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I think it might be a little easier if you are from this area. For instance, I never expected to have a single family home (and I don't). And I've never known what it is like to not have traffic so I don't expect to go 20 miles in 20 minutes. I think generally, the above posters have got it right. If you want a quiet, affordable, warm life you probably won't like it. But if you are ambitious, and always want to do new things, you just might love it here. Most people make friends eventually. One thing that hasn't been mentioned is the amazing education opportunities here. There are so many cool things to specialize in and so many schools that you can attend.
I personally love this area and am sorry that I am moving.
I think it might be a little easier if you are from this area. For instance, I never expected to have a single family home (and I don't). And I've never known what it is like to not have traffic so I don't expect to go 20 miles in 20 minutes. I think generally, the above posters have got it right. If you want a quiet, affordable, warm life you probably won't like it. But if you are ambitious, and always want to do new things, you just might love it here. Most people make friends eventually. One thing that hasn't been mentioned is the amazing education opportunities here. There are so many cool things to specialize in and so many schools that you can attend.
I personally love this area and am sorry that I am moving.
It's all and good while you're young. I've discovered, as the years have gone by, I want more than pieces of paper certifying my knowledge, and the status of a well paying career, and even the cachet or cool that living in such a "happening" place has to offer.
There comes a time when formal education reaches its end - and learning by doing is more efficient. And even then, there is another level beyond that where one becomes satisfied with one's place in life such that one realizes that the rat race, really isn't a race at all, and the truth that he who dies with the most toys, still dies. That "happening" place turns out to be the same 3 roads that get you to work, where you spend far to much time (working and getting there) - and that your daily routines really aren't so "happening". Oh, sure, there's that once a year embassy dinner... once a year. Or maybe those museums you've been to 100 times that you haven't gone to in 2 years. Cherry blossoms? Very nice - in a few years those words take on a new meaning: "avoid the area, its going to be swamped with people".
I only recently came to realize that the hyper-ambition of this area really doesn't make for the greatest life. I was one of the rats. Perhaps it was my first child's birth only last year that shook me out of it. I discovered that the things that make up my daily life, are none of the things I find special about living in DC.
Suddenly you realize, you don't give a rats arse about that career so long as it provides you the means to provide for your family comfortably - and you want more than a postage stamp to live on... but moreover, you discover that every second spent at work is a second not spent with your family. Suddenly all one's ambition, and all of one's accomplishments become hollow in the light of those long hours put in at work.
But even further, when one looks really closely - one sees that all that effort really amounted to swiming upstream and those long hours and strong ambition still only landed you a postage stamp in Washington DC - DC, a city whose allure is more about status and glamour than any reasonable thought. More about pride I think than anything else. "I live in Washington DC, this place is special."
Meanwhile Bubba, a blue collar guy in Meridian Mississippi works fewer hours, makes far less money, owns far more land, a decent house and a fishing boat... Meanwhile the rats in the DC race scurry for a $400,000 condo, and a significant portion of life spent waiting... in traffic, on the metro... and working their ambitious little butts off to do it. Then they scoff at hillybilly Bubba and his backward ways.
The more I think about it, the more I think I'll take my southern town with its one mall (with the same stores as the 5 I move away from), its two theaters (with the same movies as the 50 I move away from), its 2 museums (that one visits as sparingly as the smithsonian) and its own charming places, albeit different from those of the big city. When I need the city, I'll travel there. The amount I save by not living there affords me the ability to fly in when I want to see that event at the Kennedy Center... or give my kids a tour of the monuments. But as for day to day life... for a 30 year old such as myself, not much changes other than less time in traffic, and fewer rats.
I'll sit on my southern porch looking over my nice country yard, sip my sweet tea, and I won't shed one tear for that Washington DC condo.
DC is a fine place to start a life, but a poor place to live a life.
Just my opinion of course. I've seen it from both sides now.
Last edited by DvlsAdvc8; 04-01-2008 at 09:02 PM..
DC is known as the "Big ****ty," oddly enough folks from down south, including my grandfather, "The Hatch", also thought it was hard to settle in the best land-all near Nashville. It is always tough for folks from a new area to settle into unknown territory, but it always happens. The "Big ****ty" is just a term for, "wow I didn't think this town could get even ****tier than its surface." The bright side though is that, well, it all gets ****tier the deeper you dig, and I didn't make that part up.....
