Finding love after 40? (attractiveness, couple, personal, physically)
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I think this largely depends on where you live. In large metro areas I've found it to be quite common to find single attractive women in their 30's and 40's who don't have children. Also, since the OP is still in his 30's (for now), it's not unrealistic that he could also date women in their mid-to-late 20's if he wanted to. Furthermore, since the OP is, himself, divorced with kids, he may not be opposed to dating women who also have kids. When you combine all of these options, I don't really see age as a limitation for him. Personally, I have found dating to be far easier as a relatively established and stable man in my 30's and 40's than it was as a clueless, rudderless 20-something.
It's true for you because you're in Oklahoma City. I got the hell out of Oklahoma in my early 30's largely for that very reason. In the north or on the coasts and/or in major metro areas it's a whole different ballgame with way more options for dating as an adult.
Seems to me , when the time comes , realisticly , a woman with children would be ideal . I would think most women who don't have children , will want them . I think I'm done having kids myself .
Plus having kids puts you into a whole lifestyle change . I think I would be looked at as having bagage , or that too much of my time is taken up with kids and not putting the woman first and foremost would create jealously?
Seems to me , when the time comes , realisticly , a woman with children would be ideal . I would think most women who don't have children , will want them . I think I'm done having kids myself .
Plus having kids puts you into a whole lifestyle change . I think I would be looked at as having bagage , or that too much of my time is taken up with kids and not putting the woman first and foremost would create jealously?
I could be wrong ....
As you heal and are able to get back to 'normal' (although normal is subjective) and ready to start dating again, you will figure out what you want and what you don't want. Just take your time and don't rush into anything.
There are women who wont mind at all that you have children and yes, they may have children of their own. As long as there is communication about what each others needs are and understanding about the things that come along with having children, it can work out.
Really sorry to hear about your situation. Really is awful. I do think that there will be a good amount of single women out there for ya. Statistically speaking a large amount of them will be divorced with kids. If that's not a problem you should be good.
I'm 40 and happily single - always have been. My advice is that after 20 years of being a couple, don't rush into dating. Get to know yourself again and focus on who you are. Are you happy with that person? If the answer is yes, well great. Then you'll have no problem being alone with yourself. If the answer is no, then it's time to focus on some self-improvement.
Also, your kids have been thrown for a big loop. I think devoting yourself to them and their wellbeing right now would be the best idea. I'm 40 and just realized my mother was gaslighting me my entire life - it's been a kick in the gut that is making me re-evaluate everything. Your kids had almost the same lesson 20 some years before I did, and I can't imagine how much harder that must be for them.
Build your a social life apart from your kids, but build one with them too. Do things with other families. Give them a community to help support them at this crucial and painful time. They've suffered the worst rejection a child can suffer.
I'm 40 and happily single - always have been. My advice is that after 20 years of being a couple, don't rush into dating.
I wouldn't necessarily say you need to avoid dating-- unless you're at that point where you're so jaded that you're disgusted with all members of the opposite sex, in which case, yes, you should avoid dating. Otherwise, you should avoid rushing into a relationship, but just dating can be a good way to meet people, maybe get a confidence boost, learn about yourself and others, and avoid sitting around feeling sorry for yourself. Nothing wrong with dating, as long as you're honest with the people you date about about where you are with things.
Why is 40 seen as the age at which people think life as they know it is over? It seems like a great age to me. Not too young, definitely not old.
There are plenty of 40 somethings out there looking for love.
Where are those? Im 48, no kids, economically Independent, i can have my retirement and relocate when i want, Healthy, physically regular (With discreet overweight) and I'm more alone than number one.
Where are those? Im 48, no kids, economically Independent, i can have my retirement and relocate when i want, Healthy, physically regular (With discreet overweight) and I'm more alone than number one.
They are not in your grocers freezer. They are not hanging around anywhere you can see them. Over 40 you must go online if you want to meet someone decent in what is left of your good years. And forget free sites. A woman looking for quality men is wasting her time on free sites. I've yet to find the woman willing to pay anything to join a dating site,however. But... it isn't necessary. There is never a charge to create a profile and upload it to the site. Do that. Sit back and let the men come to you. Men that have made a $30/mo.financial commitment will be more serious than the jokers on Craigslist. Be careful what you wish for.
They are not in your grocers freezer. They are not hanging around anywhere you can see them. Over 40 you must go online if you want to meet someone decent in what is left of your good years. And forget free sites. A woman looking for quality men is wasting her time on free sites. I've yet to find the woman willing to pay anything to join a dating site,however. But... it isn't necessary. There is never a charge to create a profile and upload it to the site. Do that. Sit back and let the men come to you. Men that have made a $30/mo.financial commitment will be more serious than the jokers on Craigslist. Be careful what you wish for.
Wich pay dating sites do you advice?
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