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Old 08-13-2016, 01:34 PM
 
93,238 posts, read 123,842,121 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bert_from_back_East View Post
I'm very sorry to hear of your negative experiences, but I hate to tell you that it's really par for the course.

It's often hard for young people who have lived on the West Coast for their entire lives to fathom that interracial dating really is neither common nor accepted in much of the rest of the country, even in 2016. This is especially true in more insular regions of the country, such as Appalachia, the Great Plains, interior Northeast/New England, etc.

Also, people tend to be a lot more traditional in the Eastern half of the country relative to the West Coast, especially Seattle and Portland, so people tend to pick a mate that has something in common with them, such as ethnic heritage and/or religious tradition.

I can't tell you how many people I know in the Northeast that would ONLY settle down with someone with a shared heritage, (e.g., Italian, Jewish, Greek, Portuguese, Lebanese, etc.). Los Angeles is surprisingly similar in this regard, too, probably due to all the first- and second-generation Middle Eastern immigrants.

In the South, OTOH, it's more centered on race and religious tradition.

I'm gay and live in Los Angeles, and although I've dated every color of the rainbow, I've decided to settle down with a white guy at the end of the day.

I'm not racist; I just don't want to deal with the stress that goes along with bridging the cultural divide that often exists between different cultures, in particular Asian and Latino cultures.

Being gay in America (not so much on the West Coast, but in general) is challenging enough. Having to learn a foreign language just to communicate with your in-laws is over-the-top, IMO.

For you and your girlfriend, I would suggest moving back to the West Coast. Yes, people in urban areas of the East, Midwest and Intermountain West are probably a little more accustomed to seeing interracial couples, but once you guys decide to start a family and move to the suburbs, you're going to be right back at square one.

Los Angeles and the Bay Area would be your best bets.
Stop fibbing. There are plenty of interracial relationships in many of those other regions.(Shrug)
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Old 08-13-2016, 02:50 PM
 
Location: California
1,726 posts, read 1,719,842 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ckhthankgod View Post
Stop fibbing. There are plenty of interracial relationships in many of those other regions.(Shrug)
Yes, there are, but to insinuate that the vast majority of relationships in the Eastern half of the country are interracial would be disingenuous at best.

Even in California, many whites, for example, still stick to their own. This is very apparent in Orange County, San Diego, Ventura, Santa Barbara and the Central Coast, Sacramento and much of the Central Valley, the East Bay and, of course, the North State.

Better the devil you know than the devil you don't, if you ask me. YMMV.
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Old 08-13-2016, 08:38 PM
 
93,238 posts, read 123,842,121 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bert_from_back_East View Post
Yes, there are, but to insinuate that the vast majority of relationships in the Eastern half of the country are interracial would be disingenuous at best.

Even in California, many whites, for example, still stick to their own. This is very apparent in Orange County, San Diego, Ventura, Santa Barbara and the Central Coast, Sacramento and much of the Central Valley, the East Bay and, of course, the North State.

Better the devil you know than the devil you don't, if you ask me. YMMV.
No, I didn't say that the vast majority of relationships are interracial in the Eastern portion of the country. I said that it isn't unusual to see such relationships in many of the other regions that you mentioned.
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Old 08-13-2016, 08:58 PM
 
1,462 posts, read 1,427,829 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Formely_A_Commodore View Post
To the posters above throwing out Richmond and Austin as choices, what makes you guys so sure? I mean I said Nashville and Charleston because I have specifically known Indian/South Asian guys in those cities that dated hot blondes and had absolutely no problems at all. Find it hard to believe that it would be no issue in Richmond.

Maybe people there would be okay with an elderly or middle aged couple that fit that mold but a young hot blonde dating some Indian dude and both the couple being in their 20s? I would think that would get a lot of negative attention in many parts of the country. Not nearly as bad as Atlanta (because Georgia is by far the most racist and intolerant state in the nation towards foreigners) but it would be somewhat bad.

The only areas I see as being good for OP are.

1. Southern cities like Nashville and Charleston where people just don't care about this sort of stuff for some reason, that and because there are plenty of good looking white women in these cities so guys aren't losing their tempers over it unlike in Georgia.

2. Florida, especially areas such as Tampa, it seems to be somewhat normal to see darker latinos dating cute white girls in the state so I don't think people would care as much.

3. Chicago, went there, it seems to be the interracial dating capital of the USA, people literally don't care.

4. Back to the northwest.

All of the areas I named above I named because I've seen brown guys dating hot blondes and being left alone, unlike in Atlanta where you are practically putting your life at risk for it.
Lets just deal with facts because your ignorance is showing.
FACTL
Georgia is 5th in the nation in interracial dating.
Top 20 States For Interracial Dating (INFOGRAPHIC)
FACT:
The only state ranked in the Top 20 in the West is California and its number 1.
FACT:
Blacks date/marry 2.5 times more than whites.States with high minority populations have more interracial marriage.I.E. Georgia at #5

FACT:
Chicago is THE MOST SEGREGATED CITY in America so is it really the best place for those couples?
Also Georgia is barely red state and has elected statewide key positions with blacks in charge.While it is largely a conservative state,your remarks are not at all accurate
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Old 08-14-2016, 07:21 AM
 
Location: Wonderland
67,650 posts, read 60,875,858 times
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Top Twenty States for Interracial Dating (and I would assume much of that dating leads to marriage) according to HuffPost:

Top 20 States For Interracial Dating (INFOGRAPHIC)

But this is an even more comprehensive and current breakdown of stats by race and combos of races, and this is their list of the states with the highest rates of interracial marriage:
Hawaii

Nevada

New Mexico

Oklahoma

Washington

Oregon

California

Alaska (really?!)

