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It seems like guys these days are so afraid of "looking gay" it makes forming new friendships difficult, especially among adults. For instance, two guys can't go out to eat together unless they have known each other for a long time, and if they do, it needs to be either fast food or a sports bar kind of place - no nice restaurants because that looks ghey. Two guys can't go to the movies together - if they do it has to be either a large group or the guys have to sit apart so a theater full of strangers don't think they are a couple. Heaven forbid any guys show physical affection for each other in a non-joking way or start talking to each other about their personal lives or any kind of serious conversation. Now sports, hunting, fishing, etc are all acceptable but what if I am not into these things? I don't consider myself gay but I sometimes wonder because I desire close, companion-style male friendship and most straight guys seem deathly afraid of this (with the exception of with their best friend they grew up with). Other cultures don't struggle with this, so why do Americans? Does me living in the rural South have anything to do with this or is this phenomenon nationwide?
It may be where you are from, but it also may be an age group. My husband (late 30's) has a best friend from grade school that has been going through a rough time in his life (divorce, business in trouble) and recently they are together all the time alone. They go out to dinner, movies, and have even been known to do that weird little "guy hug" thing in public and it doesn't bother them one bit. Also, we have friends from Europe and they hug and kiss each of us when they visit, so I do know what you mean about Americans being strange that way.
I wouldn't worry about it. Personally I don't give a f*** what people think. I go to sports events, fishing, hunting, movies on occasions..... with males only. Not worried what people think.
It may be where you are from, but it also may be an age group. My husband (late 30's) has a best friend from grade school that has been going through a rough time in his life (divorce, business in trouble) and recently they are together all the time alone. They go out to dinner, movies, and have even been known to do that weird little "guy hug" thing in public and it doesn't bother them one bit. Also, we have friends from Europe and they hug and kiss each of us when they visit, so I do know what you mean about Americans being strange that way.
It could be my age because there are plenty of guys in their twenties that have this depth of friendship but they almost ALWAYS go way back like your husband and his friend do. If I was to try to do these things with a guy I met more recently, he would accuse me of being gay and likely cut off contact with me. I moved around every two years growing up so I never made any lasting friendships.
I think it is a matter of culture. Among Latins, it is OK for males, especially those who are related, to be more affectionate with each other. I always hug and kiss my male family members when I greet them, always hug my friends, and am more touchy with them. But sometimes this leads to cultural clashes. A pair of Ecuadorean brothers were killed in NYC recently; the brothers were walking down the street arm in arm after a night of drinking and they were attacked by a group of men who shouted antigay slurs to them.
Dude-maybe you ARE GAY? Isnt it such feelings that make guys start questioning thier sexuality in the first place? Just askin--
I have considered it heavily, but I really have no desire for sexual relationship with a man. If I was to be in a gay relationship it wouldn't work because I have boundries.
Location: I never said I was perfect so no refunds here sorry!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. Dan
Dude-maybe you ARE GAY? Isnt it such feelings that make guys start questioning thier sexuality in the first place? Just askin--
For that to bother you enough to post it as a personal problem you need to consider that you have a strong gay current running thru you...
Either that or your makin up junk for your personal entertainment...and if thats the case you could have done a better job than to put yourself out there like this....
I have considered it heavily, but I really have no desire for sexual relationship with a man. If I was to be in a gay relationship it wouldn't work because I have boundries.
You sound quite confused. Nothing unusual about that.
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