Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
20-something gay man here to offer perspective. I am inclined to agree that there isn't the same need for "gay villages" or "gay ghettos" now as there was in decades past. To a typical gay man living here, West Hollywood is viewed more as a place to party than as a place to live. After I graduated college (where I knew many from the LGBT community), I only knew three people from there who moved to WeHo; a gay couple who were quite frankly "all about being gay," and another person who is very much into the "scene" there (his boyfriend moved in with him after he graduated as well).
Personally for me, WeHo is a fun, interesting place to visit but I could never live there. I find the pretentiousness and superficiality of the place too much to bear - many of the men there look too "pretty" and dress too young for their ages and I find that *just* a little scary. Combined with high real estate prices, it does not appeal to everyone.
Like it or not, the Internet and apps such as Grindr have replaced gay bars as the primary methods for gay men to meet each other. It is just as easy for me to meet other men here in the suburbs 30 miles away from West Hollywood, if not easier (again, the superficiality factor). There are plenty of gay men living openly in the suburbs, and with increasing societal acceptance and the online networks available there simply isn't as high of a need for a gay village.
Urban living does appeal to me, but I wouldn't consider "is it a gay village" when considering where to live, as I feel assured that what I do in my private life generally won't matter to most LA residents. And many other of my gay peers feel the same - even living open, happy lives in places such as Riverside!
I think gay villages will still have a place, but more as places to party than as places to live as society, both gay and straight, changes over the years.
I cannot tell you what gay life was like in the 60's or 70's. I was too young to know. I could tell you what I heard. I do not want to rain on anyones parade, but really, I know "Modern Family" is on TV and "Glee" and a new one on HBO called "Looking." Lets all get cozy, cause now we are totally accepted and anyone who doesn't see that must be ancient, stupid or both You don't even have to leave your state for a wake up call, as to how "gay" is a flash point for some people. I would suppose you also believe that racism is a thing of the past, too. We are all just here, so full of love. Oh, I think I see a unicorn hiding behind that rainbow. Seriously? Maybe it is time to down the pipe!
Yeah, I know the only people left on the planet who are racist are cops in a town outside of St Louis. Every where else its a world of colorful Care Bears! And homophobia, that is like small pox! We cured that a million light years ago. Right, check out Disneyland. Bedbugs and all of nasty things are all things of the past. And those creepy designers in Italy! Rude!!!
Reality check. The are people on the planet, alive and well, who would feel totally justified in throwing you off a building, or setting you on fire, are simply loping off your head with a sword, that was painfully in need of being sharpened, simply because you are gay. If you think that they only exist in The Middle East, you are living in your "Own Private Idaho." And we know how popular gays are in Idaho, or do you? Maybe because I, unlike my younger friends, realize how fragile our gay world really is in reality. This is an election year. But you are young! Whats the worst thing that could happen, right? We all know Hillary will be the next president, right? I bet there are some reading and this and aren't concerned in the least with anything political. Politics is such a tired sport enjoyed by old men and women.
Do yourself a favor, start paying attention to what these guys are saying. Some running this time want to make the US the Christian equivalent of some of the more radical Islamic Nations. Just a thought. Or just spend more time on that cover of "Royals'" to post on YouTube, that you have been making. Or you could go all Maverick, and vote for some religious zealot cause you like the way he looks, or maybe more likely, he is who your parents are voting for.
"Do yourself a favor, start paying attention to what these guys are saying. Some running this time want to make the US the Christian equivalent of some of the more radical Islamic Nations. Just a thought. Or just spend more time on that cover of "Royals'" to post on YouTube, that you have been making. Or you could go all Maverick, and vote for some religious zealot cause you like the way he looks, or maybe more likely, he is who your parents are voting for."
This poster says he couldn't talk about what it was like in the 60's or 70's, but he is at least aware of reality! I was around in the 60's and 70's and hell, I can tell you things haven't changed as much as many think. Go to small town USA and you could still be beaten, simply because you look gay. Go to any "Bible Belt" cities, and you will find you are a third rate citizen! Pay attention to what this writer has to say. I remember when way back in the sixties, a few places did away with Sodomy Laws ( you probably don't know what they are ) Everyone thought, "finally we are being accepted". We found out the hard way, as cities cracked down on their Gay citizens. Harassing Gay bars and especially the not lesser "gathering places". When AIDS hit the Gay Community in the early 80's, Gays were again stigmatized. People said it was "Gods Wrath", for a sinful lifestyle. In some places in the US it still is looked at, that way. I know, I live in rural Florida. Trust me, the hate is still there. Yes it's possible to meet people online, but here you have to make sure the person you are making a date with, isn't a Sheriffs Deputy, or a Gay basher! Gay people still disappear! They still get beaten! They still get murdered, just for who they are!
Sometimes I long for the days, where we met in dark smoky bars. The days when seeking out others, was an adventure. Then I think to myself, " you were young and cute then". I remember how lonely the older guys were. There was no other outlet for them to meet each other. They were the ones lurking in dark corners, behind bushes, or in public restrooms. That was the un-fun side of that era. Here in Florida, they are still around. They are the closeted ones, still too afraid to be themselves.
