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I would take exception to high COL areas. I know in places like NY, DC, LA, SF, it's fairly common to have roommates if you're living in or near the city well past your 20s.
I rent out my 2nd bedroom and the deal is with my roommate (who happens to be a close friend) that if/when my GF decides to move in, he will need to find another place. But then I'm ultimately just trading one roommate in for another. I could afford to live on my own as well, it's just convenient for me to split the cost, and convenient for my friend who has a hard time affording most of the apartments in the metro area.
Well, I live in the most expensive area, based on the graphic image that was posted and maybe because I'm a loner type but I would gag at the thought of having a roommate, makes me shudder thinking about it, I'm mid 40's and I just can't see a guy my age and in my circle of friends/family having a roommate at those ages.
I'm an old lion I guess, but whatever floats people's boats.
Well, I live in the most expensive area, based on the graphic image that was posted and maybe because I'm a loner type but I would gag at the thought of having a roommate, makes me shudder thinking about it, I'm mid 40's and I just can't see a guy my age and in my circle of friends/family having a roommate at those ages.
I'm an old lion I guess, but whatever floats people's boats.
If you can afford it, so be it. Also, I think being in your 40s, there are different expectations than in your 30s. I just think about those shows like Friends or How I Met Your Mother. Those guys were living together as roommates into their 30s in NYC, and moved out only once they got married.
But yeah, some people are just opposed to roommates in general. I feel this way for the most part, but took on my current roommate to help me afford some upgrades to my new place and build up my savings again after dropping a down payment on my condo. I was also helping a friend out who was struggling to afford the rents here. As I said though, once my GF decides she's ready to move in, I will be giving him notice to look for a new place.
Over 35 year old man or woman living with roommates is no problem, but still living at home is a big fat no.
Coming from a woman - women are attracted to men who have some level of ambition and some promise of being successful either currently or at least in the future because no woman wants to live her married life in her mother-in-law's basement. If by 35 years old a guy can't even support himself to the point of living independently of his parents, how is he going to be able to ever afford to support kids?
Even in an expensive city, most adults will live with multiple roommates rather than in mom's basement. Most well-adjusted adults have no interest in living under their parent's roof unless it's a dire emergency. Living with parents after 35 for either gender is a huge sign that that person is more of a child than an adult - and probably always will be.
Do men really not mind? I don't know about that. I mean, so many of them don't even want a female physician to check their prostates. I can't imagine a man being thrilled with worrying about whether his SO's roommates need the bathroom after he has a colon blow from the previous night's chili or something.
I can't imagine someone of either sex feeling entirely comfortable having sex with an SO in that kind of living arrangement, either. Having to worry about whether someone else hears you? At that age? I don't think it all that unreasonable for an adult to cherish the freedom to screw on the couch or eat breakfast in his skivvies. I know one couldn't do that if there are kids around, and at that age many people already have kids. But a kid-free person? Nah. Part of the fun of being kid-free is to indulge in such freedoms.
Interestingly the Chinese, ABCs, certain other Asians around here don't have such a hang up about having to prove oneself by having one's own place. I see single ABCs living with parents until marriage.
An adult would not live with parents, except for a caregiver situation, or with a roommate. Both show that a person can't make it on their own either financially or mentally. Both are red flags.
At 35 it better be owner not renter. I don't care what city it is.
Do men really not mind? I don't know about that. I mean, so many of them don't even want a female physician to check their prostates. I can't imagine a man being thrilled with worrying about whether his SO's roommates need the bathroom after he has a colon blow from the previous night's chili or something.
I can't imagine someone of either sex feeling entirely comfortable having sex with an SO in that kind of living arrangement, either. Having to worry about whether someone else hears you? At that age? I don't think it all that unreasonable for an adult to cherish the freedom to screw on the couch or eat breakfast in his skivvies. I know one couldn't do that if there are kids around, and at that age many people already have kids. But a kid-free person? Nah. Part of the fun of being kid-free is to indulge in such freedoms.
I posted earlier about not wanting to go to woman's house and having to deal with roommates, I might wanna walk around the house with the ol dork hanging out and not worrying about scaring her roommates.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BayAreaHillbilly
White people problems.
Interestingly the Chinese, ABCs, certain other Asians around here don't have such a hang up about having to prove oneself by having one's own place. I see single ABCs living with parents until marriage.
What is old is new.
But hey, it's only money.
Not sure why you felt the need to inject race into this discussion. Must be nice to be a non-white and be able to talk smack. Me, middle aged white guy, can't pull that one off very easily.
Interestingly the Chinese, ABCs, certain other Asians around here don't have such a hang up about having to prove oneself by having one's own place. I see single ABCs living with parents until marriage.
What is old is new.
But hey, it's only money.
No. It's not only money. It is independence and self-sufficiency.
If there is a double-standard, I welcome it. This gives the more "successful" men an advantage.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JasperJade
Do men really not mind? ...
I don't mind in the least. If a woman is still living with her mother, I'd be inclined to regard that as frugality or filial solicitousness, rather than "failure to launch". A sizable number of my dates have been with either women who still live with their mom, or women who rent a room (and it's literally a room) from a matron-like landlady. These were women around 40, and child-free. Another, at age 47, went through a divorce, and moved in with her 80-year-old mother. In fact I've observed that it's the single-moms who are more likely to have their own domicile, while the child-free tend to either remain dependent on parents or on a gracious and accommodating landlady.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JasperJade
I can't imagine someone of either sex feeling entirely comfortable having sex with an SO in that kind of living arrangement, either. ... Nah. Part of the fun of being kid-free is to indulge in such freedoms.
If/when the relationship becomes intimate, there's always my place... where the indulgence in freedom isn't bounded by privacy-concerns.
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