Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
If you're in a town of 1, 2, 10 million people and can't find a date...that's on YOU. Where they do that at?
I dont live in a town of 1, 2 or 10 million people.
Listen...for all you saying "its just me", unless you have lived where I am living and seen the dating scene here yourself, you really cant make that comment.
People who have lived in a city their whole lives usually find it easier to date thru networking friends, ect. I've been here for about 5 months and Im used to dating in a place over a 1,000 miles from here.
Its amazing how you can go from one corner of the US, and things are completely different than the other corner and vice versa.
exactly...you're 51, Im 22. We most definently will not be dating I'll tell you that.
No 'girlfriends' told me anything. It is actual experiences that I've had with older men...in their upper 20s and lower 30s! I say that because at my age, people who are in their upper 20s and 30s dont see me as relationship material because of my age and the presumed levels in life where we stand. I dated countlesss number of men in that age range, and at one point was all I dated because they were more stable/indendent than man in their lower 20s. But it would never materialize to anything more than a couple fancy dinners, sex, and then never hearing from them again. And if I didnt give up sex, they would try to force it, or stop talking to me all together.
One such guy, was a very sexy Hispanic doctor in his mid 30s. We had all the chemistry, but he wouldn't settle down with me because I was 20 at the time and I highly doubt he seen me as 'relationship' material. We went on a couple of dates, and then he started acting lazy and one night while I was at his place, I stated that I was hungry and he told me there's McDonalds down the street
I mainly date men in my age group between 22-24, I don't go beyond about 25 because its usually 'players' out for younger girls. But thats not to say I turn them down if they are...but I dont see them as 'relationship' material.
That's probably a huge part of your problem. How many men under 25 are looking for serious relationships? I'm around your age and I seriously think you should give older men a chance.
I dont live in a town of 1, 2 or 10 million people.
Listen...for all you saying "its just me", unless you have lived where I am living and seen the dating scene here yourself, you really cant make that comment.
People who have lived in a city their whole lives usually find it easier to date thru networking friends, ect. I've been here for about 5 months and Im used to dating in a place over a 1,000 miles from here.
Its amazing how you can go from one corner of the US, and things are completely different than the other corner and vice versa.
15 million people in Texas and can't find a man? You have to APPLY yourself baby. Work on your figure, work on your education, your interests, and your friendliness toward others.
I am finding it a mission to live a normal, happy life in this city. The dating circle here seems so dead and limited to me. I have never had this much trouble finding someone to do something as simple as go to a movie. But lately, I have been forced to go to the movies alone or with the same friend since I moved here. Its been over 5 months and I've yet to get a movie date out of anyone. Weekend after weekend I have no date.
It seems like many of the men here are more interested in going to a bar, if that. The number of flaky people I've encountered here is mind-boggling. The men seem all 'ooo wow' about me, but cant ever get around to setting up something meanigful. And when they do, it usually turns out they are just using me. Either as arm candy, or for a free ride...its never genuine.
I usually date Hispanic men and occasionally, Black and White. The Hispanic men here are totally indifferent. They seem to view me as some kind of 'alien'. Like...'oooo, I never been with a Black person before'. The Black guys...well they are no different. In fact, I haven't gone on a date with a single Black guy here because they act so flaky! It never leads up to anything. I've also encountered numerous Black men who had reservations against other Black people. The White guys....they seem too shy to approach me. And if I do, they just say a few words and then just walk away.
I just cant live this kind of life. Im not desparate for a man, but if its going to be so hard just to get a friggin Friday or Saturday night date, I don't want to be like that. As much as I want to see a particular movie, it hurts to have to go alone again and again. The men I have met in San Antonio, they seem to have no interest or desire to do something outside of a bar.
So my question is: if you're non-White/Hispanic, are you destined to have a dead dating life? Because after 5 months, it damn sure feels like it
I just came across this thread and I have to say to the OP, I 1000000% agree with EVERYTHING YOU SAID, and for all those saying it's not a race thing and/or discounting what you said, please ignore them because unless you are a black woman, you just don't understand. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE in the ways men approach other races of women, compared to black woman. Most men would quickly approach other races of women, before a black women. This has been my experience. I don't know if it's fear, belief that the black woman wouldn't want them or something else. I don't know, but it's disheartening.
I never had difficulty dating anywhere (I am African), until I came to the United States. Here it's like I am invincible and other races of men (which is what I see mostly in my daily life), don't hit on me, despite the fact that I get people saying "You are so pretty, why are you single?" or asking "Are you a model".
It used to make me feel really bad and months before I tried actively to move out of Indianapolis to improve my dating life. However, right now, that is on pause, since the recession is preventing my move. In the meantime, I have just decided to concentrate on other things and forget dating because even though I am open and would love to date any of the men I come across, if they are not asking me out, I'm just not going to force it.
And also, the place you live in has nothing to do with it. I lived in Maryland and currently Indianapolis and there were millions of men there, still it did not translate to a full dating life.
Last edited by Peacelilies; 05-19-2010 at 07:24 PM..
I just came across this thread and I have to say to the OP, I 1000000% agree with EVERYTHING YOU SAID, and for all those saying it's not a race thing and/or discounting what you said, please ignore them because unless you are a black woman, you just don't understand. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE in the ways men approach other races of women, compared to black woman. Most men would quickly approach other races of women, before a black women. This has been my experience. I don't know if it's fear, belief that the black woman wouldn't want them or something else. I don't know, but it's disheartening.
I never had difficulty dating anywhere (I am African), until I came to the United States. Here it's like I am invincible and other races of men (which is what I see mostly in my daily life), don't hit on me, despite the fact that I get people saying "You are so pretty, why are you single?" or asking "Are you a model".
It used to make me feel really bad and months before I tried actively to move out of Indianapolis to improve my dating life. However, right now, that is on pause, since the recession is preventing my move. In the meantime, I have just decided to concentrate on other things and forget dating because even though I am open and would love to date any of the men I come across, if they are not asking me out, I'm just not going to force it.
If things were so good in Africa then why are you single in America?
So if non black women don't understand what a black woman thinks then how are you, or the OP, going to understand why non black women are not chasing her?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
If things were so good in Africa then why are you single in America? 