Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:10 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,217 posts, read 100,800,760 times
Reputation: 40205

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by pitt_transplant View Post
See..now I think he should of f-ed those wenches and got it out of his system before he met me.

Fantasy life is for children in my book
Whatever floats you and your partners boat

I just know that some fantasy can be lots of fun in my boat
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:10 PM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,396,612 times
Reputation: 8075
Quote:
Originally Posted by pitt_transplant View Post
Sorry but knowing what you want despite another's value is the exact opposite of self esteem issues. I dont think it makes you mentally ill to have that/want it. But it def means you are not sexually satisifed with what you have

Antler & Jason...soul mind hotties in my book.

WTF you doing this saturday ♥
I think there is some truth to it.

However, I do think that we cannot say for sure that your sexuality will match your partner's sexuality. That is not an opinion, THAT is a fact. Even when 2 people are sexually comparible, one of them will always be slightly more sexual then the other. One of them needs more sex and more variety EVEN if their sex life is good and fulfilling. That's why communication is the key and unrealistic expectations can ruin everything. If this is something that a partner physically needs to satisfy curiousity, it's hard to deny it.
Some people have rich enough imagination not to use porn, some people need a little help of porn.

I think that we can never predict what will happen down the road in a marriage. Some women get so wild after a certain age, they need certain stimulation. Some men get just as wild. It doesn't mean they don't love their partners, it doesn't meant that their partners don't satisfy them, what it means that they need something a little extra to satisfy natural urges.
Human body and mind is such a twisted thing. It plays games with you, you really NEVER know how things will turn out after years of living with someone. There needs to be room for adjustment and in OP's case it seems as she understands this and takes matters into her hands.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:11 PM
 
2,482 posts, read 8,737,501 times
Reputation: 1972
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Whatever floats you and your partners boat

I just know that some fantasy can be lots of fun in my boat
DRESS UP!!!!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:14 PM
 
Location: DFW
40,955 posts, read 49,260,682 times
Reputation: 55010
Quote:
Originally Posted by SmerkyGrl View Post
DRESS UP!!!!
Yep, and with Halloween parties coming up it's a good reason to go get that sexy cop uniform with handcuffs.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:18 PM
 
8,410 posts, read 39,282,719 times
Reputation: 6367
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Whatever floats you and your partners boat

I just know that some fantasy can be lots of fun in my boat
Oh you know I love you but our relationship values don't do the matchy matchy

But I only see the point in settling with that if you have kids that depend on your stability. If you don't have that responsibility ...it really hold no positivity in compromise for me or the other person.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:19 PM
 
20,730 posts, read 19,392,808 times
Reputation: 8295
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marylandkitten View Post
Lol.. 15 pages later ~

We talked things out tonight. It wasn't pretty, and it wasn't all pleasant, but it was constructive. Compromise is what is needed. And there's no compromise without communication. If masturbating is a way of life for him, for his needs (regardless of me), then it all bottoms down to, if we want to cultivate this relationship, we learn to work together on the things that are important to us. Top priorities for me are honesty. If a high sex drive is high on his list, then we combine them, rather than butting heads leaving one of us being deceitful, and one of us being miserable.

I want to thank you guys again for all of your chiming. The different opinions of everyone was truly eye-opening. All I can say (and agree with) is, I hope you all find someone to live your life with that compliments your style, no matter how out of the ordinary it may seem to the rest of us. And God forbid, I hope you don't find yourself at the mercy of certain city-data members willing to chew you raw if you ask for help on here along the way.

He brought me flowers and candy, I bought him a porn-flick. We met eachother half way at the door on the way home. We'll make it, yet.

Have a good night guys.

Hi Marylandkitten,

Glad to hear it you are finding a way. I don't ultimately think porn is the most productive of things and it, like anything, can go wrong. I am a Christian so I have my own moral struggles. However your basic naked woman has always been a hard wire drive with me. There is no art or land scape that is its equal.
How does a man really view women? Honestly he would typically like to have sex with more than one. I would. Though I didn't like the idea of failing to be a full time mate. However the drive is there. Strangely I was able to be celibate without a woman for 8 years. However after a few weeks, even the Sears catalog looked good. It is because a real woman is a barrier that can be strong enough to enforce this. Our passing fantasies are far more challenging. All I do is passive resistance. I do refuse to feel guilty when the resistance fails. It was just something I was born with from the beginning. I just put some pressure on the drive so that it is not unrestrained. No sex of any kind for a month just was never possible.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:19 PM
 
Location: Tucson
42,831 posts, read 88,221,103 times
Reputation: 22814
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
I just know that some fantasy can be lots of fun in my boat
I never said anything was wrong with both partners enjoying porn together if they like it. What is wrong is for one to masturbate with porn somewhere alone in the house while the other is home, too. There was some movie in which a guy was "retreating" after dinner to his woodwork shop to spend time on his "hobby"... The rhythm of the woodwork was quite memorable! I think it was Swedish... They tend to make sick movies.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:20 PM
 
37,653 posts, read 46,084,092 times
Reputation: 57256
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
But her point was, not all men want a doormat - your ex apparently did, which has tainted your perception in some ways when it comes to men and relationships sadly, but most good men want a PARTNER
Actually it has not tainted my perception at ALL. I enjoy men far too much to let one control freak do that. I simply was responding to her post.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:21 PM
 
Location: South FL
9,444 posts, read 17,396,612 times
Reputation: 8075
Quote:
Originally Posted by gwynedd1 View Post
Hi Marylandkitten,

Glad to hear it you are finding a way. I don't ultimately think porn is the most productive of things and it, like anything, can go wrong. I am a Christian so I have my own moral struggles. However your basic naked woman has always been a hard wire drive with me. There is no art or land scape that is its equal.
How does a man really view women? Honestly he would typically like to have sex with more than one. I would. Though I didn't like the idea of failing to be a full time mate. However the drive is there. Strangely I was able to be celibate without a woman for 8 years. However after a few weeks, even the Sears catalog looked good. However it is because A real woman is a barrier that can be strong enough to enforce this. Our passing fantasies are far more challenging. All I do is passive resistance. I do refuse to feel guilty when the resistance fails. It was just something I was born with from the beginning. I just put some pressure on the drive so that it is not unrestrained. No sex of any kind for a month just was never possible.
Tell me about it. I hear you there.
Most people would never think I'm a Christian after reading my posts. Original sin always kicks in.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-14-2009, 10:25 PM
 
37,653 posts, read 46,084,092 times
Reputation: 57256
Quote:
Originally Posted by gwynedd1 View Post
Strangely I was able to be celibate without a woman for 8 years. However after a few weeks, even the Sears catalog looked good.

I can fully understand.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top