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So I just started somewhere part time(I'm still looking for something else, but working on the car situation so I can start applying to places out of state) and so far in my working life, I've gotten assumptions from people because I don't run my mouth nor get into deep conversations at work with people. I stumbled upon this post by somebody and it hit the nail on the head exactly how I feel in work situations:
Don't get me wrong, I always speak to people I work with and if somebody is speaking to me, I'll be friendly. Sometimes when I'm speaking to my coworkers, they act like they don't hear me so I eventually stop saying something to them altogether. Some think a simple "Good morning" back to you is hard to say back when I'm speaking to them.
I'm just the type of person where I'm all about my business, I don't like telling people too much of my personal life(especially in work situations), I'm not loud nor do I talk a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm quiet nor do I have an attitude.
So I just started somewhere part time(I'm still looking for something else, but working on the car situation so I can start applying to places out of state) and so far in my working life, I've gotten assumptions from people because I don't run my mouth nor get into deep conversations at work with people. I stumbled upon this post by somebody and it hit the nail on the head exactly how I feel in work situations:
Don't get me wrong, I always speak to people I work with and if somebody is speaking to me, I'll be friendly. Sometimes when I'm speaking to my coworkers, they act like they don't hear me so I eventually stop saying something to them altogether. Some think a simple "Good morning" back to you is hard to say back when I'm speaking to them.
I'm just the type of person where I'm all about my business, I don't like telling people too much of my personal life(especially in work situations), I'm not loud nor do I talk a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm quiet nor do I have an attitude.
Does anybody else go through this?
Well, who knows if you still have me on ignore but yes, a lot of us go through this. It seems these days, working hard and being cordial is not what is wanted. What they want are Chatty Cathy dolls who hang around back stabbing and gossiping all day long.
Some will mistake what you are saying and think that you are not being sociable at all. Because they just can't see what you are saying.
You are being social, but you have to remember, people only care about themselves and what they want to hear. If it isn't about them, (and these types of people LOVE to talk about themselves...they will do it all day long if you let them), then it darn well better be about someone else and it better be trash.
Talk about yourself? Whatever for?! They don't want to hear about you! (General you, not personal you). Why aren't you allowing them to talk about...THEM!
Running joke line I used to have: "Ah well, enough about me, let's talk about me..." Some people were so dumb, they didn't get it.
Here's how you get along without having to say much of anything: Find out something about them, (it's not hard, they blab forever, you can find out a lot), ask them a question about it. Make sure it's not a "yes" or "no" type question, make sure it's something they will have to explain, or tell a story about, or that will set them off on a rant of epic proportions.
Now, just tune them out. Periodically you could look over and make eye contact...based on their expression, you will either say, "uh huh...and then what?" or, "go on" or, "OMG! Are you serious!? WHAT?!" (This last one is GREAT to keep them going at least another 10 minutes. In this 10 minutes, you tune them out again and continue on with your work.)
Guess what? They will think you are the most interesting person there. Why? Because they spent their entire shift talking about themselves as a result of YOU being there. It's some psychological thing...play it.
So I just started somewhere part time(I'm still looking for something else, but working on the car situation so I can start applying to places out of state) and so far in my working life, I've gotten assumptions from people because I don't run my mouth nor get into deep conversations at work with people. I stumbled upon this post by somebody and it hit the nail on the head exactly how I feel in work situations:
Don't get me wrong, I always speak to people I work with and if somebody is speaking to me, I'll be friendly. Sometimes when I'm speaking to my coworkers, they act like they don't hear me so I eventually stop saying something to them altogether. Some think a simple "Good morning" back to you is hard to say back when I'm speaking to them.
I'm just the type of person where I'm all about my business, I don't like telling people too much of my personal life(especially in work situations), I'm not loud nor do I talk a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm quiet nor do I have an attitude.
Does anybody else go through this?
I am not one to share a lot about my personal life either...so I keep it to neutral topics. My husband's ex is a nightmare (but nothing specific just funny anecdotes) or holiday plans, or when I was planning my wedding, some of the funnier things that happened (my husband's sister suggested we spend our wedding night in a tent in her front yard, my coworkers heard this story) and my saga with the stupid DMV was a good one too...as telling things like this are personal without getting into personal habits, etc. Basically, I can tell them about my day without telling them things that would be inappropriate with people I have never met.
I always make sure to say good morning to each person when I come in (I am the last in usually as I am the person in the office until we close for the day, some nights on my own) so I say hello to 4-5 people and am done.
Other than this, I do not really involve myself in conversations, but I let people tell me their stories...seems to work.
I love to talk, but I feel increasingly that people like to listen to your personal stuff and then use it against you. I have had this happen a few times. All it took was to have different beliefs than the status qo and I became a target. I have to work on keeping my trap shut!
So I just started somewhere part time(I'm still looking for something else, but working on the car situation so I can start applying to places out of state) and so far in my working life, I've gotten assumptions from people because I don't run my mouth nor get into deep conversations at work with people. I stumbled upon this post by somebody and it hit the nail on the head exactly how I feel in work situations:
Don't get me wrong, I always speak to people I work with and if somebody is speaking to me, I'll be friendly. Sometimes when I'm speaking to my coworkers, they act like they don't hear me so I eventually stop saying something to them altogether. Some think a simple "Good morning" back to you is hard to say back when I'm speaking to them.
I'm just the type of person where I'm all about my business, I don't like telling people too much of my personal life(especially in work situations), I'm not loud nor do I talk a lot, but that doesn't mean I'm quiet nor do I have an attitude.
Does anybody else go through this?
You don't have to reveal any personal information but not socializing will make you look very weird.
I go through that all the time. I don't go to work to socialize; I go there to do my job. Yes, I am cordial with everyone, but I wasn't hired to keep my co-workers entertained.
When people ask "Why are you so quiet?", say "Gee, that's funny, I was about to ask you why you talk so much!"
I go through that all the time. I don't go to work to socialize; I go there to do my job. Yes, I am cordial with everyone, but I wasn't hired to keep my co-workers entertained.
When people ask "Why are you so quiet?", say "Gee, that's funny, I was about to ask you why you talk so much!"
If you are being asked that question then it sounds like you have a problem
You don't have to reveal any personal information but not socializing will make you look very weird.
I agree with this.
It's hard for me to stay to myself in my new job since our office is pretty small and it's easy to hear everyone's conversations. On the one hand, I have quite a bit in which I can relate to my co-workers. They hang out every Friday after work and I went for the first time this past Friday and it was a good time. On the other hand, I know how co-workers can use information against you, so I am sure to keep conversations light and let them talk more than I do.
At the same time, there is one guy at my office who rarely says much. He says hello and is friendly. He and I speak and I like his soft-spoken nature. I only just learned that we both had the same kind of dog. He isn't any less respected or considered an outcast. People seem to respect him for who he is.
Guess it comes down a person's work environment and the co-workers there.
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