What does "family friendly" really mean... (Dallas, Fort Worth: transplants, apartments)

[nurse_101]

When my family relocated to DFW area 2 yrs ago I was very impressed by the "family friendly" description of the northern burbs, but after being here for a while I'm about ready to call BS!!! We live in Frisco (thank goodness we decided to rent first). The city is full of activities and things to do that are "family friendly", but I find many of the people to be cold, pretentious, and unfriendly. Granted, I am from southern Louisiana and grew up in an environment where neighbors treated each other like family...smiling and waving hello is considered common courtesy, so my expectations may be too high . I can honestly say that I don't know ANY of my neighbors, none of them speak (to me or each other), the children don't even play together. I have introduced myself to people, but the interactions are superficial and inauthentic. I definitely wouldn't go next door to borrow an egg, even if they owned an egg farm!! I don't see how people can live like this long-term, I certainly cannot do it. Also, I try my best not to judge others but I do feel that other moms judge on whether you're a SAHM or not. I say that because when I've had small talk w/ other parents at school activities/parties they ask if I work (I'm guessing b/c they've seen me in scrubs)...when I tell them I'm in grad school the response is usually along the lines of they couldn't do that b/c it would take away so much time from their kids or that their kids come first and since they're in so many sports, activities, they wouldn't consider working/school. I've been a SAHM before and financially could do it again, but I don't have the desire to at this time in my life. My kids are all school aged, I feel that this is an awesome time to pursue my dreams and still be a good mom and wife-thankfully God has equipped me to be able to do it all, successfully . I do think if I were able to exercise during the day or volunteer at the school all day I could probably crack the ice wall, but frankly I don't have a desire to do that. (and yes, I do volunteer my time and donate to the school...I just don't desire to be at the school from 8-3, M-F). It could very well just be the neighborhood that I'm in, so I don't want to dump on Frisco as a whole. I guess I just wasn't expecting this snobby, unapproachable attitude from middle class people...Anyway...I typed that huge rant/vent to ask what areas in the DFW area have a community/neighborly feel, welcome diversity, have people that actually talk to each other, where professional women are the norm (or at least common). Safety and schools (public) are the top concern, especially since I have three kids who are all extremely different academically so I really need a solid school system. We won't be moving until next year when I graduate, but our budget will be the 400-500K range, I could spend a little more but I really don't want to b/c we do like to travel a lot and I will have student loan debt to factor into our budget. Sorry for the long rant...hope I haven't offended anyone, just sharing my experience. Also, I know about the commute issues (I currently commute from Frisco to Fort Worth ), but w/ the group I'll be working for will allow me to select the primary hospital site, so I'm open to a variety of areas. Thanks in advance.

[nurse_101]

excuse the typos...don't feel like editing :-)

[SmartGXL]

Hi Nurse,

Frisco is a town that is populated mostly by transplants from other states. So you are not going to get that down-home, welcoming Texas attitude that you would get if you were living in some of the more rural areas of the state. Transplant towns tend to have that uppity, non-friendly attitude.

Having said that, I have heard that Ft Worth is supposed to still have that down-to-earth, welcoming vibe that TX is known for. Hope that helps!

[ChristieP]

Originally Posted by SmartGXL

Having said that, I have heard that Ft Worth is supposed to still have that down-to-earth, welcoming vibe that TX is known for. Hope that helps!

Most of Tarrant County (with the notable exception of Southlake) is like this.

[CREW747]

I agree with you 100 percent

We moved here from Greenwich,Ct and found the (mostly) pretend exterior of "wealth" in Frisco laughable. You are spot on. Frisco is mostly middle to upper middle class families who relocated from some place else. A certain kind of person is attracted to a 3500 square foot faux castle on a zero lot line. I have pored on here before about some of our comical interactions with people from Frisco. 2 sets of friends moved to Frisco years ago after relocating for jobs.They sold heir houses and ended up buying in Prosper and Mc Kinney. Going to Frisco sporting events with them for their kids at the middle and high school level was bizzare. There was never many people at the games. The 40 year old SAHMS dressed in clothes from bebe and Forever 21 with pink rhinestone cell phone cases were even more laughable. We chose to spend our $500,000 housing budget in Prosper and not Frisco mostly due to what you describe...

Prosper is a town that provides residents with a laid back, true upscale living environment.There are many households with two working parents. Prosper,Southlake and Flower Mound are polar opposite of Frisco in my opinion...Large lots,high median home values,very few apartments,rolling hills and trees..

[galore]

Family Friendly = code for middle-upper class straight majority caucasian christian demographics.

That's what you get in Collin County and that's why it is called family friendly.

[TurtleCreek80]

Most transplants shy away from the more established neighborhoods for fear of being excluded from the established, intact community.

What I have noticed in my years of living in the established neighborhoods in Dallas (Park Cities, Oak Lawn, and East Dallas) is that that those neighborhoods have more community and are more welcoming to newcomers because they want those people to come into their fold. They bring baskets of cookies when you move in, invite you over for Sunday night wine on the front porch, let all the neighborhood kids roam freely in all the neighbors yards, etc. People know their neighbors and have lifetime relationships with them. My mom still goes back to the street we grew up on to visit the elderly next door neighbors and for the monthly women's lunch.

Check out the Tanglewood neighborhood near TCU if you want an established, welcoming neighborhood in FW. If you're open to Dallas, we can make suggestions there too.

You won't however find brand new huge homes for $200k in the established neighborhoods f that's what you're looking for. These tend to be pricier neighborhoods with older, smaller homes.

[Fawnee]

Originally Posted by nurse_101

When my family relocated to DFW area 2 yrs ago I was very impressed by the "family friendly" description of the northern burbs, but after being here for a while I'm about ready to call BS!!!

LOL, Frisco sells that "family-friendly" slogan to trap transplants into buying homes built with cheap labor using cheap materials. It's like a huge red herring to take away from the fact that it's exactly, exactly the way you described it. At least you rented first. You'll find what you're looking for, just keep looking.

[nurse_101]

Thanks everyone, I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who has noticed this! I joined this forum prior to moving here and I'm so glad that I listened when others said to rent before buying b/c on paper Frisco was/is everything I wanted, but the reality of living here is very different than I imagined. Don't get me wrong, it's a great place for the right family just not a good fit for mine. Half the time I feel like I'm in some odd combination of the Stepford wives, Pleasantville, and the wanna be Real Housewives of Frisco lol! I do love DFW overall and I'm confident that I'll find the right place for my family when the time comes. Thanks again for the feedback.

[Pemberly283]

It's all that lead they are inhaling