Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I don't know anything about her situation. All I know is what she posts and what my response is to it, and recently at that.
Look, I've had a very hard life and especially the last few years. So have other people. I get that. I also know things can generally be worse. I mean, after all "I complained about having no shoes, and then I met a man who had no feet." I hate that analogy actually because it can negate the pain a person might feel if they have no shoes. It's fine to say to yourself I guess but not other people if that makes sense. I mean, I don't say it.
A few months ago, a friend of mine was discussing some frustrations in her life and she started crying, and then she said to me, "Oh my gosh, I am so sorry to burden you with these petty little things - after what you've gone through this past year! I am so, so sorry - you must think I am an idiot!" And I said to her, "No, I don't. I am so honored that you'd take me into your confidence. I figure we can always find someone who has it worse than us, but that doesn't mean we can't be frustrated to tears over something." Listen, I was at a freaking funeral one time - for a CHILD WHO HAD DIED IN A HOUSE FIRE - and I actually overheard the woman in front of me tell the mother, who was grieving her child OF COURSE, that she didn't have it so bad - this woman know someone who had lost FOUR KIDS in a house fire. NOT HELPFUL in my world.
Anyway, it's interesting to me how some people become very bitter and others not so much - maybe wiser, maybe more tender or whatever, but not necessarily more bitter.
I rather like the analogy, and have often thought along those lines when I go to my cardiologist's office. I am thankful that while I have some heart issues, I am so much better off than the majority of the people sitting in the waiting room, some of whom won't be around much longer, or will soon be in a nursing home environment. It also helps me be more helpful to my neighbor with Parkinson's Disease. There but for the grace of Buddha go I ().
that is a belief. or an excuse.
people in barfights use it. children on the playground use it. road ragers use it.
people unwilling to take responsibility for their own behavior use it.
many grown ups (most?) have a level of maturity where they don't use it.
Don't take analogies to extremes. There's a heck of a lot of difference between not being passive in terms of words and barfights and road rage.
You are still not answering a pretty simple straightforward question. I'm not talking about barfights.
I'm talking about being verbally attacked on city data.
If you are verbally attacked on city data, are you saying you don't defend yourself?
it's the same mindset. regarding how a person reacts, and justifies the knee-jerk reaction by blaming others, and not taking responsibility for our own thought, speech, actions, and feelings.
a knee jerk reaction is decidedly different from a consciously considered response.
it's the same mindset. regarding how a person reacts, and justifies the knee-jerk reaction by blaming others, and not taking responsibility for our own thought, speech, actions, and feelings.
a knee jerk reaction is decidedly different from a consciously chosen response.
Why can't you just answer the question?
If you are verbally attacked on city data forum, do you defend yourself or not?
That analogy makes no sense either to be honest. Apparently you should allow yourself to be beaten to pulp in a bar fight and not blame the other person because the other person started it. I have literally no idea what point is making at all.
I rather like the analogy, and have often thought along those lines when I go to my cardiologist's office. I am thankful that while I have some heart issues, I am so much better off than the majority of the people sitting in the waiting room, some of whom won't be around much longer, or will soon be in a nursing home environment. It also helps me be more helpful to my neighbor with Parkinson's Disease. There but for the grace of Buddha go I ().
I said it's fine to apply to ourselves - other people who are hurting don't generally want to hear us pontificate about it though. At least it hasn't been well received when I've heard people say it. See above example of the woman at the funeral who told a GRIEVING MOTHER WHO HAD LOST A CHILD IN A HOUSE FIRE that she shouldn't feel so bad - she knew someone who had lost FOUR children in a house fire!
Yep, things can always be worse I guess but I don't generally point that out to someone who is grieving or hurting. I commiserate with them. It could be me next time - in fact, it HAS been me.
You know - I just thought losing my husband and my job and my life as a woman married to a vibrant, funny, intelligent, good looking man was bad enough. But no, things can get worse -ask me how I know! Of course things can get worse, and sometimes they DO get worse. And still - I could have been even worse off, though I think I was bad enough off as it was and then some. But I didn't want to hear from other people about how it could be worse. Of course it could be worse. I mean, I could have had no insurance. I could have had to go back to work after a few days and then after I broke my dominant arm I could have had to take unpaid leave. I could have had complications from the surgery. All sorts of terrible things could have happened to me but didn't. Still...things were bad enough as it was. I was able to be thankful they weren't worse on my own, without someone telling me that (especially from a comfort zone). I mean, they were bad enough, and then they got a lot worse. And things still aren't comfortable for me and maybe they never will be again, who knows? But hey, they could be worse!
I actually know this and that's why I am thankful every single day of my life for what I have, and even for what I've been through. But it still doesn't make it easy to go through.
Yes, because what you are saying makes no sense. And you STILL haven't answered the question. If you are verbally attacked on city data do you defend yourself or not?
that would be a good thread topic.
perhaps that would be the avenue to pursue the question, since this thread we are in is on prayer.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
).
