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Well the big boss, presumably has landed where she wants to so she doesn't need to worry about this. I agree with the big boss. Pharma is a more formal environment.
If you dress young and look young no one will believe you should be in charge. Step it up a bit. Pair your jeans with a blazer. Swap the jeans for a pencil skirt. Add some more polish. If you want to get promoted you might as well be perceived properly.
You know what, it doesn't really matter in the end whether you're a slob or whether your boss is a hater. In any job, your most important goal is to make the boss happy. That should be your first priority. If a clothing upgrade is what it takes, then do it.
Seems like a good opening to further dialogue with her. I would get a catalogue from a good, online clothing store. Go through it and circle 4 or 5 of your top choices for business attire. Take it to her (when she's not too busy). Let her know you thought about what she said and were trying to make the right choices, then ask her opinion on what you picked out. If she picks something totally off your comfort chart DON'T ARGUE (about anything). Smile, show genuine appreciation, then study "the look" . And figure out what modifications you can make to give that kind of appearance.
I love to shop at thrift stores where I can find nearly new items for usually under $10. If I only wear them twice, no biggee. Plus it's a great way to try a new look without breaking the bank.
Last I looked, jeggings are not trousers. If you think they are, that might be your issue. Your big boss has already made it to where she wants to be and can wear whatever she wants. You still have a few rungs to go up on the ladder. Just because other people wear jeggings (which I think of as well below jeans in terms of acceptability since they are also tight) doesn't mean you should. The office culture and what is acceptable also depends on your position.
Thank you everyone for your responses and insight.
Here's the the absolute truth: I have absolutely no desire to move up in this company. I do not like the work, the culture or quite honestly, the teams and people I work with. I have always worked in a more creative industries - broadcast, publishing, art dept, etc. After the past few months, I've decided that this job is not a good fit for me. While I appreciate her attempt to mentor me, I feel like it was presumptions to assume I want to move up the ladder here - again, I appreciate the thought, but she has never once actually bothered to check in w/ me to see how Im doing, how Im liking it, or if I even want to progress in the company.
My plan all along was to stick the job out for as long as I can. I was planning on leaving once my contract was up, but when the offered me more money to stay for a bit longer, I couldn't refuse. Super corporate dress has never been my style. When I was on the interview, I asked about the culture and style and they inisisted, oh no we're business casual.
The office rule is that jeans are permitted as long as they're not torn or frayed - which mine never are and I wear them maybe once or twice a week. I know that most ppl oppose jeggings, no matter how thick or expensive, but every girl or woman wears them on campus. If I do opt to wear them, they are always with a long shirt or sweater as to not "show" anything. But trust me, I get it.
I have been uncomfortable working there since day 1, but a job is a job until I can find something that better suits me.
Can I continue to wear my "lame" work appropriate clothes since I don't want to move up without her harrassing me about my clothes again? As mentioned before, I've always worked in creative companies and I am insecure about my work there as it is since I don't fully understand subject matter. Now I feel like this will constantly be in the back of my mind making me increasingly uncomfortable and horrible at my job.
If you are already at the level that you want to be with this company and you are not violating the dress code, I see nothing wrong with what you are wearing. However, if you feel insecure because there is something that you do not understand at work, I would work to become more familiar with the subject at hand. Is she the only one that ever mentioned your attire?
Yes. She is the only one that has ever brought up my attire. My direct mgnr has never mentioned anything to me. Actually, she does the opposite - she is usually quite complimentary on my clothes.
I think it wouldn't have been so hard to swallow if she wasn't wearing jeans herself and didn't have the same sweater on that she wears every other day. The office is freezing and you have to dress for it, so I get it. But buy a new sweater before you start playing project runway w/ me. It's even more frustrating because on some days, I already DO dress as some people has suggested on here. I can't wear heels often b/c I broke my ankle a while ago and Im usually in agony by the end of the day if I do.
Im also a bit offended because I felt it was presumptuous of her to say, "now you can buy some new clothes." She doesn't know my financial obligations. Sure, I get paid well. But she doesn't know that Im in extreme student debt, I send money to my mother, my husband and I are trying to have a baby, etc.
Im not very close w/ anyone in the office. I almost want to ask my direct mgnr if she has a problem w/ the way I dress, but Im worried she'll tell other ppl what happen or go back to my big boss and tell her.
I know I probably sound like a baby. But Im just upset because I already try to go out of my way to look nice. I had a panic attack getting dress this morning. I already feel so uncomfortable, I've been walking around w/ my coat draped over me.
Yes. She is the only one that has ever brought up my attire. My direct mgnr has never mentioned anything to me. Actually, she does the opposite - she is usually quite complimentary on my clothes.
I think it wouldn't have been so hard to swallow if she wasn't wearing jeans herself and didn't have the same sweater on that she wears every other day. The office is freezing and you have to dress for it, so I get it. But buy a new sweater before you start playing project runway w/ me. It's even more frustrating because on some days, I already DO dress as some people has suggested on here. I can't wear heels often b/c I broke my ankle a while ago and Im usually in agony by the end of the day if I do.
Im also a bit offended because I felt it was presumptuous of her to say, "now you can buy some new clothes." She doesn't know my financial obligations. Sure, I get paid well. But she doesn't know that Im in extreme student debt, I send money to my mother, my husband and I are trying to have a baby, etc.
Im not very close w/ anyone in the office. I almost want to ask my direct mgnr if she has a problem w/ the way I dress, but Im worried she'll tell other ppl what happen or go back to my big boss and tell her.
I know I probably sound like a baby. But Im just upset because I already try to go out of my way to look nice. I had a panic attack getting dress this morning. I already feel so uncomfortable, I've been walking around w/ my coat draped over me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sp99
Thank you everyone for your responses and insight.
Here's the the absolute truth: I have absolutely no desire to move up in this company. I do not like the work, the culture or quite honestly, the teams and people I work with.
I figured there was something else going on.
In order to survive, you have got to learn to separate your personal issues from your job so that comments like this don't have such a negative effect on you.
Try to look at the big picture: She meant well. You are focusing on all the wrong things and taking things WAY too personally. Of course she assumes you're trying to move up; why else would you be there every day? It's a compliment. Only YOU are taking it as an insult because it sounds like (it may not be but it sounds like) you think you're too good, too creative for this "stuffy" job.
Understand that your job is a great source of income and not an expression of who you are. Likewise, think of your clothing AT WORK as a uniform and not an extension of your personality. Get over yourself and put together some less casual more businesslike combinations that you can tolerate and just wear them. Then wear your jeggings on weekends.
And if you're THAT unhappy, then seriously start looking for another job.
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