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So I've been seeing this girl for about 3 months now, and while I do truly enjoy my time with her, there are a couple of things that concern me.
First and foremost, she is a recently divorced single mom with two very energetic kids. About 2 months prior, she quit her admin-type job because she did not like the office politics and work environment. I initially questioned that decision as she has 2 kids to support as well as a mortgage payment with little to no savings. Well 2 months later she is still unemployed and while I know that finding a job without a degree can be a challenge, I don't think she is looking hard enough. I'll text her during the day and apparently she is just hanging around the house doing different odds and ends but not really job searching. I told her to consider taking a temp position so that we she can work her way into something and have cash in her pocket, but she says that is not an option for her.
Long story short is that she's about to lose her house and can't even afford to put gas in her tank. Her family supports her atleast where the kids are concerned, but it's somewhat frustrating because I'm the one that always has to pay for dates and it's kinda tough to tell people that you are dating an unemployed single mother.
Should I be patient or consider leaving the relationship? Your thoughts?
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Are you seriously asking? To me, this is an obvious "run the crap away" situation. While I'm pretty sure your post is not even sincere (either that or you're in complete denial), there are so many red flags they are impossible to ignore. You don't mention the sex, but it must be pretty damn good for you to even consider staying in that relationship.
I agree with Robert. There are kinds of red flags. I am all for dating a single mom (I am dating one myself), but my girlfriend has her act together. She is set financially, works, is tight with her money (I have observed things such as the temp she keeps in her house, doesn't waste food, and even what she gives her kids for Christmas gifts). Finances are one of the biggest things that cause relationships to not work and yours has warning signs all over it.
Part of me wants to give her the opportunity to find a job and piece her life back together. Perhaps I give it another month or so and if things don't change for the better than leave.
I mean for the most part I do have fun when I'm around her. She's a "cheap date" and does not expect much so she's always grateful and appreciative with whatever I give her. I honestly could take her to Burger King and she would think that would be an amazing time spent with me.
She must not be too bright, if she has two kids and quit her job without having another one lined up. Why would you be attracted to a person like this? Run.
Long story short is that she's about to lose her house and can't even afford to put gas in her tank. Her family supports her atleast where the kids are concerned, but it's somewhat frustrating because I'm the one that always has to pay for dates and it's kinda tough to tell people that you are dating an unemployed single mother.
What a strange story of unanswered questions. If you’ve been seeing her exclusively for 3 months, haven’t you ever asked her what she plans on doing when she loses her house? How is she paying for electricity or groceries if she doesn’t even have money for gas? Why would you have to go around telling people you’re dating someone who’s unemployed?
Are you using her for sex because she’s a “cheap date”? That would be the embarrassing part. She’s someone’s mom for chrissakes.
Unfortunately, it's nearly impossible these days to find a job that doesn't require a degree yet does support a mortgage payment and the needs of two children. It's very difficult to work full time and be a single parent and maintain a household and manage day care. I think it's impossibly unfair.
If you really like her I would cut her some slack on dating experience costs. Those maybe her only times to momentarily escape her mounting troubles.
Even if she got a job, she likely will still have to move out of her home, given her earnings potential. I suspect she is just going through motions to get her head right. Sometimes that process includes a little sulking or low energy. But it's your life too, so you have to do what you feel is in your best interest as well. Good luck.
What a strange story of unanswered questions. If you’ve been seeing her exclusively for 3 months, haven’t you ever asked her what she plans on doing when she loses her house? How is she paying for electricity or groceries if she doesn’t even have money for gas? Why would you have to go around telling people you’re dating someone who’s unemployed?
Are you using her for sex because she’s a “cheap date”? That would be the embarrassing part. She’s someone’s mom for chrissakes.
I agree. It's as if he's just a spectator to her life rather than part of it.
What a strange story of unanswered questions. If you’ve been seeing her exclusively for 3 months, haven’t you ever asked her what she plans on doing when she loses her house? How is she paying for electricity or groceries if she doesn’t even have money for gas? Why would you have to go around telling people you’re dating someone who’s unemployed?
Are you using her for sex because she’s a “cheap date”? That would be the embarrassing part. She’s someone’s mom for chrissakes.
If I can play devils advocate for a second. One of the first things people ask about someone new is : What do you? So if you mention to a family member or friend that you're dating someone new, they will nearly surely ask: What does she/he do?
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