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I imagine its location and time period. You can't overlook statistics though. The silent generation would be most likely to have fewer women in the workforce. I am a young boomer and the great majority of my cohorts worked. Growing up the only mothers I knew of (from my close neighbors, family and friend's parents) that worked were divorced.
I think that a lot of that is just the economics of the mid-20th century. The middle class was expanded due to postwar prosperity, progressive taxation and the fruits of the New Deal policies from decades prior finally coming in. So more households would have been able to AFFORD for the wife to not work, for a few notable decades there.
There were times where there was a far higher % of the population that struggled to survive, and I think that all of the able bodied...not just the wives, but also often the kids...chipped in and worked very hard. (Up until the labor reforms post Depression we still had kids in sweatshops and factories and mines. They are still in agriculture more than most people think. But this was not a rare thing.)
My Grandfather remembered the Depression. He was a young teen. He and his brother ran away from home and the abuse of their father and lived as hobos until old enough to enlist in the Navy.
And prior to the economic booms of mid century, even staying at home was pretty hard labor for anyone who couldn't afford to hire help. Imagine doing laundry manually! Cooking every single meal from scratch, having to make and mend the family's clothes. Preserving food before people had refrigerators.
But I do think that a lot of the households that had women who worked outside of the home, a big difference, is that they did not pay for child care. An older daughter might watch the little ones, or a grandparent or other adult in the extended family were able to care for the kids, or the kids all gathered at a neighbor's house after school for a few hours. My great grandmother cared for my Mom when she was little and her parents both worked. And she also cared for me when my parents and grandparents were all working, until she died when I was 5. Though I'm not sure who was caring for whom, since she was wheelchair bound and ancient for quite a bit of that time. But I knew how to read and cook and garden before she passed!
As for location...to some extent perhaps. I would say very much so if there were cultural enclaves, because it may have been part of a cultural norm in a community that was, say, Italian or German or whatever, I don't know. Or some affluent areas. But family members I cited in my last post were from all over the country. Tucson, Portland, rural Ohio, Virginia. I actually do question the statistics, because I suspect that a lot of the work that women did for pay was not documented or taxed, whether it was doing other people's washing under the table or employers just wanted to pay them very low wages and keep them off the books...I would bet that a whole lot of women's work was "invisible." (Shocking, I know.)
Heck, I just thought of another one, my Great Aunt who was born in 1930 and she was a secretary for the Cincinnati Gear Company for almost her entire adult life. But she never had children.
One more reason that I am, and always have been, child-free!
Each to their own.
As far as i am concerned. All the money in the world cannot buy the pride and happiness that comes from holding your newborn child, seeing the smile on their face or hearing the words "Daddy"
Last edited by danielsa1775; 11-02-2023 at 05:33 PM..
As far as i am concerned. All the money in the world cannot buy the pride and happiness that comes from holding your newborn child, seeing the smile on their face or hearing the words "Daddy"
So true.
I’m so glad I was there to see their first smiles, first steps, taught them to read, and now teaching them to drive. I’m so thankful to be a parent and to have been able to be home with them.
Right, the fantasy of the wife at home cooking and cleaning in heels and pearls was really only accessible to a certain class of people for a certain period of time. Lots of women throughout history worked in their family businesses and farms, they worked in shops and factories and offices and hospitals, they cooked and cleaned and cared for other people's children, they took in laundry and sewing, etc. In the past there were fewer resources for working women, especially if they had families of their own, but they did it.
But, did anyone actually cook in pearls and heels? That sounds unpleasant! I will wear an apron or my comfy house clothes to cook. I don’t wear shoes or jewels in the kitchen, so I always thought that was just on the sitcoms.
By that definition, only a small minority of marriages are modern marriages.
In the United States and across the west, Japan, etc., women cut back on their jobs when they have children and they do the majority of childcare and housework. This change often happens in their 30s.
This has become a defining feature of the nuclear family.
It is relatively rare for husbands and wives to contribute equally to breadwinning, earning, childcare and housework once they start having children.
Yep.
Things are changing though. More and more men are taking on equal childcare and housework. More women are getting out of unequal marriages, more women are having fewer or no children.
Things are changing though. More and more men are taking on equal childcare and housework. More women are getting out of unequal marriages, more women are having fewer or no children.
We live in a society that stopped believing in traditional sex roles a long time ago.
And yet, traditional sex roles are evident just about everywhere we look - whether it's in homes or schools or corporate boardrooms.
We live in a society that stopped believing in traditional sex roles a long time ago.
Relative to relationships, per the forum, it’s up to the couple how or why they determine such; it’s not up to you, me or societal ‘beliefs’ in the same way one’s masculinity or femininity is defined/aligned individually as well.
We live in a society that stopped believing in traditional sex roles a long time ago.
And yet, traditional sex roles are evident just about everywhere we look - whether it's in homes or schools or corporate boardrooms.
I find that fascinating.
First there is a biological basis for some, but not all, gender roles, so I think that is one reason that I don't think they will go away completely. When it comes to nursing babies women have an advantage. When it comes to repairs around the house requiring physical strength men have the advantage. So I think those types of tasks will stay pretty gendered.
Second there is a range of men and women in the world and there is a range of couples. Some relationships are just going to be more or less gendered.
Third when people complain about gender roles, the problem is often not gender roles per se, but the rigidity which gender roles are enforced. I enjoy cooking and don't mind grocery shopping, so traditional gender roles don't actually bother me, but I think relationships work best when both parties are carrying their share in the relationship. So to balance the load in the relationship so I don't feel taken advantage of, I might want my husband/boyfriend to say take over say the vacuuming or a few other female coded tasks. Also when I am sick, I might want him to take over the grocery shopping. So for me (and I think a lot of women), the issue is the rigidity of gender roles more so than the existence of gender roles.
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