It's all and good while you're young. I've discovered, as the years have gone by, I want more than pieces of paper certifying my knowledge, and the status of a well paying career, and even the cachet or cool that living in such a "happening" place has to offer.
There comes a time when formal education reaches its end - and learning by doing is more efficient. And even then, there is another level beyond that where one becomes satisfied with one's place in life such that one realizes that the rat race, really isn't a race at all, and the truth that he who dies with the most toys, still dies. That "happening" place turns out to be the same 3 roads that get you to work, where you spend far to much time (working and getting there) - and that your daily routines really aren't so "happening". Oh, sure, there's that once a year embassy dinner... once a year. Or maybe those museums you've been to 100 times that you haven't gone to in 2 years. Cherry blossoms? Very nice - in a few years those words take on a new meaning: "avoid the area, its going to be swamped with people".
I only recently came to realize that the hyper-ambition of this area really doesn't make for the greatest life. I was one of the rats. Perhaps it was my first child's birth only last year that shook me out of it. I discovered that the things that make up my daily life, are none of the things I find special about living in DC.
Suddenly you realize, you don't give a rats arse about that career so long as it provides you the means to provide for your family comfortably - and you want more than a postage stamp to live on... but moreover, you discover that every second spent at work is a second not spent with your family. Suddenly all one's ambition, and all of one's accomplishments become hollow in the light of those long hours put in at work.
But even further, when one looks really closely - one sees that all that effort really amounted to swiming upstream and those long hours and strong ambition still only landed you a postage stamp in Washington DC - DC, a city whose allure is more about status and glamour than any reasonable thought. More about pride I think than anything else. "I live in Washington DC, this place is special."
Meanwhile Bubba, a blue collar guy in Meridian Mississippi works fewer hours, makes far less money, owns far more land, a decent house and a fishing boat... Meanwhile the rats in the DC race scurry for a $400,000 condo, and a significant portion of life spent waiting... in traffic, on the metro... and working their ambitious little butts off to do it. Then they scoff at hillybilly Bubba and his backward ways.
The more I think about it, the more I think I'll take my southern town with its one mall (with the same stores as the 5 I move away from), its two theaters (with the same movies as the 50 I move away from), its 2 museums (that one visits as sparingly as the smithsonian) and its own charming places, albeit different from those of the big city. When I need the city, I'll travel there. The amount I save by not living there affords me the ability to fly in when I want to see that event at the Kennedy Center... or give my kids a tour of the monuments. But as for day to day life... for a 30 year old such as myself, not much changes other than less time in traffic, and fewer rats.
I'll sit on my southern porch looking over my nice country yard, sip my sweet tea, and I won't shed one tear for that Washington DC condo.
DC is a fine place to start a life, but a poor place to live a life.
Just my opinion of course. I've seen it from both sides now.
...think that you summed it up best. Getting married for me did it. I knew then that it was time to go. The wife and I are looking at Henry County GA. It is close enough to the city of Atlanta but far enough from it... In addition, one can still buy that home with some land and sip on "real" sweet tea.....
the big city/smaller town argument comes down to people and how you like to interact in society. Smaller cities and towns are pretty boring and entertainment often involves talking about everybody else in town. The bulk of the place will be people who grew up there and have known each other for a long time. There is often a feeling of trying to keep things "the same as they've always been" and a shortage of people willing to embrace and work for new ideas or changes. People typically don't change in smaller towns and cities.
On the other hand there is a type of person who is fairly dynamic in their interests and finds the matters of other people boring and/or rude to talk about. They want to have interesting conversations with new, different people as much as possible. To be near and able to experience the cutting edge of a human culture has more appeal to these people. Sometimes they are a part of it sometimes they are spectators. The big city attracts ambition but not just economic ambition. Spiritual and intellectual ambition also flocks to the city. Adventurous souls who crave newness flock to certain cities of the USA and the world.