Arizona

Texas

Florida
And the States with the Highest Interracial Marriages Are... - Beyond Black & White

This article is really worth reading.
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Old 08-14-2016, 12:10 PM
 
93,238 posts, read 123,842,121 times
Reputation: 18258
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
Top Twenty States for Interracial Dating (and I would assume much of that dating leads to marriage) according to HuffPost:

Top 20 States For Interracial Dating (INFOGRAPHIC)

But this is an even more comprehensive and current breakdown of stats by race and combos of races, and this is their list of the states with the highest rates of interracial marriage:
Hawaii

Nevada

New Mexico

Oklahoma

Washington

Oregon

California

Alaska (really?!)

Arizona

Texas

Florida
And the States with the Highest Interracial Marriages Are... - Beyond Black & White

This article is really worth reading.
This list doesn't surprise me due to their demographics in relation to who is more likely to intermarry(Hispanics and Asians). Those 2 groups have higher percentages in most of these states listed in relation to other states.
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Old 08-14-2016, 03:53 PM
 
1,462 posts, read 1,427,829 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ckhthankgod View Post
This list doesn't surprise me due to their demographics in relation to who is more likely to intermarry(Hispanics and Asians). Those 2 groups have higher percentages in most of these states listed in relation to other states.
Yeh I also saw that.

American Indian has 3x more the inter marriage rates and you can see in that list that the top states have the highest percentage of American Indians.
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Old 08-14-2016, 04:55 PM
 
Location: South
253 posts, read 304,548 times
Reputation: 690
Yeah, Atlanta is a strange city sometimes. One of my closest friends is black, has lived here her entire life and before she met me, she had never been to a 'white' person's house. She's had several white acquaintances, but definitely not anyone she'd count as friend. Even just as friends, people definitely side eye us all the time. We've received a lot of questions wondering why we're even friends. I've had an interracial relationship here and it was pretty difficult.

I'd be reluctant to take advice from those who have never actually been in an interracial relationship. It's easy to say that you know an interracial couple and they don't have any issues, but often you probably don't know the true story. Unless they are your closest confidants and you've had deep, meaningful conversations about race with them, you just really don't know. I don't get into race discussions with everyone I know, even when directly asked.

So, as someone who has been in interracial relationships I'll chime in. For best bang for your dollar and better race relationships, I'll agree with several others and suggest Texas. Now, the political climate in Texas can be stomach churning, but in terms of navigating race and interracial relationships, several of the cities can be comfortable. Houston would be top choice, after that San Antonio. You're going to experience some intense racial conflicts outside of these cities, especially in East Texas where being brown in many of the small towns can be dangerous. But staying in the cities will be fine.

Outside of the south and the Northwest and with some higher COL, the Northeast will be your next best bet. You can check out some of the smaller cities first. Pittsburgh over Philadelphia, Worcester or even Springfield over Boston, etc. Another option might actually be Cleveland and to a lesser extent Columbus. I don't have personal experience there but do have a close friend with whom I have many deep conversations about race and she has been pleasantly pleased with things in these two Ohio cities with her interracial marriage.

On a final note, if you must be a religious theist and spend a lot of time socializing through church, you might consider more progressive sects. They tend to have a better educated congregation and that can help mitigate the bigotry you experience outside your religious social groups.
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Old 08-14-2016, 08:02 PM
 
Location: Wonderland
67,650 posts, read 60,875,858 times
Reputation: 101078
Quote:
Originally Posted by ckhthankgod View Post
This list doesn't surprise me due to their demographics in relation to who is more likely to intermarry(Hispanics and Asians). Those 2 groups have higher percentages in most of these states listed in relation to other states.
This map is very interesting:
http://www.beyondblackwhite.com/wp-c...630d9c0c1b.jpg

According to this map, the southern states have the highest PERCENTAGE of newlyweds married to someone of another race - 39 percent. This includes all combos of races. In the South, black/other marriages account for 51 percent of those interracial marriages. Thirty five percent are Hispanic/other.

The west has by far the highest percentage of Asian/other marriages - no surprise there. The west also has the highest percentage of Hispanic/other.

The northeast has the lowest percentages across the board of interracial marriages of any combination.
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Old 08-14-2016, 08:53 PM
 
Location: OC
12,824 posts, read 9,541,088 times
Reputation: 10620
You know OP, when I read the title of your post, I thought "ok, another whiny guy who thinks people give a crap about interracial dating." I was wrong. I believe you and owe you an apology and I'm pretty sad. I wouldn't think this is common in Atlanta as it's a huge city that's pretty diverse. I'm sure if you were black the dude wouldn't have said anything though. South gonna south.
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