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That's an interesting subject right there Denny. Some men will put up with trainwreck women if she's hot and puts out but this is where the cycle of doom continues because then the woman becomes an even bigger trainwreck after being used by a guy. This is where the bitterness towards men starts to set in. Whereas some men may want to be her savior others send her spiraling downward even further. If she's already a trainwreck and she has the bad boy syndrome combined I'd say that's one woman that's f.u.b.ar., she's pretty much done for unless she wakes up and smells the coffee.
That's an interesting subject right there Denny. Some men will put up with trainwreck women if she's hot and puts out but this is where the cycle of doom continues because then the woman becomes an even bigger trainwreck after being used by a guy. This is where the bitterness towards men starts to set in. Whereas some men may want to be her savior others send her spiraling downward even further. If she's already a trainwreck and she has the bad boy syndrome combined I'd say that's one woman that's f.u.b.ar.
Hi wanderlust76,,
This is the exact thing we see. Women complain about dirt bag "eligible" men while the less attractive man is invisible. Women are bitter after being dumped 5 times by rock stars while some of these men finally get a shot at them when they are 30 and bitter.
It all goes back to the fact that young women are stupid, yep stupid. Who isn't at 18? Stupid young women used to have society and family to spot these guys and stop them. Now a guy with a funky hat can bed them. Some women do figure it out and some adjust but there is an attrition rate.
Its quite a pickle. A man who is reliable may be reliable because other women don't want him. The odds may be that she does not want him either.
This is the exact thing we see. Women complain about dirt bag "eligible" men while the less attractive man is invisible. Women are bitter after being dumped 5 times by rock stars while some of these men finally get a shot at them when they are 30 and bitter.
It all goes back to the fact that young women are stupid, yep stupid. Who isn't at 18? Stupid young women used to have society and family to spot these guys and stop them. Now a guy with a funky hat can bed them. Some women do figure it out and some adjust but there is an attrition rate.
Its quite a pickle. A man who is reliable may be reliable because other women don't want him. The odds may be that she does not want him either.
Yeah it works both ways,bottom line is good looking people get away with allot more while below average or ugly ones are the leftovers who get sombody after theyve been used and abused by people mroe visually appealing..
Be that as it may, the term does describe a social phenomenon, and that phenomenon exists whether you use the term or not. Y'all sound rather upset about it all, to be honest.
Neither of them sounded the least bit "upset" to me. What they say holds a lot of truth. It just isn't your "truth", evidently.
I used to work a day job and night job. The day job was to pay the bills and have insurance. The night job was something I enjoyed with people I liked being around. I normally dated people I met on the night job. Some of the day job guys made assumptions about the guys I dated, really based on superficialities. The guy has a performance car - bad boy. The guy plays in a band - bad boy. The guy has a motorcycle - bad boy. They didn't know these guys at all, just made negative assumptions that had no merit. They would make wise cracks about it, and it only made them look petty. Maybe learn the facts before making such accusations.
Some may see me as a bad boy? The truth is, I am a very nice guy that doesn't take any crap! Except from one person, my boss. He owns the place.
The men who pick trainwreck women often have issues of their own. Maybe they need to feel like a savior in order to feel good about themselves. Maybe they think someone who's more together won't need them and could potentially leave them for someone else. Trainwreck women are a magnet for these men.
I've known men AND women just like that. They like to think that they can help the other person and "save" them or something. Problem is they really don't know how but think they are doing "all the right things" for them. Troubles really escalate when the "savior" realizes that it's not working, blames the "savee" and feels unappreciated and angry. If they dump their "failure" they'll go look for another one who'll appreciate "all they do" for them. It's really a losing proposition but some folks are stuck in that mode and will never be happy.
One time I removed the tag off of a mattress. You know, those tags that say do not remove under penalty of law. I'm a baaaaaaaaaad boy.
I'm sure you owned the mattress, silly!
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223
and resent those men who don't treat life as if it had a giant biohazard sticker attached to it. Then they blame women for liking them.
Hilarious, cpg! Me likie!
Quote:
Originally Posted by gwynedd1
What they really mean by "bad boy" is a good looking and confident jerk who will usually dump them. They do often leave quite a trail. One good man can make 1 woman happy. A cad can embitter 20. So there is that...
As much as I hate to do that, for the sake of the argument, I'll have to agree with you on this one.
Neither of them sounded the least bit "upset" to me. What they say holds a lot of truth. It just isn't your "truth", evidently.
Well, brat, cpg didn't really disagree with me, he just made some poor generalizations about anyone who uses the term. Denny's comment was perfectly fine in retrospect.
I guess that means he is talking about you, too. We all seem to be here on a thread about the bay boy label.
I will say one thing about women who have a habit of falling for a-holes who go through women like I go through bottles of hair conditioner (my hair's long). It can be very easy to get caught up in the allure of wanting to be "the one," and by "the one" I mean the girl who makes the a-hole player change his ways, see the light, and fall madly in love with her. It's an ego thing. It's a pride thing. And it is a self-esteem thing. The girl thinks somewhere along the lines of, If I can make him - the guy who doesn't fall for girls - fall for me, then that gives me some sort of power. It means I'm special. I was able to change him. I conquered the challenge that no other girl could. These same girls want those reformed a-hole players to then put them up on a pedestal as the angelic figure who changed his life forever.
I know every girl is not like this. Duh. But I have met plenty of girls who are and most of them don't even realize the underlying issues. I definitely didn't. I was just like this to a T when it came to a certain guy a few years ago. Wow, that experience taught me a lot. Rule #1: Do not ever go out attempting to change someone. If they change, it will be on their own accord. Any influence from you is accidental. You cannot purposefully change someone.
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The truth is, I am a very nice guy that doesn't take any crap! Except from one person, my boss. He owns the place.