The question for any city dweller after a few years rears its head and while it starts as a question about "this town" ultimately it is a question about you yourself. Who are you and what do you want your day-to-day life to consist of? The truth is that 100,000 people move to a big, "cool" city over a few years and ten years later only 25,000 of them are still there. The commonly heard reasons such as "housing prices" for example are basically the cry of people who are in the wrong place. If your life really does consist of three streets, shopping in some stores and the misery of being trapped in a little box you have two choices: Adapt by changing the way you live or adapt by living somewhere else.
You have a tremendous way with words... any US city or town would, I think, have to agree with a few of your descriptions like those below which are sooo universal *and funny*
Quote:
Originally Posted by DvlsAdvc8
----That "happening" place turns out to be the same 3 roads that get you to work, where you spend far to much time
---- Cherry blossoms? Very nice - in a few years those words take on a new meaning: "avoid the area, its going to be swamped with people".
It's a beautiful thing when citizens say enough is enough to the rat race, and I feel this way b/c of the children. Congrats and all the best to you!
Wow, interesting insights for this one, too. I'm seeing a pattern here, that the debate isn't small or big town? but small or big thinking. For the types you describe, I've found in both small and big cities/towns. I'm in a big city now with MANY small thinking folk and I'm considering a small town now with some on this forum from there who sound extremely gifted - intellectually and socially.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NorthernCalifornia
---On the other hand there is a type of person who is fairly dynamic in their interests and finds the matters of other people boring and/or rude to talk about.
I would agree, though, that this is not at all exclusive to small towns. Not, as I said above, where I live in AZ. There are many of this type in big cities b/c they, well, for starters didn't listen to their parents growing up who were trying to instill decency and respect in their kids. I used to be in childcare, so I remember. Those bad habits start very incredibly early.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NorthernCalifornia
---The commonly heard reasons such as "housing prices" for example are basically the cry of people who are in the wrong place.
---If your life really does consist of three streets, shopping in some stores and the misery of being trapped in a little box you have two choices: Adapt by changing the way you live or adapt by living somewhere else.
I would have to disagree that the fault of this lies exclusively with the individual b/c I think these two are unfair and unestablished generalizations about people in the midst of such struggles. There are just too many factors involved. Should, however, an individual notice they're in them [these struggles] they don't necessarily need to disclose it to us, but the fact that they do confess such tells me they have much more integrity than you are suggesting.
You have a tremendous way with words... any US city or town would, I think, have to agree with a few of your descriptions like those below which are sooo universal *and funny*
It's a beautiful thing when citizens say enough is enough to the rat race, and I feel this way b/c of the children. Congrats and all the best to you!
...I agree. I think that there is a point in a person's life where he or she realizes, there is just so much MORE to life than going to work everyday or seeing how many throats he or she can cut on the way to the top of the corporate ladder. To the poster who stated, that lower home prices are a cry for being in the wrong place, for the reasons I stated above, I am glad to be crying this morning.
I think the big/little city subject comes down to where you are in life as opposed to what kind of person you are.
There are a myriad of things to like about the city, and just as many knocks on it. However, when I did my own personal inventory of what I liked about the city, it turned out that they were things that didn't really show up much in my day to day life any longer. Who wants to live for "occassionally"? When it comes down to it, and this applies even to my friends who still love the city, their day to day lives are loaded with the things that make city life poorer and they accept it for the sprinkling of things that make city life rewarding. The most common subjects of converstation aren't embassy dinners, its how long you spent in traffic yesterday because of the accident on such and such road. Look closely and all of our lives pretty much cover the same couple roads and regularly visited stores. The vast majority of our time is spent at work or at home. I hear how "interesting" the city is all the time, but yet its difficult for anyone in the city to own a boat or any sort of rv. I'd say weekends spent on the boat are a bit more interesting than weekends hanging out in Adam's Morgan. Not to mention you can't exactly "entertain" friends very well out of that 600 sq ft place you've got in DC. Forget about backyard barbecues.
I was very eager to get here only a few years back, and now I'm just as eager to get out of here.
On the subject of people: people are people, no matter where they are. Sure, rural people are more in your business - ironically not because they want to tick you off or be rude. In a smaller town, ironically, its easier to know more people... and they really do want to know you. Its funny actually, in DC you are surrounded by thousands of "interesting" people - and yet its one of the hardest places to meet people I've ever lived. Getting to know someone well is even harder. If people in the country are in your business, than people in the city are more dismissive of one another. It's like the more people there are, the less one person is worth.
