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My wife and I are so disappointed in the verbalized financial expectations of our kids, that we are considering a re-write of our Trust Doc to leave our Estate to our favorite charities. The kids would still receive the death benefit of a sizeable Survivorship Life Insurance Policy which is fully paid for. But the rest of the money would do public good.
No more $1K/night hotel rooms or $250 bottles of Dom Perignon from 'our' money. They already did that with the money we provided them to:
• Pay off Graduate School Student loans (we paid all of Undergrad), or
• Be a down payment on a house to escape sky high rents, or
• Kick start their own retirement accounts.
We were always open and honest with them regarding our finances. We falsely assumed they would learn good financial habits via assimilation of these discussion topics.
Nope!
I don’t know how they grew up, but I grew up somewhere between working and middle class, and while I didn’t spend anything like they seem to, I’ve spent a lot on travel and fine dining. It’s one of the few things I don’t regret spending on, within reason. You can’t always get back those cool experiences, or the time you did them in.
Until I was 25, I hadn’t been west of Nashville, south of Orlando, or north of DC, having grown up in TN.
I don’t know how they grew up, but I grew up somewhere between working and middle class, and while I didn’t spend anything like they seem to, I’ve spent a lot on travel and fine dining. It’s one of the few things I don’t regret spending on, within reason. You can’t always get back those cool experiences, or the time you did them in.
Until I was 25, I hadn’t been west of Nashville, south of Orlando, or north of DC, having grown up in TN.
Our 23 year old son has seen more of this country than I have. He's taken lots of trips both by car and by plane and he's paid for them with his own money. Yep, he could have saved all of that money and maybe even bought himself a house for what he's spent on travel. But at 23, he doesn't know where he'll want to settle down, yet. He could have put that money away for retirement. But, instead, he has memories and experiences that will last a lifetime.
I actually think it's kind of cool what he has done and sort of wish I had done more of the same when I was his age. It gets much harder to do once you're married with kids.
Our 23 year old son has seen more of this country than I have. He's taken lots of trips both by car and by plane and he's paid for them with his own money. Yep, he could have saved all of that money and maybe even bought himself a house for what he's spent on travel. But at 23, he doesn't know where he'll want to settle down, yet. He could have put that money away for retirement. But, instead, he has memories and experiences that will last a lifetime.
I actually think it's kind of cool what he has done and sort of wish I had done more of the same when I was his age. It gets much harder to do once you're married with kids.
My thing is that you only get one shot at life. So many people defer things to retirement age, then don't make it to that age, are so infirm that they cannot do it, or have so many obligations that they cannot get away from that those dreams never happen. They miss out completely on stuff that would have been easy to do at a younger age.
I bunnyhopped up a bank from the driveway Sunday to throw sticks for the dog. I felt my calf pop. Medial gastrocnemius tear. I've been in an orthopedic boot most of the time since. I'm fine to get around my house without it, but I can't walk very far. In saying that, last Sunday I was on a walker, and this Sunday I'm moving around the house under my own power.
It does make you think for "future contingency," and I've certainly made mistakes in my life, but I'm doing fairly well now.
I suppose a group of seniors here on the Retirement board could band together and purchase an ALF. I suspect staff would treat owners with special care.
I don’t know how they grew up, but I grew up somewhere between working and middle class, and while I didn’t spend anything like they seem to, I’ve spent a lot on travel and fine dining. It’s one of the few things I don’t regret spending on, within reason. You can’t always get back those cool experiences, or the time you did them in.
Until I was 25, I hadn’t been west of Nashville, south of Orlando, or north of DC, having grown up in TN.
But you were spending your OWN money on travel, etc, not your parents'. If an adult child wastes parents' money that should've been money to get out of debt, or put a down payment on a home, on luxuries they certainly don't need, then it's a slap in the face to their parents, and they should expect the same in return when it's time to read the will.
