it by telling me there wasn't any "traction" between us. I thought that was an odd thing to say but I realized later she meant attraction. I had a few other dates with other ladies but nothing serious just more like friends. Match was more for serial daters in my experience. I decided to try eHarmony which at the time was faith based. I had tried it years before at my brothers urging (he was a widower and lived in NC and had great results) and had poor results. I only had 5 women correspond with me and I met one for coffee and we had zero in common. She was an avid Kayaker and traveled all over the country with her Kayak. She was more of an athlete and looking for the same. I decided to try eHarmony again since they had a free weekend. I gave it a shot and this time I had hundreds of women contact me. I was writing back and forth and it got to the point where I had my answers on a word document where I cut and pasted to save wear and tear on my fingers. Anyway I had much better luck this time. I met a nice lady and even though it didn't work out at least she was intelligent and interesting and I had a good time and learned something about her city (Toronto). Then one day I began correspondence with a very nice lady not too far away in Canada. We met for a date and even though she was a bit difficult to understand (she was from Colombia) her English was good and we spent 4 hours walking around the mall chatting. We made another date at a restaurant and had a wonderful time. We continued to date and I was afraid to hold her hand for fear of offending her (at the time I was not familiar with Colombian culture). We were getting along so well and I didn't want to scare her off by being too aggressive. I decided to err on the side of caution. Anyway we dated for almost 2 years and got married 100 weeks after we met. I am learning Spanish (or trying to, they talk soooo fast) and embracing the Colombian culture which is delightful. We have taken a few trips to Colombia which I love (the food, the culture, everybody loves to dance,the spectacular natural beauty and most of all the people). I found true love on the internet and I love my wife and I have never been so happy.
That first pic in your profile of you guys ...... you in the wedding dress and the way you guys are holding hands...... it's a moving pic..... got sort of taken back and a little choked up over that pic.
Awesome......
Glad to see it... gives me hope... sometimes you get a little bit burnt out here reading the negativity.....
I think I'm going to take a break from that site. The only time I ever form a relationship was with my then long ago bf (the only one) through then MySpace.com way back in 2006. The relationship ended long ago and I guess I tried online again on POF, hoping I would run into that same luck of once again forming a relationship but nope.
For those that got into a relationship and/or got married that way, I guess it was luck.
I wouldn't call it luck. It's not like it's rare or terribly uncommon for relationships to form by meeting online. It's just a medium like any other. I met all of my significant others online, and dated several that I met on PoF and OKC. OKC was, by far, my favorite.
Location/region plays a big role in the "options" one has. Higher population of singles or singles in the target demographic the more people there are that have the potential to be matches.
If I don't find him at average or slightly above average then I don't talk to him. Some of them were just ugly for my likes and several that were attractive, I had to block as soon as finding out they only wanted hook-ups and were already talking about meeting them at their place, in a hotels and bringing drinks.
I definitely don't want to just settle because that's all I can find. That would be like an ''Oh well, I wanted the red sparkling shoes but it's ok, I'll take the simple, brown shoes''. Nope, it's not ok. As soon as you settle for less, that other stuff is just your fool's consolation and a defense mechanism. Deep down, you're probably not feeling ok anyway.
If you don't want to settle, then you'll have to keep digging dirt before hitting gold.
Even offline, you don't know who's a dirtbag. It's a numbers game.
The more dirtbags you meet, the closer you are to The One.
At least OLD lets you screen some.
As a supplement, if you have an ideal man in mind (say rich and handsome), you should find offline activities those kinds of guys do, and if those activities don't appeal to you, fake it till you make it.
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