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I'm chuckling reading this, because I met and began dating my now husband while we were in college. Neither one of us had much more than a couple of dimes to rub together, so our early dates consisted of taking walks around campus between classes or hanging out in the Student Union. If we were lucky, we were able to take advantage of a free concert. When one of us was feeling flush, we went to the dollar matinee and shared a popcorn. Our first real dinner date involved a proposal. True story.
This. I don't know why the college guys and recent college grads who insist that it takes money to date don't get this.
Good grief. Call it whatever you want. Clearly there are a lot of people that don't use the term "date" unless its someone they have met and decided that they wish to go out on a date with. If it's a setup, then it's a blind date. If it's a first meeting, it's just exactly that. It can certainly "morph" into something more.
Really not neccecesary to get all excited about it.
Providing traditional definitions is all, call it whatever else you would like.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RbccL
Providing traditional definitions is all, call it whatever else you would like.
If I meet someone at a concert and we end up making out, going home, whatever... and decide to see each other again, was that concert we met at our first date in your opinion?
Or was the time where we knew we liked each other or were attracted to each other and made plans to see one another the first date?
This forum is the only place I've ever seen or heard the term "meet and greet" used to describe a date that is somehow not a "real date" because it doesn't involve dinner. I can't imagine anyone using that term in real life.
In my dating/social circles (which have spanned various ages, races, socioeconomic classes, and continents, among other things) it has always been considered "a date" when two people who have romantic interest (or potential romantic interest) toward each other go out and do something together. It doesn't really matter where they go or what they do.
People were going on dates that didn't involve dinner when I started dating in the late 80's, and I assume they did long before that, too. This is yet another case of the media trying to pretend something as old as humanity is somehow new.
The "meet & greet" concept relates mainly to online dating, where the coffee date is for the purpose of finding out whether the online photo accurately represents the live human, or whether it was taken 15 years and 50 lbs. prior, and to determine whether the person was faking his personality online and is, in fact, someone scary or depressed, or whether s/he is the real deal. That's why some don't consider it a "real" date. It's more like a verification exercise, lol. Like passing through security at the airport, LOLOL!
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 01-03-2017 at 12:32 PM..
It was a rhetorical question. My point is that it doesn't matter how I met someone by the time I'm going out with them. This is just how it works in real life, in my experience, but apparently others have had different experiences. I'm just happy no one I date refers to our dates as "not real" or "meet and greets".
Exactly. That's IRL dating ("in real life"), where you date because you met them in some context, and decided you wanted to get to know them better, vs. picking a face out of a catalogue, and meeting up with a complete stranger who may have misrepresented him/herself online.
Brave new world! First of all, I'm old - small "o", not OLD - being as how I'm 70. Never once in my dating experience do I recall asking someone out I hadn't known and gotten to know for awhile. Why would I? Therefore, a dinner date for our first time going out seemed appropriate.
There were several advantages. It gave time to talk and get to know one another better. It was a pleasant and non-threatening interlude. It provided me with a way to gauge their social skills. Did they automatically order the most expensive item on the menu just because they felt they could? Were they conversant? Were they pleasant with and polite to wait staff. Did they have good table manners or did they bolt their food, keep their elbows on the table, chew with their mouths open, crouch over their plate, talk with food in their mouth, clutch their silverware in their fist, slurp their food...you get the idea. Any one of those would have ensured there were no further dates.
I wanted to date ladies with a decent upbringing and appropriate deportment. Guess that was my mother's influence and upper-crust, New York upbringing rubbing off on me and if she hadn't died 28 years ago I would thank her again for it.
I hate to think that the death of dinner dates is a reality. I still have them only now, they're with my wife of 20 years and, yes, our first date included both brunch on the beach and dinner.
This thread is getting really funny! Curmy, in the old days, the measure of an upper-crust date was whether or not they knew how to eat an artichoke. You could forego all the bolded, and simply serve an artichoke as an appetizer, and see if they knew what to do with it. lol I can't imagine putting up with any of that stuff you list. gah!
If I meet someone at a concert and we end up making out, going home, whatever... and decide to see each other again, was that concert we met at our first date in your opinion?
Or was the time where we knew we liked each other or were attracted to each other and made plans to see one another the first date?
I'm curious.
Yeah, I'd recall the concert as our first date. Must've at least ended that way for you, I hope you weren't making out with someone before you knew you liked them. If you wanted to make plans for another day as well, that would be the second date. IMO.
I would call neither of the 2 events a meet and greet, or a meeting. I actually never even use the term 'date', I say I'm going out to dinner/have a drink/Las Vegas, with my friend, see ya later.
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