Trust me, things have changed a lot. Todays generation, has no idea of what it was like in my day. We had fun too, but we also had to constantly look over our shoulder. Sadly, when I watch the daily news. I see where things have not really changed all that much. That we once more can become a persecuted minority. If you don't keep up your guard, and realize politics can change things in an instant you are very naive. The 1920's and early 1930's were great for Gays in Germany, but within just a few years, they were being marched to the concentration camps. History is cyclical, it tends to repeat itself.
Trust me, things have changed a lot. Todays generation, has no idea of what it was like in my day. We had fun too, but we also had to constantly look over our shoulder. Sadly, when I watch the daily news. I see where things have not really changed all that much. That we once more can become a persecuted minority. If you don't keep up your guard, and realize politics can change things in an instant you are very naive. The 1920's and early 1930's were great for Gays in Germany, but within just a few years, they were being marched to the concentration camps. History is cyclical, it tends to repeat itself.
Interestingly, I agree with much of this, but I think it applies in a much broader context than just gays. It's one of the things I don't like about the gay political establishment....they view everything through this narrow gay prism and don't see the larger context of anything.
We have a global dictatorship being formed right under our noses for several decades (by both the political left and the right---the Nazis didn't go away, they just want back to the drawing board), yet people are caught up in single issue politics. It's a perfect way to keep people divided and not seeing the larger picture.
I sort of get a charge out of these many opening threads, on the state/city forums, that ask: Is this city Gay friendly, and/or does it have any Gay bars or Gay friendly neighborhoods? I'm retiring, I'm Gay, what's a good smaller Gay friendly city to retire to?
Just because a neighborhood has a larger Gay population, are they going to be friendly towards you? I lived in a neighborhood, with even fewer Gay people, and neither of the couples would give me the time of day!!!
If you're older, out-of-shape, and balding, how many of the younger ones are going to be friendly towards you? They may resent you flirting with them and give you a good kick!
My last Gay lover moved to Souix City, Iowa, from Minneapolis, and with the Internet now, he's had more dates/opportunities there than back in Minneapolis!
Being Gay, I haven't been to a Gay bar in over 12 years now, and have met some great people just thru Craigslist! All those worries are now over: Will I get a DUI on the way back home?
I really don't see any great need for rich or poor Gay ghetto's anymore. Maturity has finally arrived!
I now go the nearest local "straight" bar, 2 blocks away from me, and have no compunction anymore to blab to the whole bar I'm Gay!
I am reading a book on this called: There Goes the Gayborhood by Amin Ghazian.
In simplest form I'd say yes.
The lack of desire to live in a gayborhood is the least of differences between "old" gays and "young" gays.
I am in utter awe when I listen to "older" gays' stories of coming out at ages 25 and up.
It shocks me how many "older" gays have slept with a woman at one point in their life.
"Older" gays have told me that they were the only gays at their high school, I can count 20 that were in my high school class. 70 in the whole school.
The "gay lifestyle" is disappearing quickly, I feel that fabulous gay stereotype is somewhat novelty.
Sorry went on tangent.
-Gays are also such great gentrifiers that straight people also have heavily diluted gayborhoods that were previously blighted.
-HIV/AIDS seems to be something that galvanized the gay community but now isn't prevalent and isn't thought of (as much as it should be).
-Even the straight millennials are using dating apps to find matches, making it a social standard to meet people online.
There is just no need for gayborhoods, millennial gays want assimilation not segregation.
'79 or '80, I forget which, there was a mini Pride parade at my High School a couple weeks before Pride Weekend. I reckon many of my cohort who happen to be gay are probably not living in gayborhoods.
The 1960s and 1970s in North America saw marginal acceptance of homosexuality, then, when the 1980s brought the AIDS crisis, homophobes were emboldened and, socially, homosexuality was set back into the 1930s-40s.
The 1960s and 1970s in North America saw marginal acceptance of homosexuality, then, when the 1980s brought the AIDS crisis, homophobes were emboldened and, socially, homosexuality was set back into the 1930s-40s.
I don't think that's really true--or if it is, it didn't last long. It was more like it just brought all that homophobia to the surface and we dealt with (a lot of) it, paving the way for greater acceptance of things like gay marriage.
I came out in the late 1980s at a young age and I think that was a better time to be out of the closet than a decade earlier in many ways.
Interestingly, I agree with much of this, but I think it applies in a much broader context than just gays. It's one of the things I don't like about the gay political establishment....they view everything through this narrow gay prism and don't see the larger context of anything.
We have a global dictatorship being formed right under our noses for several decades (by both the political left and the right---the Nazis didn't go away, they just want back to the drawing board), yet people are caught up in single issue politics. It's a perfect way to keep people divided and not seeing the larger picture.
I would live in a gayborhood if I could find one not full of Meth. I lived in Palm Springs for awhile and meth heads stole some of my stuff.
Any suggestions?
I use grinder and scruff but have never met anyone in person from these.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
The Votes are in and Ghettos are out
I lived in a neighborhood, with even fewer Gay people, and neither of the couples would give me the time of day!!!
