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I think it depends. I think women who are overweight become more invisible than the equivalent men do. I also think men have more of an opportunity to be judge on something other than their size than women do. Or have an opportunity to have a multi-faceted persona.
I'm speaking in terms of dating, not entertainment.
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Let's compare the comments about someone like Melissa McCarthy vs Jack Black.
Every article about McCarthy seems to want to make her weight/appearance relevant to the movie. And for Jack Black, they focus on whether or not he is funny.
I actually saw a review of McCarthy's last movie that talked about her weight and how she brandishhed it during the comedic scenes, but also said she had a beautiful face. Never seen that type of assessment thrown at a male actor. Of course, most critics are males, but never seen any female critic ever call an overweight actor appealing physically or facially.
In respect to OP, and the pictures the way celebs are expected to dress puts different sorts of pressure on them. A taller guy can disguise 25 pounds under a tuxedo pretty easily. A woman has a more difficult time with the sort of attire that she'd be expected to wear at an awards show....often strapless or form fitting, those sorts of dresses aren't very forgiving.
But in general I'm not sure that is more acceptable for either to be overweight. I'd hate to be a very overweight guy in swim trunks. I think each gender has their own challenges in this respect.
My dad was quite tall, and had periods where he was overweight, sometimes just a little, sometimes more. He already had a large frame, and a few extra pounds, he was just perceived as a "big guy", which he was. Put those same amount of extra pounds on my mom...a completely different effect.
I have had this experience myself. My soon-to-be-ex was morbidly obese yet still insulting my appearance on a regular basis, as well as the appearance of random women out and about, while he was binging and getting ready to have gastric bypass surgery. He would always say, "I'm big but I'm not that fat." It was maddening.
it is funny how a lot of fat people see themselves as "not that fat." its a defense mechanism that allows them to live with themselves as they are.
i think its unacceptable for both genders to be fat but women probably get more abuse for it overall. but if you are a fat guy and you get into an argument with someone, the first thing that will come out of that person's mouth is "you fat x x x x"
Personally, I like thin women -- sizes 2 to 4. I can find a size 6 attractive, but that's starting to get a bit chunky for my tastes. Women, people don't lynch me. I know these are very strict standards, but I'm being honest here. Thin and svelte with no lumps is what I like. I'll say this for myself, I keep myself in very good shape. I keep my body fat percentage around 10 percent and work out 6 to 7 times a week. I'd imagine that a healthy size 8 and up would have no interest in dating me because she'd think I would be too judgemental about her diet and exercise regimen. She'd be right. I don't want to be a fitness nag, so I have no interest in women who don't have high fitness standards.
A woman can be thin without being a size 2 to 4. That is an odd statement to make without referencing frame size or height. I could never get into a size 6 no matter what I weighed because it wouldn't fit my shoulders or bust, especially if it was something very fitted like a tailored dress, pea coat or blazer.
It is sort of like what you said in your earlier post about your waist size....you wouldn't expect a man much taller than you to conform to the same waist size. Even waist size in a man is dependent on hip/frame size.
A funny thing I notice about my kids's clothes. If you brought a tshirt in size 2-4..a small or extra small for a woman....it is really not cut that much differently in terms of the amount of fabric than a tshirt I'd buy for my ten year old son. If I'm ten inches taller than my son...why would I be expected to fit into the same size tshirt he does?
I think it depends. I think women who are overweight become more invisible than the equivalent men do. I also think men have more of an opportunity to be judge on something other than their size than women do. Or have an opportunity to have a multi-faceted persona.
Let's compare the comments about someone like Melissa McCarthy vs Jack Black.
Every article about McCarthy seems to want to make her weight/appearance relevant to the movie. And for Jack Black, they focus on whether or not he is funny.
Well actually, since you mention Jack Black, I heard recently that he's felt pressure to lose weight, as he's been told by casting people that he's too fat for several roles.
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I cannot tell you how many overweight women I have encountered who snub overweight men and then get dismayed when "thin" or "fit" men don't want them.
Interesting that you say that, as I've noticed it a bit myself, especially ones from more affluent backgrounds.
From the vantage point of the human body, it is not acceptable (or safe!) for neither men or women to be overweight. We need to put the sexist/gender issue aside and look at this one simple question:
Is being overweight good (acceptable) for MY body?
Well actually, since you mention Jack Black, I heard recently that he's felt pressure to lose weight, as he's been told by casting people that he's too fat for several roles.
That is definitely new! Think about all of those starts in the 80s/90s/2000s that were cleaning up in the movies. Hollywood is definitely a special place. But it is very representative of how the general public feels about things. LArgely, being an overweight (or older woman) makes you become invisible. With a couple of exceptions here or there.
There are definitely more opportunities for overweight guys to get different types of roles, but for women there is a limit on who/types you get to play.
it is funny how a lot of fat people see themselves as "not that fat." its a defense mechanism that allows them to live with themselves as they are.
i think its unacceptable for both genders to be fat but women probably get more abuse for it overall. but if you are a fat guy and you get into an argument with someone, the first thing that will come out of that person's mouth is "you fat x x x x"
Man, everything you say is so true. Rep points are in order.
The wife and I are "upgrading" our life insurance, so just this morning a person came out to do physical and when the wife stepped on the scale and it read 119 pounds at 5' 2" tall she gave me high five and said "Thats right!!"
Ladies, you need to look at the issue at hand and ask yourselves who is doing the "accepting" here...it's you. You accept fat men by saying things like "I love a big man with extra meat on his bones" or something along those lines. Most women still find the "bigger" guy more masculine, and therefore go for the bigger guy.
As a lean, fit guy on the skinnier side, I wish women WOULD be less accepting of overweight men, but it is what it is. Like others have said, I think it's pretty unacceptable for both genders, pretty much equally.
Ladies, you need to look at the issue at hand and ask yourselves who is doing the "accepting" here...it's you. You accept fat men by saying things like "I love a big man with extra meat on his bones" or something along those lines. Most women still find the "bigger" guy more masculine, and therefore go for the bigger guy.
Sometimes that is true, but it depends on the fitness level of the big guy. When I was a fat gym rat I did much better with women than when I was less bulky but still tubby.
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As a lean, fit guy on the skinnier side, I wish women WOULD be less accepting of overweight men, but it is what it is. Like others have said, I think it's pretty unacceptable for both genders, pretty much equally.
I'm on the other side of that spectrum from you, and I wish women would be MORE accepting of overweight men.
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