My thing is that you only get one shot at life. So many people defer things to retirement age, then don't make it to that age, are so infirm that they cannot do it, or have so many obligations that they cannot get away from that those dreams never happen. They miss out completely on stuff that would have been easy to do at a younger age.
I bunnyhopped up a bank from the driveway Sunday to throw sticks for the dog. I felt my calf pop. Medial gastrocnemius tear. I've been in an orthopedic boot most of the time since. I'm fine to get around my house without it, but I can't walk very far. In saying that, last Sunday I was on a walker, and this Sunday I'm moving around the house under my own power.
It does make you think for "future contingency," and I've certainly made mistakes in my life, but I'm doing fairly well now.
Ugh, I'm sorry that you got injured. But, yep, even at the age of 37 you aren't a kid anymore and can be more prone to injuring yourself.
I do regret putting off travel as long as I have. I wish I had fit more adventures in when I was younger. I plan to make up for lost time but, let's face it, I do not have the stamina to keep going and going like I used to.
When I hear my kid talk about all of the things that he manages to fit in during a couple of days it is amazing to me how much ground he covers, how much he sees, how he goes nonstop - I remember having that kind of energy when I was younger. That constant nonstop pace would exhaust me now.
So definitely do things while you are still young.
Age 72, took my first trip overseas, 15 hour flight. On a tour 10 days.
Road Scholar offers a variety of tours by interests, as well as actively levels. The tour (Charleston, SC) 2 days by the tour, Wednesday, on our own (numerous suggestions), then 2 days easy tour again. Saturday departure. Seemed to short ! History, food, vibe ? all so interesting. Sometimes I wondered what century I was living, time travel !
Ugh, I'm sorry that you got injured. But, yep, even at the age of 37 you aren't a kid anymore and can be more prone to injuring yourself.
I do regret putting off travel as long as I have. I wish I had fit more adventures in when I was younger. I plan to make up for lost time but, let's face it, I do not have the stamina to keep going and going like I used to.
When I hear my kid talk about all of the things that he manages to fit in during a couple of days it is amazing to me how much ground he covers, how much he sees, how he goes nonstop - I remember having that kind of energy when I was younger. That constant nonstop pace would exhaust me now.
So definitely do things while you are still young.
I concur with that, although I am not sure it is a matter of energy (my energy is still the same as when I was young - if anything, I am far less affected by jetlag now than I was when I was young, maybe because now there is melatonin available ). I think new impressions are much stronger, and turn into stronger lifelong memories, when one is young. Although I think it's still better to travel even in the old age than never travel at all. Anyway, if I had kids, I'd be ok with them blowing some of my money on travel, provided that they pursued budget travel and were responsible about school. If they did well in school, they would be able to earn enough money on their own for all those other "serious" things later (home, retirement, whatever). But I don't have kids, so should probably just shut up :-).
Among the children of my first cousins (ie, my closest relatives in the next generation after mine, since neither I nor my sibling have kids), the one who did best in school, and then in her career, was also the one who spent most time and money on travel when she was younger. She is 40 now, married to a great guy, has a little boy, will probably go for one more kid.
Age 72, took my first trip overseas, 15 hour flight. On a tour 10 days.
Road Scholar offers a variety of tours by interests, as well as actively levels. The tour (Charleston, SC) 2 days by the tour, Wednesday, on our own (numerous suggestions), then 2 days easy tour again. Saturday departure. Seemed to short ! History, food, vibe ? all so interesting. Sometimes I wondered what century I was living, time travel !
I dislike guided tours, but I think I'll probably give a twirl to Road Scholar. Their catalog looks great.
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). I think new impressions are much stronger, and turn into stronger lifelong memories, when one is young. Although I think it's still better to travel even in the old age than never travel at all. Anyway, if I had kids, I'd be ok with them blowing some of my money on travel, provided that they pursued budget travel and were responsible about school. If they did well in school, they would be able to earn enough money on their own for all those other "serious" things later (home, retirement, whatever). But I don't have kids, so should probably just shut up :-).
