When you can't afford to be depressed, yet you are... (debt, interview)
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movin'on and gypsy! You made decisions that were right for you and, presumably, were discussed with your SOs. This WILL pass for all of us. Maybe not as soon as we'll like, but it will happen. If you're doing your best to find a position and it's just not happening then, I'm sorry, your SOs are Cads. Despite being an attorney, my wife has found herself unemployed a few times in our 24-years together. I did what I could to help her find opportunities in her expertise. I never, NEVER!, said "just get something and stop moping."
I sent my wife flowers. I do the cooking anyway so, for something special, we'd go out to one of our favorite places and splurge. I'd surprise her with an inexpensive spa day. I know that these things can't always be done, but look for the opportunities.
You CANNOT look for a job 12-hrs a day. Jobs on the boards just don't change that much in these times. And, gypsy, if your husband doesn't understand that then tell him to go online and apply for some jobs he thinks are right up his alley. Let's see how many calls he gets.
No real point to this, I guess, but this is one of the saddest threads I've seen on this board because you've done everything right, but you're still feeling the pressure. Take some time and pamper yourself each day. You know you deserve it. Take Friday off as far as your search is concerned. No company is going through resumes with any real interest anyway.
Absolutely, don't second guess yourselves. Flowers to you both!
I think it's normal to feel depressed when you have no job or income. My work has really dropped off and I barely survive now. My living situation sucks. It is a real struggle for me to feel like I have a future. You start to loose hope. A lot of people feel this way right now. It is normal.
People who still have jobs get treated badly and overworked because employers take advantage. They beat you down. And then when quit your job, you sit at home and beat yourself down.
It is very hard right now. Just know that we are all in it together and hopefully none of use will starve.
Woofers
As usual, you are right. I guess it IS normal to feel this way all things considered. We do live in troubled times so best not to beat ourselves up too much. I doubt either one of us (I'd bet my life on it) were those among the powers that be that brought us to this brink.
And it IS very hard right now. And it does help to know we are in this together.
What's hard??? If you think America is hard right now, try living in Lusaka, Zambia or Lima, Peru or Dakar, Senegal or any of the 3rd world countries right now! You cannot even imagine! We have it so great in this country, we're just a little bit spoiled that's all. I don't mean to be rude or anything but despite of all the hardships, America is still the best country in the world!
What's hard??? If you think America is hard right now, try living in Lusaka, Zambia or Lima, Peru or Dakar, Senegal or any of the 3rd world countries right now! You cannot even imagine! We have it so great in this country, we're just a little bit spoiled that's all. I don't mean to be rude or anything but despite of all the hardships, America is still the best country in the world!
I don't think anyone is dissing America, rather what has happened in the last eight years to this country. It IS ok to lament the fact we are in a mess without comparing us to a third world country (although we are headed there).
I think the best thing is to set small goals. Tell yourself, I will make x phone calls today, or I will send out x resumes. Whatever it is, but start of small.
Looking for a job is like being self-employed. There's suddenly no structure to your day, no social life. You have to create everything. And things can start to feel bleak and hopeless in no time.
So tomorrow, before you do anything, get a notepad and write down your tasks for the day. It doesn't matter how stupid they are, write them down. Set small goals for yourself in terms of looking for a job. Put one foot in front of the other.....
Once you revamp your resume and start sending a few out, you see that it is really a very brainless process. And then you can set more ambitious goals. But start small. So when you look at your notepad in the morning, you think, "Oh, no big deal. I can do that!" When you are done, cross it off the list.
The other thing that is important, is don't isolate yourself. Try to visit a friend, even if it is for a cup of tea. Being around other people can really help bring you out of a depression. But spend time with kind understanding friends, not self-centered ones who just suck more energy out of you. You are already depleted, so you can't feed the vampires right now.
Also, it is very, very important to take care of your health. I recently started running again and it has really changed my outlook big time. Maybe running is not for you, but you can still go walking. Very important to get outside and smell the fresh air. When we are inside, we feel "stuck," when we step outside, we realize the world is a big place!
Also, go easy on the alcohol and cigs. I know they taste great, but they are not good for you.
I hope you feel better!
Can't rep ya but great advice. Act like you have a job, stay on a schecule.
OP---Sorry, you won't get any sympathy from me, or many other unemployed people. If your job was so tough, well, someone else is suffering right now in your former position. Only difference is, he/she has an income, you don't!
In this economy any job is better than no job, so now that you've ditched your job in favor of your "feelings" how does it feel to be unemployed?
OP---Sorry, you won't get any sympathy from me, or many other unemployed people. If your job was so tough, well, someone else is suffering right now in your former position. Only difference is, he/she has an income, you don't!
In this economy any job is better than no job, so now that you've ditched your job in favor of your "feelings" how does it feel to be unemployed?
Wow, way to be rude.
Tomorrow I'm going into a job that just dropped my insurance because they cut me down to 5 hours a week. I am extremely depressed that I have to go, and want nothing more to find something else, which I am trying to do. But every time I have to go in there I feel myself getting dragged down and the cycle starts again. Do I not have the right to feel terrible because I have to go to a place that I HATE?
So I'm sure you don't feel sorry for me because I do still have two jobs, but what you don't know is that I've been severely depressed for the last two months because of one of them, and because of the fact I am not making enough money to live right now with either one combined.
But I don't get your sympathy, so why am I even explaining it.
Movin' On - other people in this thread have great advice. I don't because I get in that funk way too easily myself.
OP---Sorry, you won't get any sympathy from me, or many other unemployed people. If your job was so tough, well, someone else is suffering right now in your former position. Only difference is, he/she has an income, you don't!
In this economy any job is better than no job, so now that you've ditched your job in favor of your "feelings" how does it feel to be unemployed?
Educate yourself on the impact of a poor work environment on health before you make a ridiculous statement like that. When one has to choose between their health or their paycheck, it's an easy decision. When I read/hear comments like yours, I always think of the old Tom Hanks bomb, Joe Versus the Volcano.
Volunteering has been mentioned many times on this thread. You never know where volunteering may lead you, who you'll meet, or if a volunteer position will turn into a paid job. Last year my husband was volunteering and after a few weeks they wanted to keep him full time, paid position. Recently, I volunteered on a local community farm and always came home with a big bag full of fresh vegetables that lasted me all week.
And if nothing comes of it, you've only helped - both yourself and the recipients.
OP---Sorry, you won't get any sympathy from me, or many other unemployed people. If your job was so tough, well, someone else is suffering right now in your former position. Only difference is, he/she has an income, you don't!
In this economy any job is better than no job, so now that you've ditched your job in favor of your "feelings" how does it feel to be unemployed?
You know, you're a mean little jane-come-lately! Movin' did not quit her job because of her "feelings". She quit to prevent her job from becoming the cause of the demise of her mental health, reason enough IMO. I think you missed the smiley with the tongue sticking out after your last sentence, cuz that's certainly how it came out!
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