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Advice already given at least twice in her other 12 threads. OP isn't gonna wait, she wants a partner sooner, and the kids are too young to wait on -youngest being not older than 7 I think.
We can't know the true answer to your very interesting question.
But what intrigues me is that I wonder if your first paragraph and last paragraph are linked. I know it's popular to advise to choose to be happy. But unhappiness is a major part of life, whether it's in our own lives or what we see in the world. So you have me wondering whether your determination to be happy leads to you develop a very narrow view of life, and a very narrow path of what you'll accept from others. Personally, I don't think it's a good way to live.
Of course it's possible that someone seeking a relationship won't find one. But I wish you'd polled your exes more specifically. It would be interesting to find out if you're uncompromising in terms of what you demand from them, or in terms of a rigid moral view, or in terms of being a stick-in-the-mud about habits, or what. If you're uncompromising about your personal honesty, for instance, that's a good trait. But if you're uncompromising about demanding that the man pay for everything in a relationship, or in terms of meals eaten on a rigid schedule, or in terms of having extreme political ideas - that's not so good.
Borrowed money from your parents you haven't paid back. Have a house you tried to flip unsuccessfully that's a burden. You don't make much money, you are always in the other sections trying to learn how to improve your financial situation.
You let guys sleep (live on your couch) that you are trying to get together with, your daughter is in counseling (which is good)......
You had an ex actively trying to kill you...
You always complain about all the work your house needs and having to do drywall yourself and such, and you want a guy to do that stuff for you.
No one likes your cooking....
That's having your life together? Your perspective is unique.
Yeah, she's a real catch, this one. I remember she once blessed us with a thread about how forlorn she was over not being able to wake up next to whoever the guy of the week was at the time.
I can't get over the fact that you won't consider dating a man with children, yet expect a childless man to be thrilled to date a mother of two? I was happy I met someone with a child, we do a lot of stuff as a family of 4, but we also get plenty of adult only time as well. Only another parent can truly appreciate and understand the demands and time commitments of raising children.
Totally agree. What's one more kid to add to the mix? And he might not have custody except on weekends, if that is your issue. You need the understanding that another parent can give you in terms of the time and attention kids require. A single guy with no kids will get that.
If your current "dealbreakers" don't leave any prospects then you need to re-examine what you will and won't deal with! What made sense 20, 10, or 5 years ago may not make sense considering your current situation.
If your current "dealbreakers" don't leave any prospects then you need to re-examine what you will and won't deal with! What made sense 20, 10, or 5 years ago may not make sense considering your current situation.
I quit taking her seriously when she mentioned she wasn't interested in sex, and the deal-breaker of: He can't have a degree in Liberal Arts (or some other degree that she didn't think had enough potential.) wut
I quit taking her seriously when she mentioned she wasn't interested in sex, and the deal-breaker of: He can't have a degree in Liberal Arts (or some other degree that she didn't think had enough potential.) wut
I don't think she realizes how low her value has gotten in the dating world. Single mom, multiple dads, nearing 40.
I'm 50 without kids, I even know my dating value has gone down from the time I was a 21yr old lol
I don't think she realizes how low her value has gotten in the dating world. Single mom, multiple dads, nearing 40.
I'm 50 without kids, I even know my dating value has gone down from the time I was a 21yr old lol
This whole "dating value" thing is such nonsense. (That's the polite word for it.) I guess it never occurred to you that your dating value could be quite high for women in your age range?
Dating value has nothing to do with age,and everything to do with your personality and attitude. I know 70 year olds that have a date for every night of the week....then theres people like the OP.
I tried dating men with kids. That was a disaster. No thank you.
We were on the couch, so not a date. Not going out to a movie. I can not play on my phone, but I fall asleep if I am not engaged. I suddenly become tired when I am bored. No matter what I do I can't help this. I slept through a kids movie last weekend that I paid $50 to go see...ugh.
But, dating men without kids has been a disaster, too
One pattern I have noticed is that you tend to fast-track relationships. That's fine when you're kid-free and it's not hurting anyone else, but it's way too delicate a situation when kids are involved. Boundaries and all that.
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