Marriage...are men as enthused as women? (family, child support, American)
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I can tell that the OP wasn't around before the women's movement.
How'd you like to have been the top graduate of your ivy league law school and be offered a job as a secretary in a law firm as opposed to your fellow male grads who were offered jobs as the attys they were trained for?
Heightened awareness of certain things as being immoral such as it being allright to beat your wife, or that women must be asking to be raped and enjoy it, or that women must be treated as slaves or as children. These attitudes weren't uncommon before. Sure there were other consequences, some good, some not so much, but all in all things are better and for everyone.
Believe me, I can tell you from first hand experience that women make out much worse in divorce generally ending up in poverty. What you hear about in places like California is not anywhere near the norm. These days there is no such thing as alimony and if there is it's more like two years of a couple of hundred dollars a month. The same with child support, it's very low. Men definately make out better, no matter how much they like to complain, while women have an extreme struggle.
Marriage in many cases is also better for men. Women oftentimes still have to work, take care of the house, and the children, and look after the man. They may think they're getting away easy not being married but their stability factor goes way down and their personal risk factor goes way up.
The actual statistics totally contradict what you are saying!
The actual statistics totally contradict what you are saying!
Statistics don't tell the whole story, and I don't see any ones in here that aren't being twisted with accompanying commentary. Just because the woman may receive child support and alimony doesn't mean she's suddenly living in the lap of luxury. Sorry, but look around you: single moms usually struggle financially. No matter how you cut it, the home and children have gone from having 2 full incomes to just one full income & a small portion of the other. Doesn't sound like any great deal for women at all.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sgoldie
Well, let's just see if we can find anyone on here who did make a killing on a divorce and who was also a woman.
It has also become very clear to me that I see more older men who desire being married than I see older women. I wonder why that is?
Agreed! I have yet to meet an old widowed woman who wants to marry again, but old widowed men often seem eager to.
Hey, I can make statements with no foundations also: No, actually, divorce is just as terrible if not worse for women!
One must look at the source of many stats = females who sugar coat them when it's about how bad it is for males and inflate it to make it look worse when it's for their female comrades.
Good post. But I've seen weddings where the bouqet just falls to the ground. Trend is popping up where women feel it's a curse to be married. Well, maybe not a curse but why rush!
Indeed. What's the rush? That's what I had to repeat to my dh for years before we got married. It's a big commitment and shouldn't be rushed into.
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Originally Posted by Miss Crabcakes
I can only speak for myself. My wedding is nearing 2 months away and while I've had a few cold-feet moments, my fiance has assured me he is not the least bit nervous and cannot wait to get married. But he's the marrying type. He proposed after just one year and contends that he knew I was the one in only the first few months of dating.
He is more excited than I am. But I'm catching up.
It was the same case for me. I had an anxiety attack when he asked and pretty much freaked out the weeks preceeding the wedding. But, I have to say, post wedding has been great. We're actually better married than we were dating. That was a surprise.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sgoldie
Marriage in many cases is also better for men. Women oftentimes still have to work, take care of the house, and the children, and look after the man. They may think they're getting away easy not being married but their stability factor goes way down and their personal risk factor goes way up.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kmc757
The actual statistics totally contradict what you are saying!
Although, not all stats agree with the above study. It could vary by country. Either way, it's no secret that, in the US at least, married women that work, also take care of the home, and are primary care givers to the children. One of my gf's is living that type of situation, and it sucks.These women have a full plate. OTOH, I think this is changing for some. Perhaps I'm an idealist, but I know that my dh isn't one of those kind of guys.
Well it seems from NJGuy's other posts that he'd like someone he can dominate. And if he perceives that American women are after his money just wait till he finds that supposedlly submissive foreigner.
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