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Did you gain weight?
Do you have more bummy days?
Do you look a lot different?
Do you act a lot different?
Maybe he hates the skanky stuff and just never told you.
Mine hates lipstick and sluttly clothes.
He's grabby over chapstick, cotton and a tshirt.
(Which...ok..whatever...less work for me)
I dunno..something is off with your guy.
I mean..does it work when you actually try?
Or is it flacid city?
Does mental illness run in the family for him?
I really think myself its a gay or cheat thing.
A lot of guys are bi too and that confuses them.
My boyfriend and I have been together for four years now, and in the beginning, we had sex all the time, which was perfect! Now, four years later, my boyfriend seems to never want it, acts like its a hassle, and will make excuses to not have sex! I feel completely rejected, unattractive, and insanely frustrated. If it were up to me, we'd be going at it at least twice a day. We're young(22) and I love him more than anything, I just can't see myself leaving the man I'd like to marry over...sex. Then again, I can't give it up for good, and I know it will only get worse!! I know some men in my position would have already cheated if their women acted this way, and I don't want to do that to him. i just want his sex. Any ideas?
It's what I describe as one's libido taking a vacation. Sorry can't give no advice
I'm not going to say that it is impossible but I would think that at 22 it is pretty young for a man to lose his sex drive or desire for sex. I'd seriously consider that there is some other underlying problem for his lack of interest.
You say his job is not stressful but he works weird and long hours, could it be that while not stressful, he is very tired due to the irregular long hours he works? You also say that you seriously doubt he is cheating on you because of the hours he works, I'll give you that because guess you would know that best, though to be honest with you it was the first thought that I had, however, giving that he is not physically cheating on you, is there a possibility that there is an emotional or psychological cheating that could be taking place with someone at work maybe? Or another possibility and cause of lack of interest in sex at home with a partner that I have personally heard of is an addiction to pornography where it sort of replaces the intimacy between the couple.
You also say that there are some financial stresses but you don't attribute these to the problem because it existed prior to the financial problems, how about other things? Could he possibly be depressed, unfulfilled in his career or feeling like he is sacrificing a goal or dream that he may have for his life? All these things could affect a person's sex drive, male or female.
How is he otherwise, with regard to your relationship in general. Is he the same way as usual in other area's.. affection and spending time together, being romantic or what not? Or can you see patterns of a potential problem manifesting in other area's as well.
It's good that you talk to him honestly about this and that you have honest and open communication with each other. What does he tell you is the problem as he see's it? Or does he simply not see a problem?
Another possibility... prior to it becoming a matter of not having sex, was he struggling in this area in some way, i.e. perhaps a medical condition. I know he is young and it would seem unlikely but maybe. You say he is doctor stubborn, but the reality is that while yes sex is not the most important aspect in a relationship, it is an important one and it is obviously affecting you, which in turn can and will no doubt affect your relationship. I don't see this as a deal breaker at this point, but it definately is not something to ignore either.
I would suggest more non-threatening open and honest conversations about this where it is more seeking out what he feels about it and what he thinks could be causing the situation than merely just telling him how you feel about it, which in turn could be making it worse by having him feel like he is failing you and not fulfilling your needs.
It sounds like you are trying everything you can think about trying, but somehow it is not working. Maybe the routes you are going are not addressing the core problem for him. You need to figure out what that core problem is otherwise you are just spinning your wheels, going nowhere and will end up more and more frustrated with the situation.
Don't wait too long to have this conversation. What about the two of you going away for a weekend for a romantic getaway? Maybe being somewhere new will get him in the mood again.
Or do something fun and change your look. Be a wild redhead.
Originally Posted by RUBIES77 View Post
AND LET ME TELL YOU WHY: And judge for yourself what is happening to our society. I am not computer savvy, so I was not able to place the link here the appropriate way, but if you follow the address paying attention to the capital letters and lower key letters you should have no problem viewing what I did, which should answer your question as to probably why your boyfriend has lost interest in you, and it is not happening only to you, it is happening to many others in our society. There is too much happening out there. SEE FOR YOURSELF: YouTube - Latina booty Dancing Regaetone- Noche de Luna Llena You must copy everything exactly to be successful, or it may work directly from here, but you will see LATINA BOOTY DANCING REGAETONE. When men are exposed to all of this, they will have a tendency to loss more than interest. Good-luck to you.
(ROFLMAO) ----stares at screen-----(ROFLMAO Again!)
That was grrrreat.
Did you like the music? She goes beat by beat. I wonder if her mom/dad have ever seen that video of her!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Did you gain weight?
Do you have more bummy days?
Do you look a lot different?
Do you act a lot different?
Maybe he hates the skanky stuff and just never told you.
Mine hates lipstick and sluttly clothes.
He's grabby over chapstick, cotton and a tshirt.
(Which...ok..whatever...less work for me)
I dunno..something is off with your guy.
I mean..does it work when you actually try?
Or is it flacid city?
Does mental illness run in the family for him?
I really think myself its a gay or cheat thing.
A lot of guys are bi too and that confuses them.
I have gained weight, but I don't think the ten pounds in 4 years has done this kinda damage...i'd hope! As far as me acting different, we've only gotten closer and I'd hope im a more mature version of the 18 year old me.
The thing is, whenever we do have sex, its AMAZING. Like, gimme gimme gimmeeee more. Lol, definitely not flacid city. And then he'll say to me, "Why don't we do this more often?"
Exactly. Why are people so thick headed and slow on here. Some people on this planet are just not all that sexual, some are asexual, and some people's sex drive goes in cycles.
Don't wait too long to have this conversation. What about the two of you going away for a weekend for a romantic getaway? Maybe being somewhere new will get him in the mood again.
Or do something fun and change your look. Be a wild redhead.
I think that would be really helpful, but, as young BROKE college graduates, lol, we only take mental vacations
Did you gain weight?
Do you have more bummy days?
Do you look a lot different?
Do you act a lot different?
Maybe he hates the skanky stuff and just never told you.
Mine hates lipstick and sluttly clothes.
He's grabby over chapstick, cotton and a tshirt.
(Which...ok..whatever...less work for me)
I dunno..something is off with your guy.
I mean..does it work when you actually try?
Or is it flacid city?
Does mental illness run in the family for him?
I really think myself its a gay or cheat thing.
A lot of guys are bi too and that confuses them.
My psychology professor says that bisexualism is just an excuse, that it really does not exist. He says that it is a way of denying, that one is a homosexual, but cannot admitted it to the inner self, so therefore it is easier to say that one is bisexual.
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i just want his sex. Any ideas?
She sure can dance!
