Why Tampa Sucks (Miami, Orlando, Clearwater: houses, buy, inspections)

[TheFlyingDutchman]

So here I go.

There are two big reasons why Tampa sucks.

1) The first one is: Tampa traffic lights.

For decades and decades now, Tampa traffic lights are pretty much unique across everywhere else in the country in that the corrupt clique of families that completely controls Tampa politics and government, has adamantly refused to install traffic sensors on any of the intersection lights, so that the length of the lights change in response to the flow or amount of traffic waiting at the intersection.

As a result, pretty much anyone who's driven around Tampa for more than a few hours -- and many people have lived in Tampa all their lives, as have their parents, and their parents' parents -- discovers that no matter whether it's high noon or four in the morning, if they get caught at a Tampa traffic light and there are NO other cars on the road, or if there are a trillion, that light is going to make them sit there and wait for a FULL FIVE MINUTES before even thinking about changing, no matter what.

And so, what does this compel people to do in Tampa? Yes, that's right -- speed through the intersections. Otherwise, they know they're going to just be sitting there for a FULL FIVE MINUTES, no matter what.

So what you end up with, is a city full of people running through red lights, speeding through intersections and hitting other cars and pedestrians, and generally being much more stressed out and agitated than they otherwise would be, if the power clique of families that rules Tampa government actually gave a damn about the rest of the people there.

If the Tampa power clique o' families actually gave a damn about the people of Tampa, they would have spent at least SOME money to install at least SOME traffic light sensors at SOME of the intersections to start with, and then install more as more money came available -- after all, they've had many, many decades to do this, but no.

So, what DOES the Tampa ruling clique have the inclination to do? Instead of spending money on traffic sensors, they spent money on evil and punitive cameras to catch people running the red lights.

This way, they not only get to sadistically keep the people of Tampa as miserable and stressed-out as possible, but they also get to put a LOT of extra money from all those traffic fines and even arrests, into their pockets (and some into the city Treasury, of course).

So, to recap, the clique that controls Tampa is not in the mood to make life easier and more efficient for the already-stressed-out people of Tampa by modifying Tampa traffic lights so that they adjust to difference in traffic flows, like every halfway-civilized town in America has done for decades now, but they are in the mood to be both sadistic and predatory, and instead put up "Gotcha!" intersection cameras to catch "the bad guys" as they understandably try to race through the yellow lights in order to make anything remotely approximating good time.

And that's just reason number one of why Tampa sucks.

[TheFlyingDutchman]

Reason Number Two:

2) Just on the west side of the Tampa Airport, there is a tangled jumble of interchanges criss-crossing at high speed, with some pointing to Clearwater, and some to this memorial highway or that highway, and that one little Mongolian cluster-%#(& of interchanges all happens within not even one square mile.

And so, in classic Tampa tradition, do you think that the local government would care to put accurate and frequent directional signage in that area, to alleviate confusion and people accidentally taking the wrong interchange?

Nope! They put a sign in one location, that says you need to be going in this lane or this direction to catch this memorial highway, and then when you actually do as the sign says and follow the instruction, you find out that -- whoopsie doopsie! -- the actual exit is on the OTHER side of that high-speed concrete embankment that you now cannot simply plow through at 55 mph, in order to get to where you actually WERE trying to go.

So where are you now going? Well, who knows? Clearwater? Nome, Alaska? Mordor? Your guess is as good as mine. And, ya know what?

The Tampa gub'mint clique could not care less. They've no doubt also been informed of this problem, too, for decades now, and they just could not care one iota less to spend even a penny to move the signs to where they really belong, or even to spend a little more money on more directional signs, to help the citizens and visitors of Tampa.

And that is the second reason why Tampa, Florida, sucks.

[jambo101]

I guess if thats the way you feel about Tampa its government and its traffic lights i guess Tampa would indeed suck,But mostly its just about perspective. personally i am extra cautious when coming to an intersection and if the light turns red i stop.That whole area around the airport is a spaghetti junction for motorists however its well marked and i've never had a problem coming from St Pete and hooking up with the Suncoast Parkway.
And driving around the Tampa Bay area i've never given a moments thought to the corrupt clique of families that completely controls Tampa politics and government.
so FlyingDutchman obviously the Tampa traffic mosaic and the government behind it has you a bit stressed out,i doubt maintaining that attitude will affect the traffic or the government one bit and may over the long term affect your heart,so next time you are feeling stressed out think of cool breezes flowing over your favorite beach,imagine you are there for a moment watching a beautiful sunset and basking in the nice warm weather and how fortunate you are to live in a place such as Tampa.
May you find Peace and tranquility.

