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No, because the assistant principal hated me, so he wanted me to be disqualified from honor roll. If he felt that it was unfair (which it was), he wouldn't have given me detention at all.
What I think happened was: the alleged incident happened on a Tuesday, let's say May 1 (I do not remember what the actual date was). The intention was for me to serve the detention from Wednesday, May 2 through Tuesday, May 8 (again, not the actual dates, since I don't remember them). For some reason, the assistant principal wrote it as May 3 - May 8. His secretary told me that I will be serving my detention from Thursday, May 3 through Wednesday, May 9. Presumably, that was because she saw May 3 written as my first day, and just assumed that it would be 5 days. I didn't notice the error until the next day, so I asked the assistant principal whether or not I would have to serve detention on May 9; he said that I would not have to, since it was his error in writing down the dates (the possibility that he had intended me to serve detention that day, May 2, hadn't occurred to me).
At the end of every school day, they announced over the PA system the list of students who had detention that day. I was not listening to it closely that day, but several students mentioned that my name was announced on May 2 as having to report to detention. But I guess I did not get in trouble for not showing up to detention that day, since the assistant principal and I had agreed that I would only have to serve detention May 3 - 8. When I was serving detention on May 8, the teacher on detention duty told me that he was surprised that I was not on his roster for detention for the next day, given that he had never heard of anybody getting 4 days of detention. I explained that it was due to an error, and that the assistant principal agreed I would only have to serve 4 days, and I also explained that I should not have had to serve any days, since this was due to something I was falsely accused of, but lost the "popular vote" by having fewer "witnesses" than the other guy.
Damn, who'd think getting a few detentions would be so complicated!
That story brought back memories of talking with my high school dean about the days I would serve the detentions he gave me. And I was able to shave a day off here and there whe he gave me multiple days, as you did.
What grade were you in at the time? Did you have to walk home after detention or was there a late bus? There was no late bus at my school so detention left us stranded, since the bus was long gone before it ended. Luckily I lived fairly close to the school.
I'm still scratching my head at the "popular vote" thing. Never saw that when I was in school.
In any case, my school's honor roll requirements were a certain grade average, with no single grade below a certain point. Nobody was excluded from the honor roll on the basis of detentions, and I was on the honor roll most semesters, even when I managed to run up a healthy detention count.
Last edited by dazzleman; 02-11-2016 at 07:59 PM..
Damn, who'd think getting a few detentions would be so complicated!
That story brought back memories of talking with my high school dean about the days I would serve the detentions he gave me. And I was able to shave a day off here and there whe he gave me multiple days, as you did.
What grade were you in at the time? Did you have to walk home after detention or was there a late bus? There was no late bus at my school so detention left us stranded, since the bus was long gone before it ended. Luckily I lived fairly close to the school.
I'm still scratching my head at the "popular vote" thing. Never saw that when I was in school.
In any case, my school's honor roll requirements were a certain grade average, with no single grade below a certain point. Nobody was excluded from the honor roll on the basis of detentions, and I was on the honor roll most semesters, even when I managed to run up a healthy detention count.
I was in 6th grade at the time. There was a late bus, but it was quite a while after detention ended. School was much too far away to walk. My parents picked me up after detention so that I didn't have to wait for the late bus. If your parents didn't pick you up after detention, and you waited for the late bus, it was essentially an extended, unsupervised detention. Probably not the best idea, but nothing about this school made any sense.
Interestingly, this middle school shared a campus with a high school. There was an earlier late bus that left from the high school, but middle school students were not supposed to use it. Detention at the middle school was specifically timed so that you would just miss that bus. However, if the detention teacher dismissed everybody a few minutes early, or if the late bus left a few minutes early, it would occasionally be possible to catch that bus. However, if even one person who had detention was caught using that bus, everybody who served detention that day would have to serve another day, whether they used the bus or not. I never understood why they punished everybody in that case, and not just the students who used the bus that they weren't supposed to be on. Nor did I ever understand why they could punish students for using a bus that was paid for by their parents' tax money.
In any case, the day after the "incident" (the day that I was announced on the PA system as having detention, but the assistant principal confirmed that I did not have to serve due to his error) a student was caught taking the high school late bus, so everybody had to serve an additional day. So, if the assistant principal didn't make that error, I would have ended up serving 6 days of detention, instead of 4!
What I wonder is, if having to serve an additional day of detention due to another student using the high school late bus caused you to go over 5 days, whether or not that would disqualify you from honor roll.
The other thing that bugged me about honor roll: in every class, you would get a behavior grade: 1 (the best grade), 2, or 3 (the worst grade). If you got a 3 for behavior in even a single class, you would be disqualified from honor roll, no matter what your grades were, and even if you got a 1 in all other classes. Again, that was another way for my school to ignore the habitual offenders (who wouldn't be on the honor roll anyway, and likely wouldn't care), while nailing the high achieving student who either had a personality conflict with a teacher, or who had a one-time lapse in judgment, or who stood up to a bully.
