Author Finds Marriage Benefits Men more than Women

[OngletNYC]

Originally Posted by Thursday007

She did not want to get remarried and neither did her husband after they both had gone through very horrible divorces and they were happy just to co exist together. Immigration ejected him from the country and the only way they could be together and return to the United States was if they were married. This made her think long and hard about the institution of marriage, about her preconcieved ideas of marriage which led to the downfall of her first and while abroad, prior to marrying and returning to the US she embarked on a journey to learn more about marriage - her own ideals, different cultures and various aspects of them. Cheif among these was the concept of 'the wedding' emphasis and 'romantic love, sex and infatuation' being the cornerstone of most divorces when marriages are based on that alone.

I understand the back story, but still she made a choice to get married. Nobody forced her into anything.

Beyond that, she is a professional writer & journalist who found a new topic to write about. It's as simple as that.

[AZDesertBrat]

Originally Posted by Avienne

I thought that what the OP said was established a long, long time ago.

Let's face it: Men created marriage back when marrying meant getting property or ruling an adjacent country, and the benefits have been stacked in their favor ever since.

However, perhaps it's most telling that at the old folks home, most of the men want to get married again, and most of the women want nothing to do with it.

The men want someone to take care of them.

The women say their days of taking care of a man are over.

Ask your grandma. She'll tell you.

I'm a grandma...actually I'm a great grandma. Ask me! I'll tell you! Granted some old folks DO get married but most women don't want to. You are correct!

[NMyTree]

Originally Posted by Avienne

Let's face it: Men created marriage back when marrying meant getting property or ruling an adjacent country, and the benefits have been stacked in their favor ever since.

Live in the real world much?

Originally Posted by Avienne

However, perhaps it's most telling that at the old folks home, most of the men want to get married again, and most of the women want nothing to do with it.

The men want someone to take care of them.

The women say their days of taking care of a man are over.

Ask your grandma. She'll tell you.

Interestingly enough, my experience speaks of an entirely different reality.

A reality where a 92 year old husband was taking care of his 91 yeard old wife, because she was incapable of taking care of herself.

A reality where some elderly women have expressed the desire to be married, again. A reality where husbands and wives often switch back and forth in their roles of taking care of each other, the home and the children; as a result of their job's scheduling, illnesses and life in general; through out the lives or the duration of their marriage.

The reality is that in this day and age (and it's been like this for decades, now), men/husbands are just as often taking care of their wives, children and homes. Depeding on the individual situations and dynamics of each individual family or married couple.

Comments like yours are laughable. In fact, your comments are not dissimilar from the kind of sexist and misogynist comments some men make and that women so often get all worked up over.

[gwynedd1]

Originally Posted by jdm2008

Well divorce is such a large factor in her premise, that her ignoring it makes her point meaningless.

Hi jdm2008,

I completely agree. Marriage happiness must include the eventuality of divorce which tends to make men very miserable. The reason why men tend to remarry is their sexual market value remains flatter. An attractive man at 25 tends to retain his attractiveness more so at 40 than the wife he is divorcing. Women tend to have sexual market value early in life. Men have what ever it is most of their life which could be very high or very low through out their entire life. Men who marry tend to be the ones a bit higher on the scale.