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No, I do get it:
- low self-esteem
- projection as to how it would effect her if in a similar situation
- bonding, and siding with, women who are in that predicament
- motherly instinct
- unsuccessful castration of the male for not wanting to raise someone's mistake (actually doing him a favor)
- indication that you might not be as tractable as she expected
- and then some
How am I doing so far? I get it. It means you're not "whippable" material. I just wanted to hear other points of view.
If a guy doesn't want to date single moms... What's wrong with that? No one has ever answered that question for me. I don't feel it's my place to raise another mans child. If that makes me an ass, oh well
I guess it would depend. If it's just dating you aren't raising the child...you shouldn't even be meeting the child.
If you are looking for a wife then that's different.
Personally, if I were single and just casually dating for social reasons, I wouldn't give a rats pahtootie if he didn't meet my criteria for a partner in marriage. If he was fun and I got along with him I'd go out and be social with him. If I were looking for "the one" I'd be more selective.
While people have opinions it does seem outlandish that my opinion of not wanting to date single mothers affects how she thinks of me. Ruining the chance to have something good because I don't want to date women with children. What's better is you don't have children yourself and you don't want any at all. That's funny if someone said that to me they can freely walk because they aren't good enough for me.
I don't see why the OP is getting his ass handed to him.
If he doesn't want to date women with kids, it is his prerogative.
I'm not real thrilled with the idea myself, if I were single. Especially at my age. When you get into your 40's the women that I would be dating would most likely have kids, and most likely they would be older. I've heard stories about older people not staying together because one of the person kids were a major PITA. I heard a story about how this guy in his 50's was dating a woman and one of her sons was well into his 20's was always jobless, broke, and was taking advantage of his mother, this guy even gave the kid a job with his company, the kid screwed it up,he also ended up stealing a lot of this guys tools and the mother was blind to it all, when the kid wanted to move back in with mom, she let him.
So this guy couldn't deal with that drama decided to move on. They really hit if off aside from the slacker kid and the mother's lack of dealing with him properly.
I realize this doesn't alway happen, but I believe it happens enough to not want to deal with it.
I think its crazy for anyone to hold that against another person, man or woman. Women have all kinds of different requirements and so do men. That's just one of the many. Is she also going to hate you cause you don't want to date a woman who is 6'6" or 4'0" or because you don't want to date a woman with no teeth?
I'm really miffed now. I don't come here to make friends. I've never owned a pair of rose colored glasses. And it's a part of my cultural make-up that an educated childless white male pairs up with his female equivalent, along many scalar dimensions. Yes, I present an opinion which is too conservative, isn't politically correct but, rather, is regulated by a brain that weighs pros and cons, just like that of any true blue ISTJ.
But what do you bring to the equation beyond your, no doubt, nice paycheck? I've read your posts on here and have never once seen a post that shows any trace of love, joy, humor (OMG, you have a smiley emoticon in this one - as close as it gets), compassion or affection. Everything is steeped in misanthropy, bitterness and scorn for human foibles. What would you add to someone's life besides another income?
Your concern, expressed here, of appearing "castrated" or "whipped" just betrays your emotional immaturity. You are terrified of being a chump. Yet you've already castrated yourself in your inability to live as an adult would, with a reasonable amount of fearlessness and emotional openness. Teens worry about looking whipped to other people; mature adults live by their own code and desires. Adults are secure in the knowledge that they are making choices based on facts, their own moral foundation and their inclinations, and accept that's the best they can do.
I think she was on the fence about you and reducing her niece and nephew to so much unwanted baggage was just the straw that broke the camel's back. People want someone who will add to their life, their happiness and their sense of security. They don't want someone they can't rely on emotionally, and I don't think you project an image of steadfastness with regard to anything but your own interests.
Maybe you're completely different IRL, but you're just a big downer on here for the most part. I'm sure you're very goodlooking, law-abiding, well-traveled and financially comfortable, but what self-supporting woman would welcome a guy into her life who seems like he starts every morning with a glass of bile and superiority rather than OJ?
I don't even dislike you. I just find the whole thing sad. If I believed in any sort of god, I'd probably pray for you. As it is, I just kinda wish you'd actually find something that made you happy because I can't imagine going through life like you do. I'm sorry.
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I don't come here to make friends. I've never owned a pair of rose colored glasses. And it's a part of my cultural make-up that an educated childless white male pairs up with his female equivalent, along many scalar dimensions. Yes, I present an opinion which is too conservative, isn't politically correct but, rather, is regulated by a brain that weighs pros and cons, just like that of any true blue ISTJ. 
