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How many parents actually discuss pornography with their children..., not just birds and bees? How about pornagraphy that depicts women in a degrading even violent manner vs plain sexual fantasy? How many will buy condoms for their children who are suspected of being sexually active? Did you? Would you? How about talk about intimacy, love, and infatuation? Do not think so....
Nah... these days parents are leaving or hoping that someone else will do the hard work... typical teachers and schools who take the brunt of the blame. One of the biggest complaints from educators (wife is an educator) is getting parents to take responsibility and be engaged with the child . How can one possibly expect to introduce such challenging topics to a child in a healthy manner if we cannot get them to even be involved in regular daily parenting?
If most parents thought that way and even put in a little effort.... we would be better off as a society... even if for some, it doesnt always happen.
My point is porn, in this context is a scapegoat... no more no less.
I'm frankly surprised that with all you have shared here and expected us to respect about YOUR lifestyle and choices that you would just write an assumption like this ^^^.
You have no idea how I've approached this topic with my kids, and you sound exactly like a parent who hasn't actually dealt with the problem personally.
We all are doing the best that we can with what we know at the time, and yes, parents have differing approaches. What I have learned as a parent of three boys, one of whom I discussed porn with LAST NIGHT, is that it is an ongoing conversation, and the research findings are ongoing as well.
"Parental responsibility" is not a cure-all answer for every question, and as a parent of young kids I'm sure you know by now that even the most vigilant parent can't control their child's every action. Sometimes a problem IS an actual problem, the prevalence of which can signal a need for a different kind of parental approach.
There are things in life you as a parent have zero control over.
Part of parenting is accepting these things to allow your children to grow and learn on their own.
Part of this is also learning when and when not to interject and attempt to correct.
Where do these lines get drawn?
This answer is going to be different for everyone. The variables involved here will never lead to a catch all answer for every event.
Yeah, that's pretty much the mantra for parenting ... although somehow we do mostly end up coming around to some of the same general standards.
"General standard" would be respecting societal standards. Which, are never constant in themselves and change depending on which societal structure you may be living within.
I would dispute both of these generalizations. Both are fairly cliche.
Generalizations on purpose.... there is still a certain amount of truth to it albeit generalizations. We are talking about generalizations here. The OP's linked article included.
You have no idea how I've approached this topic with my kids, and you sound exactly like a parent who hasn't actually dealt with the problem personally.
I was responding to a post that started out with "Most parents.." As such, not you specifically (prob could have worded it more clearly). Simply thinking about this topic already puts you ahead of the curve to begin with. The fact that you discussed porn with your child IMO puts you way ahead of the game.
Actually... my 10 year old has already mentioned that it came up with his circle of friends. Which prompted us to have the 1st talk with him. So while I don't consider myself an expert, I am making decisions along the way.. like many parents do. My wife is trained in child development and works in schools, so I am leaning on her to help make those decisions. Wife asked that we wait a little while before directly discussing pornography with him. I initially disagreed (I wanted to bring it up sooner) but I trust her judgement.. so we wait.
Yes.. no matter what, parents cannot completely control your children. I know that.... it goes without mention.
You responded to MY post, so yes, it seemed directed at me.
Apologies.. However, I still would disagree with "Most parents.." assessment. I find more often than not parents avoiding...
Quote:
Yeah, it comes up so much sooner than you THINK it will as a parent, and then you think back to things you did and when you did them ...
My brother and I are 14 years apart. My parents absolutely say that things seem "accelerated" or more complex when it comes to raising a child. It is not our imagination.... I have 3 boys as well... My hope is that they grow up to respect people in general.
Apologies.. However, I still would disagree with "Most parents.." assessment. I find more often than not parents avoiding...
It's all good.
As usual, I could have followed my own rule and written, "Most parents I know ..."
Quote:
Originally Posted by usayit
My brother and I are 14 years apart. My parents absolutely say that things seem "accelerated" or more complex when it comes to raising a child. It is not our imagination.... I have 3 boys as well...
I'm still looking for that kid instruction manual...
I'm still looking for that kid instruction manual...
If you find it, send it my way.... Apparently, my kids' sleep and mute buttons are hidden somewhere. That roll of duct tape looks promising at times.. (joking of course).
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