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So I've been dating a guy about 3 times now, and he is recently out of a relationship. However, past couple of days been feeling like something isnt right.
On our 2nd date he tells me that he is still living with his so-called X, but that they are completely separated. We actually ran into the X at a bar on our first date on a Saturday night, but there wasnt any qualms about me being there with him.
Well now Im thinking that maybe this whole thing is a mistake now because he seems to be pulling back. He was working 2 jobs before, and quit one of them last week. This is making me think that maybe he quit it for the X (maybe cause they never got to see each other) and that they get to spend more time together now...Just a moment ago we were texting and when I asked about our date this Friday he didnt respond back.
Am I being insecure, or does it seem like something isnt right? I just feel silly because it seems like now Im caught in some love triangle, yet this guy approached me first, asked me out the past 3 dates, and called me almost every day and now it seems to have stopped. I think maybe it has something to do with that.
What do you think?
The first "red" flag and clue was the fact that he was only out of his relationship by 3 months. When people jump from one relationship to the next all they end up doing is carry their "baggage" right along with them.
The fact that you knew that already should have sent you running along time ago. Sounds to me as if he is far from resolving his past issue's with this previous relationship. GET OUT! RUN!!!
Your only going to end getting hurt in the long run. There is billions of men in this world, why are you trippin over (1)?
Wait a minute but what am I missing? You are wondering how to break it off with this guy but I thought you were wondering why he hadn't called you back because you liked a guy you were dating to call every day or at least every other day...huh??? I think you may be the smother mother! If he isn't calling you have no need to wonder how to break it of it is done and with only three dates you have nothing to break off...if he calls don't call him back...done somple over and you are good to move on
Wait a minute but what am I missing? If he isn't calling you have no need to wonder how to break it of it is done and with only three dates you have nothing to break off...if he calls don't call him back...done somple over and you are good to move on
Well, he actually texted me last night and called me this afternoon, but then....(read on)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunnnee
The first "red" flag and clue was the fact that he was only out of his relationship by 3 months. When people jump from one relationship to the next all they end up doing is carry their "baggage" right along with them.
Your only going to end getting hurt in the long run. There is billions of men in this world, why are you trippin over (1)?
I didnt even have to read this but while I was driving back into town today thats EXACTLY what I though! That in the end I'm going to end up being the one hurt again. I could just see it now. Recall, his reason for not calling me earlier this week and unsure of whether to see me this weekend was because "things are crazy at home"
He called me today, and even though we had a date set for tonight I broke it off with him. Told him that I feel there's too much distraction going on and that I dont want to see him anymore until he moves out.
He was speechless...
I feel bad for breaking it off with him though. Like I was really feeling him and all the chemistry was there, which is why I broke it off. How can I love him when he may still be having sex with his X, or sleeping in the same bed, or doing it to make her jealous. It was making me insecure just thinking about it
Good for you!!
You definetly did the right thing. Yeah...I bet he was speechless!
Yeah, but I still feel kinda bad. Like tonight was going to be our 4th date, so Im feeling kinda lonley and sad right now. Im also feeling angry for some reason too...I dont know why
Yeah, but I still feel kinda bad. Like tonight was going to be our 4th date, so Im feeling kinda lonley and sad right now. Im also feeling angry for some reason too...I dont know why
You did the right thing honey. What you are feeling is normal, you're just disappointed about what could have been. Sorry
Yeah, but I still feel kinda bad. Like tonight was going to be our 4th date, so Im feeling kinda lonley and sad right now. Im also feeling angry for some reason too...I dont know why
Your probably feeling angry because you have come to realize that the way he "played" you was not right. I mean, still living with the ex?
Your probably feeling angry because you have come to realize that the way he "played" you was not right. I mean, still living with the ex?
I do feel a bit played. Its like, why would he do that? Why show me all the love and affection that he did, call and text me daily, introduce me to his friends, buy me dinner...yet he's still living under the same roof.
Im starting to regret breaking it off, maybe I should have just played along with the drama. I mean, don't we all like a little drama sometimes. Does it not feel great to have 'taken someone else's man' and getting away with it
OK maybe thats wrong, but I wont lie I was fantasizing about it. But reality knows I'd probably get dumped, so better me to do it 1st....But Im thinking, what if I did the wrong thing? What if him and his X really have nothing to do together? I know it goes against so many things....but this guy really liked me though, what if it was a mistake?
I have no idea how some women will even consider dating a man who is still living with his "ex." There is a point in being a hopeless (and hopeful) romantic. . and then there is sheer stupidity in putting ones self out there like that to someone in that situation, not thinking, "oh, this COULD happen. I better not just because of the WHAT IFS." No man still living with his "ex" is 'that' good to where I would have to select him over men who are single, not living with their "ex."
OP: your comment of, "Does it not feel great to have 'taken someone else's man' and getting away with it," lost any and all empathy you could have siphoned out of me. Love and affection? Suh-weetie, something tells me that if you consider what he gave you was "love and affection," you would not know it if it sat square on your face.
Today, Saturday, is National Mental Health Day. Enjoy it.
OP: your comment of, "Does it not feel great to have 'taken someone else's man' and getting away with it," lost any and all empathy you could have siphoned out of me. Love and affection? Suh-weetie, something tells me that if you consider what he gave you was "love and affection," you would not know it if it sat square on your face.
Today, Saturday, is National Mental Health Day. Enjoy it.
Im sorry, it wasnt like that...I was just using that very loosely. If I really wanted to 'take her man' I would have had sex with him last weekend and I would have said yes to tonight's date and not even mentioned my concerns about seeing someone who is 'ex involved'.
But you were spot on, why choose him over other single guys. Makes so much sense....
My only issue is I havent found an available single guy Im crazy about in months. Which sucks because I always end up with people who are either in a relationship, just out of one, or not telling me they are in one!
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You are wondering how to break it off with this guy but I thought you were wondering why he hadn't called you back because you liked a guy you were dating to call every day or at least every other day...huh??? I think you may be the smother mother! If he isn't calling you have no need to wonder how to break it of it is done and with only three dates you have nothing to break off...if he calls don't call him back...done somple over and you are good to move on
Good for you!! 
