Ghosting vs. Thanks but No Thanks (girlfriends, older, boys, intimidation)
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I was just hearing of it on this forum. otherwise I always knew it as blowing someone off. lol Or cutting someone out.
Blowing someone off or flaking are pretty common terms, at least for my generation. LOL... Ghosting just sounds sorta silly, but at the end of the day it's still a rude thing to do even though I wouldn't mind if a woman I barely knew "ghosted" me, I figure if I reach out a couple of times with no answer, I got my answer. I don't have to hear the "it's not you, it's me speech" LOL. A real long term relationship, of course a face to face dumping is in order. Some people weasel out and try and do that via text or email, talk about cowardly. LOL.
Blowing someone off or flaking are pretty common terms, at least for my generation. LOL... Ghosting just sounds sorta silly, but at the end of the day it's still a rude thing to do even though I wouldn't mind if a woman I barely knew "ghosted" me, I figure if I reach out a couple of times with no answer, I got my answer. I don't have to hear the "it's not you, it's me speech" LOL. A real long term relationship, of course a face to face dumping is in order. Some people weasel out and try and do that via text or email, talk about cowardly. LOL.
Yeah, for people I barely meet, I don't know well enough to care whether or not they fall off the face of the planet. I have a life long before that person. However, if it is someone whom I have known for years and we had more or less a solid relationship, then I would be devastated if she has suddenly cut me off or "ghosted" me.
Blowing someone off or flaking are pretty common terms, at least for my generation. LOL... Ghosting just sounds sorta silly, but at the end of the day it's still a rude thing to do even though I wouldn't mind if a woman I barely knew "ghosted" me, I figure if I reach out a couple of times with no answer, I got my answer. I don't have to hear the "it's not you, it's me speech" LOL. A real long term relationship, of course a face to face dumping is in order. Some people weasel out and try and do that via text or email, talk about cowardly. LOL.
I had never heard the term "flaking" either. Both "ghosting" and "flaking" are new to me, via this forum, and they both sound stupid to me. I don't use either one. I've been stood up before, though.
Now I have heard "flake"...as in "Man she is a FLAKE!" Meaning - "DITZ" or something similar. Or something like "He is so flakey!" - (he can't make up his mind, or wishy washy). Used as an adjective or noun, is normal usage to me. But never have heard either used as a verb.
Last edited by ChessieMom; 08-08-2016 at 08:08 PM..
Blowing someone off or flaking are pretty common terms, at least for my generation. LOL... Ghosting just sounds sorta silly, but at the end of the day it's still a rude thing to do even though I wouldn't mind if a woman I barely knew "ghosted" me, I figure if I reach out a couple of times with no answer, I got my answer. I don't have to hear the "it's not you, it's me speech" LOL. A real long term relationship, of course a face to face dumping is in order. Some people weasel out and try and do that via text or email, talk about cowardly. LOL.
Agreed. I don't think it's too big a deal in the just dating stage, or for casual acquaintances. After all, how well do you know the person then. lol Now, if it was an actual relationship, that's another matter.
It happens all the time online for example. You can be having a conversation with someone anywhere, and it's a nice covo. But then when you reply, you just don't get an answer back. So, I know the other party was through with the convo. I don't need to bombard them with messages asking where they are lol Or for them to tell me "Go away and leave me alone now." Their lack of response tells me everything. I can take that hint.
I had never heard the term "flaking" either. Both "ghosting" and "flaking" are new to me, via this forum, and they both sound stupid to me. I don't use either one. I've been stood up before, though.
Stood up is an old standard.
I think that the term ghosting is probably part of or came from the hip hop culture, if'ing I were to guess. IDK.
How ever you wanna sugar coat it, at the end of the day YOU weren't good enough for them. YOU are less than. LOL.
I do get what you mean though, but no one if they really are open and intellectually honest doesn't like to be thought of as not good enough for someone. I mean no one is losing sleep over it, just sayin. I know we have to be mature and accept that we're not everyone's cup of tea, but rejection is still rejection at the end of the day.
True, nobody wants to be rejected, but it is most often not about "not being good enough."
It is just not a match!
Guys get mixed messages about these things. They're told to respect her when she says no, but in the next breath are told that she's playing hard-to-get and that he should prove himself by continuing to pursue her. What's more, some guys have gotten the girl that way. Be that as it may, I'd be done once I got an unequivocal no. If I'm mistaken about her playing hard-to-get and pursue her anyway, it's harassment. If I'm asking her out, it's because I think developing a relationship might be of mutual benefit to us. Risking harassment is the opposite of that.
Guys get mixed messages about these things. They're told to respect her when she says no, but in the next breath are told that she's playing hard-to-get and that he should prove himself by continuing to pursue her. What's more, some guys have gotten the girl that way. Be that as it may, I'd be done once I got an unequivocal no. If I'm mistaken about her playing hard-to-get and pursue her anyway, it's harassment. If I'm asking her out, it's because I think developing a relationship might be of mutual benefit to us. Risking harassment is the opposite of that.
A woman saying that she's not feeling it and doesn't think you are a good match for her isn't playing hard to get.
Not by a long shot.
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