I had one teacher who kept giving me 3's and disqualifying me from honor roll, even though most of my teachers gave me 1's. That was a rare case of where my parents actually tried to intervene on my behalf (like I said, they usually took the school's side) and complained to the assistant principal. Unfortunately, while he said that he agreed that I did not deserve the 3 (even though he hated me), there was nothing that he could do about it. I feel as if the behavior grade was basically a way for teacher to disqualify from the honor roll a student that he/she does not like for whatever reason, regardless of grades, and with no checks and balances.
Most commonly, people would get 2's for their behavior grade. One teacher said that you "have to be a mummy" to get a 1. I felt that was an extremely stupid comment. In another class, when I got a 2, and I asked the teacher how I can behave differently in the future to get a 1, she said "make believe you are deaf and dumb". Whatever.
I was in 6th grade at the time. There was a late bus, but it was quite a while after detention ended. School was much too far away to walk. My parents picked me up after detention so that I didn't have to wait for the late bus. If your parents didn't pick you up after detention, and you waited for the late bus, it was essentially an extended, unsupervised detention. Probably not the best idea, but nothing about this school made any sense.
Interestingly, this middle school shared a campus with a high school. There was an earlier late bus that left from the high school, but middle school students were not supposed to use it. Detention at the middle school was specifically timed so that you would just miss that bus. However, if the detention teacher dismissed everybody a few minutes early, or if the late bus left a few minutes early, it would occasionally be possible to catch that bus. However, if even one person who had detention was caught using that bus, everybody who served detention that day would have to serve another day, whether they used the bus or not. I never understood why they punished everybody in that case, and not just the students who used the bus that they weren't supposed to be on. Nor did I ever understand why they could punish students for using a bus that was paid for by their parents' tax money.
In any case, the day after the "incident" (the day that I was announced on the PA system as having detention, but the assistant principal confirmed that I did not have to serve due to his error) a student was caught taking the high school late bus, so everybody had to serve an additional day. So, if the assistant principal didn't make that error, I would have ended up serving 6 days of detention, instead of 4!
What I wonder is, if having to serve an additional day of detention due to another student using the high school late bus caused you to go over 5 days, whether or not that would disqualify you from honor roll.
The other thing that bugged me about honor roll: in every class, you would get a behavior grade: 1 (the best grade), 2, or 3 (the worst grade). If you got a 3 for behavior in even a single class, you would be disqualified from honor roll, no matter what your grades were, and even if you got a 1 in all other classes. Again, that was another way for my school to ignore the habitual offenders (who wouldn't be on the honor roll anyway, and likely wouldn't care), while nailing the high achieving student who either had a personality conflict with a teacher, or who had a one-time lapse in judgment, or who stood up to a bully.
I had one teacher who kept giving me 3's and disqualifying me from honor roll, even though most of my teachers gave me 1's. That was a rare case of where my parents actually tried to intervene on my behalf (like I said, they usually took the school's side) and complained to the assistant principal. Unfortunately, while he said that he agreed that I did not deserve the 3 (even though he hated me), there was nothing that he could do about it. I feel as if the behavior grade was basically a way for teacher to disqualify from the honor roll a student that he/she does not like for whatever reason, regardless of grades, and with no checks and balances.
Most commonly, people would get 2's for their behavior grade. One teacher said that you "have to be a mummy" to get a 1. I felt that was an extremely stupid comment. In another class, when I got a 2, and I asked the teacher how I can behave differently in the future to get a 1, she said "make believe you are deaf and dumb". Whatever.
Wow, lots of things to trip a guy up. It's surprising anybody got onto the honor roll at that school. My school did not have conduct grades after the point when we no longer stayed with the same teacher all day.
I only had problems with two teachers in high school. Ironically, the problem with both was going on at the same time. They gave me a handful of detentions each, but that never affected my grades. I did well in both classes.
Did you go to that adjacent high school? And did you like it any better than the middle school? I would say that the middle school years are the worst.
Last edited by dazzleman; 02-13-2016 at 10:25 AM..
Wow, lots of things to trip a guy up. It's surprising anybody got onto the honor roll at that school. My school did not have conduct grades after the point when we no longer stayed with the same teacher all day.
I only had problems with two teachers in high school. Ironically, the problem with both was going on at the same time. They gave me a handful of detentions each, but that never affected my grades. I did well in both classes.
Did you go to that adjacent high school? And did you like it any better than the middle school? I would say that the middle school years are the worst.
Yes, I did go to the adjacent high school, and I liked it far better than middle school. I was rarely bullied in high school, and I only got detention once in high school (early in my freshman year). I also had problems with 2 teachers in high school: one was a teacher with mental problems (but she had tenure, so there was nothing they could do about her), and the other was more of a clique issue. Luckily, we didn't get behavior grades in high school, so there was no way for an individual teachers to automatically disqualify a student from honor roll. But a suspension or too many days of detention still disqualified you, just like middle school.