[stpeteguy]

Just slow down and obey the traffic laws and you'll be much happier. I've never seen someone so stressed over traffic stuff.

[HWTechGuy]

Originally Posted by stpeteguy

Just slow down and obey the traffic laws and you'll be much happier. I've never seen someone so stressed over traffic stuff.

I have - my baby sister who is still afraid to drive most places at age 31.

[CSD610]

There is a very easy solution to your traffic stress issue, move out of Tampa and go somewhere else where they have the exact same traffic issues. Even though the traffic issues are the same at least you won't be in Tampa.

It is possible the clique in Tampa does not want to change anything until everyone in Tampa learns how to spell
"Government" properly.

[PhotoProIP]

If you think Tampa sucks! (which is preposterous), you haven't lived in Orlando or Miami yet! Do us all a favor and stop this nonsense threads, and go live there for a while before making such ridiculous comments about Tampa...As soon as you hit West Palm Beach you are in driving hell! Tampa is a little baby compared to that! Also, if you think drivers are crazy here, it's probably because you're not respecting traffic rules. See the other thread on this, or the other tens of thousands of threads on this.

If you want to talk about "stop lights" you might have not been to NYC, DC, PA, CHI....If you are referring to South Tampa traffic lights, please also refer to how congested south Tampa is at any given time a day....I drive through there occasionally and it is awful, but I have't yet been there where there are no cars anywhere!

Those interchanges didn't exist back in 2003, and I for one am extremely happy all of that is finally OVER! I love it. I don't know what you're talking about...there are signs everywhere! Big signs, and there's also GPS for those who can't read signs and have to be walked by hand with directions!

[PhotoProIP]

What is the purpose of this rant? If you don't like it move, or email the Government! We're not the Government here...email your representative...I am sure they would love to hear these types of opinions!

[Red3311]

NO, this is the REAL reason why Tampa sucks...

So you want to open a Northern Mongolian restaruant huh? Good idea since there is only Applebees and Chilis around; it should be a hit. So after months of planning you finally decide on a spot, buy the land and decide you are going to build this awesome new restaraunt within the city limits...k great....

Well after months and months of red tape and BS you are finally "granted" a permit that approves the restaraunt (please note this does not include the actual permit to build, lol) then after waiting another five months you get the build permit...wow finally! So, you are bulilding along, but guess what the city now is sending 8 or 9 "engineers" by to make sure everything is up to code. 12-18 months later you finally pass ALL inspections...you still need the business, liquor and multiple other licenses. Finally, after all this BS you finally open and things are going pretty decent even if you know it will take you a couple years to recoup money from the time it took you to finally get everything approived to build... but wait! the 3 crack houses behind you have decided to complain about your patio area becuase "its to noisy" after 8pm on a Saturday, so the county tells you to shut it down and you just lost 30% of your business.

This is why Tampa sucks and why you will never see any real growth and why it will never be "big city status"

[tinytrump]

I am out of Miami, and the lights are synchronized there, much more than I have ever seen here. Was talking to my boss about that yest, the traffic people in this area, need to be brought up to par, but I wonder IF some idiots yelled NO -NO,, too much money,,, let them live elsewhere,,, we dont need more traffic... hmmm? I see people everyday get stuck in the V- not sure if they go to memorial or the beaches or the vets,,, idiot,, go forth and get off the next exit and back track!!! the same for any road, you missed it,,, keep going and turn around, oh nooo, we are owners of the road, let everybody else come to a complete stop, so I can go on my merry way. - It is a known fact, not unlike other cities, we have NOT kept up wth the abundace of autos. Tampa period is NOt ready for the influx of new people and so welcome to the grid lock... but for me, I will never ask you to go live elsewhere. Do complain to the RIGHT people, and from what I see the mayor is working very hard at changing things. BUT i do think you should see who needs that vote - or NOt at the next election.