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I like when the kids at summer camp come up for hugs and we are a family environment there, so nobody bats an eye, but I can see how it would be considered awkward at public school, especially since I wouldn't hug all the kids, so it would be somehow considered playing favorites too which I wouldn't do. That's not necessarily an impulse of mine though, I just didn't like being told that I shouldn't do that because I'm a man. Any policy on that should apply to everyone.
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Originally Posted by Coney
In my experience, women are held to the same standards.
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Originally Posted by Enrico_Fermi
Yeah, but in a prior post awhile back I mentioned about being told specifically I should never hug any kids because I'm a man, but she does it because she is a woman.
Your female supervisor was incorrect. She should not be hugging middle school students, either.
In all of the school districts around here, elementary level teachers, whether male or female DO NOT hug students (except for rare occasions - like they are hurt or crying), and maybe kindergarten level children at dismissal time.
Middle & high school teachers NEVER, EVER hug students.
Autism isn't an excuse, but the behaviors are often impulsive, which means the awareness isn't there until after the fact, and if you think just because someone with autism is aware of their behavior that their disorder is unrelated to it, then you don't know anyone with autism really well.
Getting revenge the way you are talking about requires forethought and a plan....none of that is impulsive and thus you can learn to self-soothe so you no longer are a slave to your desire for revenge.
Yeah, but in a prior post awhile back I mentioned about being told specifically I should never hug any kids because I'm a man, but she does it because she is a woman.
You may not like it, but because their is a perception on the part of parents that men are more likely to take advantage of the students, you should be aware of that. Men are just more likely to be accused of improprieties. It's not necessarily true that they are more likely to be improper, but they are more likely to be accused.
Note that the woman teacher should not be hugging students either, but that she is perceived as less threatening by the parents. It's not fair, but it is the way things are.
In middle school, no one should be hugging their students nor should they be in high school. Sometimes in the primary grades prek to 3, I can see children needing hugging, but even then most schools have policies against it.
I didn't hug any of the students. It was just the way she put it that sounded prejudiced to me. I personally don't see the problem with it though. Adults give short hugs all the time so if it were the last day of school or something I don't know why people would freak out over that. It's not really that big of an issue for me to try and press though.
Honestly, the hugging thing got hashed out ad nauseum on the original thread. Is it really necessary to have another one that's just going to be a duplication of the exact same discussion?
OP, if you spend your days of student teaching assignments aggressively looking around for all the ways you think you can make a case for people discriminating against you for either your disability or your sexual orientation, you are probably not spending a whole lot of time actually focusing on your practicum and learning how to teach. Consider the fact that you have been released from your assignment for the time being and reflect on the reasons for that.
Do you really need a thread to hash out the differences between teaching kids between the ages of 11-14 and teaching kids between the ages of 18-23? Is developmental psychology not something that you were introduced to prior to student teaching? It seems unlikely. You note in your OP that you have the relevant background to understand the differences. But your original post also further indicates what other threads you've started have unanimously illustrated: That your M.O. in your teacher preparation is to highlight and expose all the things you think all other teachers get wrong, and show everyone the right way of doing things.
Do you think this is going to help you achieve what I am assuming is your goal of working in the field? Or do you think that you may want to spend some time learning from others? Every single post of yours is nothing but all the things you don't agree with in the field you for whatever reason want to go into, and how you, as an inexperienced college student, know best, even if nobody else in the field sees it. What outcome do you foresee, here? I'm legitimately asking.
See, this is wh I ask this on an anonymous forum and not in person, because people assume that means I don't know the differences. My post was mostly about teachers who abuse and take advantage of those differences by not respecting their students.
And no, I don't care to discuss the hugging issue any further, my final position though is people are saying I should change the way I act to conform to society gender bias, and I say thanks, but no thanks. I'll take my chances.
See, this is wh I ask this on an anonymous forum and not in person, because people assume that means I don't know the differences. My post was mostly about teachers who abuse and take advantage of those differences by not respecting their students.
Which is an entirely different topic than "Differences between college classroom and grade school classroom."
You've been pretty open about the fact that you consider many, if not most, behavioral expectations, structure, and rules put into place in learning environments to be abusive and disrespectful. The fact that you read abusive agendas into things such as requiring permission to roam the halls unsupervised and similar is something that is going to prove to be a hindrance for you, should you be able to progress toward a career in the classroom.
Running an K-12 classroom with a different degree of structure than a college-level program is not abuse. It's not an indicator of disrespect. It wouldn't be appropriate to hold a 12-year old to the same standards as a 22-year old, in nearly any situation. Hell, I've taught 21-year olds with the social-emotional development of 8-10 year olds, predominantly folks with Down Syndrome. Even at that rate, I still treat them like the adults they are, in any context where it is appropriate and safe to do so.
The fact that you consider all feedback (including people repeating back to you things you have said) to be insulting, both here and when given by the people who are observing you in person and training you, is probably a big part of the problem you are experiencing.
It is going to be very important for you, no matter WHAT field you end up seeking employment in, to be able to handle the fact that performance feedback, correction, improvement plans, etc. are not personal slams, insults, or indictments of your character. They are simply points for improvement or increased understanding. Every time someone disagrees with you or presents something with which you don't agree, you appear take it as a personal dig and an opportunity to argue. This has been an issue for many of my students with higher functioning autism as well, when preparing to enter the workforce, and it presents a significant barricade to achieving goals, to be honest. It's not going to come easily to you to break these patterns, but you will find that you have more success in a workplace if you do not jump on the defensive each time you are given feedback with which you might disagree.
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