I agree that middle school is by far the worst. I wonder why that is.
I really wish schools would change the angle of anti-bully programs.
They always focus on telling bullies to stop being bullies. Yeah, right... like that will ever happen. Bullies grow up to be adult bullies. Most likely their parents are bullies as well. How many bullies have you worked with as an adult?
Instead, I think it would be much more beneficial to teach students how to deal with bullies or how to cope with being bullied.
Yes, I did go to the adjacent high school, and I liked it far better than middle school. I was rarely bullied in high school, and I only got detention once in high school (early in my freshman year). I also had problems with 2 teachers in high school: one was a teacher with mental problems (but she had tenure, so there was nothing they could do about her), and the other was more of a clique issue. Luckily, we didn't get behavior grades in high school, so there was no way for an individual teachers to automatically disqualify a student from honor roll. But a suspension or too many days of detention still disqualified you, just like middle school.
I agree that middle school is by far the worst. I wonder why that is.
I think middle school is the worst because the kids are at such an awkward age. Most teachers agree that middle school is the worst year to teach, also, and most parents would probably say that that's the age when their kids are the most difficult to parent.
By high school, most kids have become more comfortable with their post-pubescent selves. Bullying in high school tends to be at a lower level, and more passive, than bullying in middle school, at least in my observation. Kids form into their own groups and seem to have more a "live and let live" mentality, even towards those they don't want to be friends with.
I really wish schools would change the angle of anti-bully programs.
They always focus on telling bullies to stop being bullies. Yeah, right... like that will ever happen. Bullies grow up to be adult bullies. Most likely their parents are bullies as well. How many bullies have you worked with as an adult?
Instead, I think it would be much more beneficial to teach students how to deal with bullies or how to cope with being bullied.
Children are being taught that someone else will fix their problems.
And then they grow up to be adults expecting that someone else will fix their problems.
I learned about bullies from my step father when I was about seven and he started "hitting me for my own good" because he was drunk and frustrated. (note: I write this from a 60+ year perspective) I put up with seven years of that until I went from a skinny kid to a 140 -pounds of well muscled 14 year old with the speed of a weasel on crack and a massive grudge. I told him I would beat him to death if he hit me or my mother again and he believed me. Unfortunately he did not stop hitting my mother but she was so frightened a codependent to his alcoholism she did not say anything but dragged me off to a city slum. The grudge got bigger.
I looked him up a few years later after I got back from duty on the Mekong River and figured I would play a bit of catch up. When I saw how weak, pathetic and pickled he was I just wished him a long and miserable life and walked away. Grudge ended.
I still believe that bullies really enjoy bullying and are being defended by a system unwilling to provide any discipline lest they damage the bully's personality. They should realize the kid's personality is already damaged and he or she has to be removed from the rest the school or to literally have their ass kicked by someone that knows how to hurt without damaging. Counseling is not likely to work with a dedicated bully that is enjoying himself.
I disagree with any efforts to restrict gun ownership to a few selected "good guys" and every criminal that can buy a gun on the black market. The "good guys" need to be taught how and when to carry and use a firearm. We cannot expect or trust the police to be there to protect us from an assailant. We have to defend ourselves, no matter how much this disturbs the peaceful, and the government has no right to limit how we do it. I believe we have a right to carry a gun, openly or concealed, wherever we have a right to be. Criminals do not discriminate by location except to consider "gun free" zones to be a cafeteria.
Better to never be concerned about the 12 while making certain you do not have to be carried by the 6.
I really wish schools would change the angle of anti-bully programs.
They always focus on telling bullies to stop being bullies. Yeah, right... like that will ever happen. Bullies grow up to be adult bullies. Most likely their parents are bullies as well. How many bullies have you worked with as an adult?
Instead, I think it would be much more beneficial to teach students how to deal with bullies or how to cope with being bullied.
the first important thing was probably the notion that bystanders ARE part of the bullying process. My first publication on this topic came out in 1996, and at that time it was still common to focus (both in research and in interventions) on the individual bullies and victims. Today, the view of the group as participant is widely spread and also mentioned (e.g., empowering the bystanders) in many bullying prevention/intervention programs.
I really wish schools would change the angle of anti-bully programs.
They always focus on telling bullies to stop being bullies. Yeah, right... like that will ever happen. Bullies grow up to be adult bullies. Most likely their parents are bullies as well. How many bullies have you worked with as an adult?
Instead, I think it would be much more beneficial to teach students how to deal with bullies or how to cope with being bullied.
I think both approaches are needed. Certainly, they need to teach students how to deal with bullies. But by not stopping bullies, they are allowing workplaces and our government to both be ruled by bullies. I think part of the problem is that schools want to teach kids to be blindly obedient to authority.
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