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I'd say without any specific examples or any idea of what's going on you can't do anything.
Sounds like another passive-aggressive boss who caters to the whiners rather than tell the employees to give the new guy a chance, specially if you don't see the condescending attitude.
Just go have a chat with the guy and say "hey you are doing great, just make sure you don't come off as condescending. And if this confuses you, that's fine, I'm confused too lol"
I'd say put yourself in the other person's position.....
What if someone came to YOU, trying to coach YOU about being condescending but couldn't give YOU any info about what was said or who complained.
I know I wouldn't take to kindly to that.
How about the possibility that the complainers need to GROW UP.
What the heck kind of complaint is 'he/she is condescending." That sounds like kindergarten.
Until you get more info...this whole thing could be BS.
Here is a reference link Condescending | What is the Definition of Condescending? | Dictionary.com. (sort of condescending for me to post this..lol...not intending it)
What a challenge. Are you the HR?? How did you get picked? I find folks who are condescending to be more attitudinal than anything else. Hard to teach someone about their attitude. I would want to talk to those that have complained and get some real examples of what he said that they consider condescending. Then you'll have an example for him. Or, you will identify the real issue...as others have said...It could be their own perception.
LOL...it is not condescending when I asked for help. And I appreciate it. I am so absorbed in trying to figure out how the heck to deal with this it never dawned on me to look it up in a dictionary...and I have a degree in English!!!
So you are going on hear say. I would think that you would need to speak to the complaining employees to hear directly from the horses mouth exactly what was said. How can you effectively deal with this with just vague statements? What reason is your boss giving you for not telling you who the complaining employees are?
He is saying that he does not want to make it a bigger issue than it is, that it is a minor thing now...and that bringing others into it (other than dragging me into it, apparently) would make it too big a deal.
And I am talking to him tomorrow so hopefully I will manage to have some sort of epiphany in the next 12 hours....
I'd say without any specific examples or any idea of what's going on you can't do anything.
Sounds like another passive-aggressive boss who caters to the whiners rather than tell the employees to give the new guy a chance, specially if you don't see the condescending attitude.
Just go have a chat with the guy and say "hey you are doing great, just make sure you don't come off as condescending. And if this confuses you, that's fine, I'm confused too lol"
I'd say put yourself in the other person's position.....
What if someone came to YOU, trying to coach YOU about being condescending but couldn't give YOU any info about what was said or who complained.
I know I wouldn't take to kindly to that.
How about the possibility that the complainers need to GROW UP.
What the heck kind of complaint is 'he/she is condescending." That sounds like kindergarten.
Until you get more info...this whole thing could be BS.
My boss is actually a nice guy. And I know where he is coming from...if he talks to him, it is a big deal. If I talk to him, it is HR talking to him, but casually.
I think I am just going to ask him how things are going and see what he says. Maybe, if I am lucky, he will have an issue or 2 with coworkers being really rude and I can go from there. I have no idea. LOL
Maybe a general discussion about how folks percieve things...and one person might be making a joke, when another person thinks it is rude. That it is difficult to work with people who all come from a different place...and may feel like he is being rude, when he is just trying to be helpful.
Sort of what I am thinking. I am going to ask him how he is doing, how he thinks he is fitting in, etc...and see if he mentions anything...sort of go from there. I did tell my boss I am going to take him out of the office for the chat. I am thinking the coffee shop near work, so I can get a chat that feels less formal.
Here's what I would do.
Rather than single out this new guy. I would have a couple of mandatory training sessions.
Ex: one of the typical work/sexual harassment issues, one on attitude....Or skip harassment and discuss "How to professionally complain at work" Because, seriously, the complainers should have come to you HR....
Have condescending be part of a whole list of things that people may do in a work atmosphere re: their attitudes.
Have all the employees attend, together...This sits up a discussion...And an awareness. Make up examples of the things on the list, pick condescending as a lead example....have the participants discuss this w/ their providing examples etc...
This doesn't single out the new guy, or the complainers. I think this is the fairest way, since your boss has cut your legs off w/ no examples and your not having even the opportunity to discuss w/ the complainers.
So, put them all in a group situation, learning the same things about the same issues. Voila...You've addressed the problem in a very professional manner.
End of the meeting have everyone sign off, verifying the training...So, if you get complaints...you have their signatures.
This is imo the best way...
Xcellent plan JanND. I was once on the receiving end of a talk like this, but my boss was pretty much sizing up my reaction. When I was not defensive, and truly shocked at how my co workers felt, she realized it was just a group of women being catty, and ganging up on the new kid.
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So you are going on hear say. I would think that you would need to speak to the complaining employees to hear directly from the horses mouth exactly what was said. How can you effectively deal with this with just vague statements? What reason is your boss giving you for not telling you who the complaining employees are?
