Feeling guilty and ashamed of returning a rescue dog (boxers, clean, poop)
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I am feeling super guilty and ashamed of returning a rescue dog. He is 5 and a boxer mix. I am a first time owner. I believe he was found as a stray. I wanted a low key pups who knew a few things around the house (housebroken, crate trained, sit etc.) but the rescue said this dog may be the best for you. But during my time with him, I feel like I didn't give him enough time (had him for 5 days) to learn more about him, but over those days, we bonded quite well. He became semi protective over me, would jump up on me (never on anyone else) and always wagging his tail around me.
But sadly, circumstances has led me to decide to bring him back. (The rescue has an adoption clause where if the dog doesn't work out under any circumstances, they'll take them back within 30 days) Here are several circumstances of why I decided to bring him back.
1. Financially, I thought my parents would help me with the renting fee ($50) each month at our apartment. They live overseas, and the day before the adoption, they told me to reconsider the option. Then after the day I got my dog, they backed out financially. I wouldn't be able to afford everything (the extra 50 would be too much)
2. Within 5 days, he has had 4 accidents. 3 peeing accidents and 1 watery poop accident. I understand that rescues have trouble adjusting to new environments, and may forget their housebroken rules, but each time cleaning up, I just had regret of bringing the dog home.
3. The shelter told me he's crate trained, so I said great, thats perfect. I leave him in his crate at night and during the day. (Only did for night and 2 hours during the day) But both times, he was trying to break out the cage, and his pan was pushed out even though he has a dog bed with him. He constantly whine and barks in there, and it just breaks my heart.
4. During most days when I'm home, I always try to keep an eye on him. Even during the night, when I'm exhausted because I can't get enough sleep, because he literally acts like a puppy. He sleeps most of the time anyways, but when he isn't he has accidents. Doens't really enjoy playing.
5. The reality of having a dog is too time consuming. I was excited by the thought but not the reality. I didn't think I was going to give him a good enough home because I was resenting my decision and I know my dog was feeling that too.
I know it's never wise to rescue and return, because just increases the furry animal's separation anxiety but I had no other choice. All my friends told me to wait it out, and rescue even asked if I wanted to foster him. But in reality, I wasn't prepared for him mentally.
Any comments are welcomed about whether or not should have I kept my furry buddy?
Last edited by crunchybite2; 11-22-2016 at 12:49 PM..
Reason: added some things
You did the right thing. It's not always a good fit. I also think the rescue did you and the dog a disservice. Presumably you told them you wanted a low key dog, a boxer is anything but!
If you can't afford an extra $50 a month, what about his regular vet appointments, shots, etc. etc. which can easily run $200? Or if he gets sick and the vet wants to run a tests, again that can easily be $200 or $300 (or far, far more).
It might be better to wait until you have more money saved and live in a place where he does not have to spend as much time in a crate.
Any comments are welcomed about whether or not should have I kept my furry buddy?
Do other Rescue Organizations a favor and don't get another pet until you can pay for all of your own living expenses on your own with a lot of extra "padding", and have the time and patience to deal with "accidents" and other training.
If you can't afford an extra $50 a month, what about his regular vet appointments, shots, etc. etc. which can easily run $200? Or if he gets sick and the vet wants to run a tests, again that can easily be $200 or $300 (or far, far more).
Yep. Things like this certainly can get expensive.
We adopted our dog almost two years ago, we've spent thousands of dollars at the vet's office. From vaccines, heartworm pills, flea & tick preventatives, dental cleanings, growth removals, and an unanticipated injury and ongoing issues from that. Oy.
An extra $50 a month is too much? Then don't get a dog. A minor health problem can cost you $500 easily. I spend $50 on food for my dog alone.
The other stuff was minor behavioral issues that could easily be taken care of with time and some basic training practice.
There's no reason you shouldn't take the dog back or why you should feel ashamed about it. You are obviously not very well-informed (no offense, but your post pretty much lays that out), but the rescue group absolutely should have vetted you more fully and/or provided resources to educate you before sending a dog home with you. They're supposed to have higher standards than the local shelter. None of the rescues I have dealt with would have let you have a dog, frankly - you are just not ready.
Take the dog back and DO NOT feel guilty, but I would not go through that rescue group again, if I were you. They clearly don't know what they're doing.
The dog is lucky there is a return clause. Many people would just toss him out. Please, please take him back if you haven't already.
And as others have said, get yourself financially stable before getting another dog. Vets, like anything and everything to do with medicine, have gotten horrifically expensive. Even basic shots are over the top expensive these days.
If you wanted a dog, and never had one, you can offer to dog sit someone else's pet. You can also volunteer at your local shelter. A lot of people underestimate the amount of hard work, patience, research and costs it takes to own a dog. If you don't have the patience to potty train, get a cat. If you don't want to be informed about dog behavior and basic training, get a fish.
Some breeds mature slowly while others are more calm. Boxers are generally high energy dogs. They are very affectionate to their family and stays goofballs for a long period in their lives. Do your research next time and figure out which breed would work with your lifestyle, whatever dog or cat you want. If you want calmer dogs, stay away from labs, boxers, goldens, collies, huskies, etc. Some pits are hyper but many are couch potatoes, like greyhounds.
If you still want a companion, but will do the work, I recommend a cat. A Himalayan or Persian if you can find one to adopt is a great experience for a first time pet owner. They are calm, playful and loyal. Stay away from the Siamese line as they will demand more than you can handle.
And get another job if you are struggling over $50. If you are old enough to live on your own, you are old enough to work a little harder.
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