Trying to get back 4 year relationship. (dating, marriage, women, attracted)
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I had read that it was a good way to get an ex back. I read that if you go no contact and then they see that you are happy and moved on they will come back so that what I was trying to do. I haven't moved on though and I don't know if I ever will. he was my only friend and now I have no one but family. I just needed to be able to talk to him again. I regret it now too. I regret this whole thing. I wish I had just stood up to my parents and saw him like a real couple. I wish I had never broken up with him. He even said that had I done those things we would still be together because of how much love was there. We were supposed to be forever. We had already planned our wedding and everything. We already had names picked out for our children. I just want him back so much, I want a new relationship with him the way things should have been and should be. I just want a second chance, everyone deserves at least a second chance. I know that we could and would work if we gave in another try. Our only issue was not seeing each other, that's all we ever fought about.
Guess you have learned a few things, eh?
Don't lie
Don't sneak around
Don't act impulsively
Don't manipulate other people.
(Although I daresay you should have learned those things as a small child.)
Is there a reason you are a sophomore in college and haven't made a single friend?
That is where you should be focusing your energies.
P.S. No one "deserves" a second chance. Where did you get THAT from? Some chick flick?
I had read that it was a good way to get an ex back. I read that if you go no contact and then they see that you are happy and moved on they will come back so that what I was trying to do.
That's playing games. Don't operate that way. You don't want to be with someone you have to trick into liking you.
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Originally Posted by Countryangel707
I haven't moved on though and I don't know if I ever will.
You will. I promise.
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Originally Posted by Countryangel707
he was my only friend and now I have no one but family.
Family is good. Family is great right now because you are about to move away from your family, so you should spend as much time with them as you can.
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Originally Posted by Countryangel707
I just needed to be able to talk to him again.
That's where that self-control thing I mentioned earlier comes in. He's not in love with you. He's just a habit that you have to break.
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Originally Posted by Countryangel707
I regret it now too. I regret this whole thing.
Remember that regret when you think about contacting him again. Don't talk yourself into doing something else stupid.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Countryangel707
I wish I had just stood up to my parents and saw him like a real couple. I wish I had never broken up with him. He even said that had I done those things we would still be together because of how much love was there. We were supposed to be forever. We had already planned our wedding and everything. We already had names picked out for our children. I just want him back so much, I want a new relationship with him the way things should have been and should be. I just want a second chance, everyone deserves at least a second chance. I know that we could and would work if we gave in another try. Our only issue was not seeing each other, that's all we ever fought about.
You were not in love. You were fantasizing. You have tons of time and will have plenty of chances for all of that ^^^ with a man who actually loves you and cares about you - later, when you've matured.
You still have a TON of growing up to do. Let yourself do it.
So with all the lessons learned, is it possible that when he starts seeing me on a regular basis in the fall and sees that I've changed and do want to hang out that his feelings will gradually come back? He used to tell me how I was everything he wanted in a woman then I fell in depression and changed quite a bit. Im gonna try to not contact him till the fall so 5 months. Then catch up like he said and become friends again and then sit him down and talk to him.
So with all the lessons learned, is it possible that when he starts seeing me on a regular basis in the fall and sees that I've changed and do want to hang out that his feelings will gradually come back? He used to tell me how I was everything he wanted in a woman then I fell in depression and changed quite a bit. Im gonna try to not contact him till the fall so 5 months. Then catch up like he said and become friends again and then sit him down and talk to him.
She'll figure it out eventually. It's going to take time for logic to take hold of her heart. That's what makes giving advice to people who are "in love" so frustrating.
She'll figure it out eventually. It's going to take time for logic to take hold of her heart. That's what makes giving advice to people who are "in love" so frustrating.
Lol
You're right.
It's just hard to lay it all out there and have the response always be, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, ok, but if I do all that will he want me back?"
I just don't understand why that wouldn't work though. Wouldn't it be the same as first meeting?
No. Of course not.
Some lessons have to be learned the hard way, I guess. But we've already told you what you SHOULD do.
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