It was definitely having my first kid that changed this place for me. I have several 30-something friends who still haven't had kids or who have chosen to never have kids. That blows my mind. I can't think of anything more integral to truly living life than being a parent... being a grandparent. I guess for me, I woke up one day and realized that I had my values misplaced. The best way I can describe it is to say "I grew up" (not intending to be condescending).
You spend your early life wishing life would speed up; Faster and faster and faster. More interesting, more exciting, more dynamic! And the rest of your life wishing it would slow down.
I don't regret my time here. It's just time to move on.
It's all and good while you're young. I've discovered, as the years have gone by, I want more than pieces of paper certifying my knowledge, and the status of a well paying career, and even the cachet or cool that living in such a "happening" place has to offer.
There comes a time when formal education reaches its end - and learning by doing is more efficient. And even then, there is another level beyond that where one becomes satisfied with one's place in life such that one realizes that the rat race, really isn't a race at all, and the truth that he who dies with the most toys, still dies. That "happening" place turns out to be the same 3 roads that get you to work, where you spend far to much time (working and getting there) - and that your daily routines really aren't so "happening". Oh, sure, there's that once a year embassy dinner... once a year. Or maybe those museums you've been to 100 times that you haven't gone to in 2 years. Cherry blossoms? Very nice - in a few years those words take on a new meaning: "avoid the area, its going to be swamped with people".
I only recently came to realize that the hyper-ambition of this area really doesn't make for the greatest life. I was one of the rats. Perhaps it was my first child's birth only last year that shook me out of it. I discovered that the things that make up my daily life, are none of the things I find special about living in DC.
Suddenly you realize, you don't give a rats arse about that career so long as it provides you the means to provide for your family comfortably - and you want more than a postage stamp to live on... but moreover, you discover that every second spent at work is a second not spent with your family. Suddenly all one's ambition, and all of one's accomplishments become hollow in the light of those long hours put in at work.
But even further, when one looks really closely - one sees that all that effort really amounted to swiming upstream and those long hours and strong ambition still only landed you a postage stamp in Washington DC - DC, a city whose allure is more about status and glamour than any reasonable thought. More about pride I think than anything else. "I live in Washington DC, this place is special."
Meanwhile Bubba, a blue collar guy in Meridian Mississippi works fewer hours, makes far less money, owns far more land, a decent house and a fishing boat... Meanwhile the rats in the DC race scurry for a $400,000 condo, and a significant portion of life spent waiting... in traffic, on the metro... and working their ambitious little butts off to do it. Then they scoff at hillybilly Bubba and his backward ways.
The more I think about it, the more I think I'll take my southern town with its one mall (with the same stores as the 5 I move away from), its two theaters (with the same movies as the 50 I move away from), its 2 museums (that one visits as sparingly as the smithsonian) and its own charming places, albeit different from those of the big city. When I need the city, I'll travel there. The amount I save by not living there affords me the ability to fly in when I want to see that event at the Kennedy Center... or give my kids a tour of the monuments. But as for day to day life... for a 30 year old such as myself, not much changes other than less time in traffic, and fewer rats.
I'll sit on my southern porch looking over my nice country yard, sip my sweet tea, and I won't shed one tear for that Washington DC condo.
DC is a fine place to start a life, but a poor place to live a life.
Just my opinion of course. I've seen it from both sides now.
***DUSTYBUTT STANDS AND CLAPS DELIBERATELY***
Here! Here!
I've lived around in both small towns and big cities. The best fit for me is a town in between, and its not for lack of ambition or skill. I make pretty good cake here and have the respect of my peers. But this place isn't all that. Sure... I'd miss the area, but it's nothing a plane ticket and a week or two couldn't fix. Living here is just silly. Sure you can have a wider access to external experiences, but maybe you should spend time experiencing yourself.
You'd be amazed how many people in small towns spend their time attempting to bring some of the cultural experiences of larger metros to smaller areas. And to me, that seems a lot more noble than just soaking up prepackaged life in a metropolis.
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The Big ****ty
