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Old 09-05-2008, 04:05 PM
 
57 posts, read 163,494 times
Reputation: 30

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Whatever happened to standing up for yourself? There comes a point in time in every childs life when they're confronted like this. They can run or stand up to it.

The more he ignores this kid the more the kid will ride him. Confront it. If the kid doesn't back down punch him in the face and he will.

Life lessons. We can't protect our kids from everything and if we try, they grow up to be insecure pansies.
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Old 09-05-2008, 04:51 PM
 
Location: Yellow Brick Road
35,576 posts, read 43,794,221 times
Reputation: 20283
Well . . . thank you for sharing, JSM. I am sure you didn't really mean to call some our sons Insecure Pansies b/c they are trying to follow school rules, did you?
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Old 09-05-2008, 04:55 PM
 
Location: Sunny Florida
6,628 posts, read 6,778,547 times
Reputation: 7744
Dear impressionist,
How is your son doing now that the week is over? How are you doing? I'm so sorry you've had to endure this. I was hoping the school would step up and do more to help you. Please remember you can always kick this up to the next level and meet with the superintendent if you're not happy with how the principal handled the issue. My thoughts and prayers are with you, your son, and your family. I know how hard this can be for the innocent people involved.
Take care.
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Old 09-12-2008, 09:12 PM
 
21 posts, read 6,190 times
Reputation: 16
You definately need have an immediate conversation with the principal. When children are being taunted at school like that and they feel that their concerns are not being met, they end up being the children that shoot up the schools when they get older. Not to mention that chalking it up to boys will be boys could end up being damaging to your son. Not only does that type of ridicule and taunting cause issues will self esteem, but your child could end up feeling like you're not there when he needs you.
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Old 09-12-2008, 11:43 PM
 
Location: Union County, NC
2,112 posts, read 4,724,038 times
Reputation: 1083
I respect the OP's decision for her child and definitely sympathize with the situation.

I have a 10-year-old boy whom is a bully magnet. (And he's in middle school next year!) I've been at a loss myself many, many times when it comes to these situations. DH and I cannot agree on how to settle most of these situations. He basically encourages our more aggressive son to protect his younger brother at all costs. Of course, it begins with trying to instill self-assurance and confidence in my younger boy. He's a beautiful and intelligent little boy, with a soul a bit too gentle for the time and place.

Just wanted to note however, and this is something I am particularly sensitive to, I would have never had my boy removed from the classroom. That implies that he did something wrong. I would have lobbied to have the other child removed. This is not a condemnation for your decision, because it was tough. But for other parents who read this later, I just want them to consider the possibility that the bullied child may feel more reassured that he was in the right and people basically validated that by getting rid of the problem, not getting rid of him. This little one may have had friends in that class, a good repoire with the teacher, and now he is further victimized by the upset in his routine and break in continuity.

I really hope that your boy is now happier in his new surroundings. Oh we worry about them so much!

Love and blessings,

Sara
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Old 09-13-2008, 01:20 PM
 
4,227 posts, read 4,143,055 times
Reputation: 1529
Quote:
Originally Posted by jsmikesell View Post
Whatever happened to standing up for yourself? There comes a point in time in every childs life when they're confronted like this. They can run or stand up to it.

The more he ignores this kid the more the kid will ride him. Confront it. If the kid doesn't back down punch him in the face and he will.

Life lessons. We can't protect our kids from everything and if we try, they grow up to be insecure pansies.
Or, as a former veteran of combat, you could use your common sense and "Know your enemy" or better yet, "Choose you battles". From what we read, the kid was a nutcase and potentially dangerous. The correct action was to report him to authorities and make sure the police have a memo. In most cases a person must stand up for himself. Your "insecure pansie" is a bit outdated. The world has changed a lot since you were a kid, obviously.
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Old 09-14-2008, 07:27 PM
 
168 posts, read 319,160 times
Reputation: 29
Default what to do?

Quote:
Originally Posted by impressionist View Post
When I picked my son up from school today he was crying because of something that happened at school today. He is 9 and is not a crybaby at all. I want you to know first off, that in all of his schooling he has never had issues with anyone and has always been a pretty popular boy, so this is not normal for him at all, and I am really concerned.

Apparently, on the first day of school a boy said he couldn't play football with him and the other kids because he was white. This in itself really bothered me, but I let it go, told my son to let it go and stay away from him. Which I believe he tried to do.

I don't know if anything else happened or was said during the rest of the week, but today another huge thing happened and in my eyes it is really inexcusable and I believe this boy needs to be punished.

After talking to my son apparently this boy was messing with him and his friends, chasing them around and taunting them. Then the boy told my son he was going to "take him to the mountains and shoot him and cut his head off and blood will be everywhere." He said he was going to kill him and all of his friends. Then the boys started saying fight! fight! and my son says, "I don't want to get in trouble," and the boy called him a sissy and said his mom is ugly.

What would you do?
Well first of all, In the school where I worked the procedure was..

Parent calls the school/principals office. The principal should 1st speak to your son (privately)about what happened. Next the problem boy should be brought in separately and confronted with the events.
That child is a bully realize that and usually a bully folds "like a cheap camera" as they say...
Then the principal usually calls both or all the children involved to apologize to your son. The principal should either let the problem kid know if the situation continues he will have to face stiffer consequences.
KEEP ON THE SCHOOL IF IT ISNT RESOLVED YOU HAVE TO GO TO THE HIGHER UPS!!
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Old 09-18-2008, 06:40 PM
 
Location: far far away
1 posts, read 1,032 times
Reputation: 10
not trying to be mean , but now ur child has a taste of what other colored children go through and the way i got over bein called a beaner or a taco vender i just ignored people and if they didn't leave me alone thats when i started to fight , but to tell u the truth that happens every where and to everyone
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Old 09-28-2008, 08:24 AM
 
Location: Denver
89 posts, read 207,544 times
Reputation: 38
Explain to your child that reverse racism is something he will need to deal with for many years. If he knows that going into it he will not be upset when he runs into it and realize he is dealing with ignorant, uneducated people.
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Old 10-04-2008, 06:46 PM
 
Location: Indian Trail
14 posts, read 34,721 times
Reputation: 14
I would bring your concern to the school and let them handle it. If you are not happy with their action, then contact the school board. It sounds like the child is not in a good environment at home and may need help.
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