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Why do people hit women, even when they are drunk...
I was drunk once, and walked in on my then-girlfriend having sex with someone else... I got mad (obviously), he ran away, and she stood there in front of me... my fists were clenched.
She asked if I was going to hit her then. I said give me a ******g break and walked away.
Why do people hit women, even when they are drunk...
I was drunk once, and walked in on my then-girlfriend having sex with someone else... I got mad (obviously), he ran away, and she stood there in front of me... my fists were clenched.
She asked if I was going to hit her then. I said give me a ******g break and walked away.
I don't know.
I walked in after a boyfriend & my best friend had sex, he ended up beating the crap out of me, knocking me out cold. I ended up with a broken nose, cracked or fractured rib, 2 black eyes plus he hit me in the left side of my head, I had 4 diamond earrings in that ear, he bent all of the posts on them. I swore that no man would ever lay a hand on me again and if they did, they would not get another chance.
Leilani, I hope things are improving for you. I'm betting it's a little bit easier with your husband locked up. Have you called the hotline and/or gone to a shelter? They really will take care of you. Just sending you my best wishes.
Things are getting better. I'm still in shock though. It will just be a matter of time before I can pick up all the pieces and really start to move forward. It's just that i can't believe that someone I've been with for 18 years can really hurt me like this. I started therapy last friday and will continue to go every friday evening.
He's still in jail. There's another court date next month that I'll have to attend. His first court date was last monday. I was too upset to go, but family services spoke on my behalf and gave me some resources.
Thanks for checking back in. I'm glad he's in jail as it'll give you a chance to get your life together. Therapy will help you most definitely. Sometimes you won't click with someone, if that's the case, don't worry, just keep looking for someone knew. I recently dumped a therapist who just didn't seem to click with me. She was more interested in talking about herself. I just wanted to throw that out there. Take care.
I think i got a good start with the therapist. I'll meet her every week until she/I feel I need to meet less frequent.
The kids are taking it very hard. They will be coming with me to my next session.
His mother is still upset with me. She keeps telling me that I'm messing up his life by keeping him in jail. She tried to bond him out but they wouldn't release him. She keeps trying to encourage me to go and visit him, which i will not do. I have another court date coming up on November 17th. Family services also mailed me a restrainer order.
Personally, I'd ignore the mother in law. At least for now. Negativity won't help you and she seems to be a big source. Let her "baby" her son. I'm glad they won't let him out. It must have been bad. I'm sorry for your kids, but remember, it's a good thing in the long run. You wouldn't want them getting hurt by him would you? So the choices you are making now are for your family. Not just yourself. Keep your head up!
i'm having some issues with my marriage right now. It's really all financial. I make about $51,000 per year as a Marketing Coordinator. I have a batchelors degree and feel that i'm totally under paid. I'm 35 and he's 39. We've been together since we were in high school and have 2 children together. He's a line chef at an upscale social club and right now he's making only $15/hour. He's not getting a lot of hours and I feel I'm carrying the bulk of the responsibilities at home. He gets frustrated because he said i don't make him feel "man" enough. It's really putting a strain on our relationship. I'm starting to feel completely overwhelmed with the bills and everything else. Not to mention our children are in high school.
He's working for a non-profit agency, so he doesn't get over-time. We're renting a two bedroom apartment and trying to save money to buy a house, but it's starting to get harder and harder to save. The rent is $975/month with heat and hot water included. We're financing two cars right now, a honda accord and a ford windstar ($350 & $320/month for each), insurance for both cars is about $200/month. I have a year and a half left on my loan and he's just started his. Then there's insurance for the family that i'm paying for ($265/pay check), lights - $60 - $100/month, groceries - $400/month, gas (for me anyway) - $50 - $60/week, credit card bills are down to $150/month, phone/cable/internet - $160/month.
I have no money left and i'm dipping into my savings left and right. I just had to pay $500 to fix my van and i just don't know what to do right now. I told him he needed to find another job, but he said that I need to help him. How hard can that be? I applied for a waitressing job and start next Tuesday. I'm tired of waiting around thinking that money's just going to appear from somewhere.
670.00 for two cars! That is almost as much as your rent that is just ridicuous. That is a lot of money wasted. You need to have insurance for your kids pay for food ect. These are all neceties but not two new cars! Either use public transportation or buy a used car with no loan. if it is just getting you back and forth to work there is no need to have a fancy car. Cheaper and older car will ower your car insurance as well. You can also slash some stations on the cable bill that you really don't need. Clip coupons when going food shopping even if it ohly saves you 10.00 a trip that is 40.00 a month that is in you pocket and could be saved. There is no need for you to be killing youself at a second job that will be less time with your kids. If your husband is the one not getting a lot of hours make him go get another job. Sorry it this sounds rude I really don't mean to be. I just think you can get rid of a lot things that you don't need and save more.
Last edited by Cindy15161; 10-07-2008 at 01:32 PM..
Reason: I was a little late on the forum and did not realize the situation had been solved. Divorce! Sorry!
I think i got a good start with the therapist. I'll meet her every week until she/I feel I need to meet less frequent.
The kids are taking it very hard. They will be coming with me to my next session.
His mother is still upset with me. She keeps telling me that I'm messing up his life by keeping him in jail. She tried to bond him out but they wouldn't release him. She keeps trying to encourage me to go and visit him, which i will not do. I have another court date coming up on November 17th. Family services also mailed me a restrainer order.
Thanks for checking in. I've wondered how you were doing.
Please, do not pick up the phone when his mother calls. Seriously, you do not need this right now. You won't be able to focus on your kids and yourself with her pointing the finger at you.
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