State-Regional Jokes (appointed, amusement park, credit)

[Charleston Class]

In South Carolina: I'd rather be dead in Charleston, than rich in Columbia or famous in Greenville.

[StuckPA]

That reminds me of W.C. Fields' tombstone- "All things considered,I'd rather be in Philadelphia"...
I think he should've reconsidered

[jtur88]

There's a joke about the Platte River, in Nebraska. Too thick to drink and too thin to plow.

There is also a river joke about the haughty superiority of Charlestonians, in South Caroolina. They say the Cooper and Ashley Rivers meet in Charleston to form the Atlantic Ocean.

[hdwell]

Originally Posted by Charleston Class

In South Carolina: I'd rather be dead in Charleston, than rich in Columbia or famous in Greenville.

Now that's funny!

[StuckPA]

Originally Posted by hdwell

Now that's funny!

You gotta say it like Larry- 'I don't care who ya are,that's funny right there'

[TheJickler]

This is kinda generic and outdated but:

You know you're from Long Island when...

1. You feel like you know Howard Stern.

2. You live in the shadow of the greatest city in the world, but you almost never go there.

3. When you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.

4. You know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.

5. You've been to Jones Beach Field 4 on a June weekend afternoon.

6. You've been to the Tanger Outlets and came home with nothing to show for it.

7. You're still waiting for a bridge to Connecticut.

8. You've tried to use your father's monthly ticket to ride the LIRR, it worked.

9. You'd pay $8.50 for a movie.

10. You've never really fully evaluated the meaning of the name Hicksville.

11. You know where the Commack Motor Inn is but you "have never been ther".

12. You've never been to Times Square on New Year's Eve.

13. You've tried to find the Amityville Horror house.

14. No, you don't want mustard on that burger!

15. You have or someone you know has fallen asleep on the LIRR and ended up in one of these three places; Babylon, Port Washington or Hicksville.

16. How many times can you use the word "like" in a sentence?

17. The most exciting day of your summer is when all the tickets go on sale for the Jones Beach Theater.

18. You went to an elementary school that promoted dodge ball as the number 1 game among children 7-13.

19. You know White Castle is terrible for you and the food sucks but you periodically "Get the Crave".

20. You have been to Mulcahay's on Thanksgiving Eve, the largest ladies night event of every year.

21. You want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.

22. You can order a whole pizza and a soda and people understand.

23. You've missed that "Drunk Train", the 2:42 out of Penn and had the dreaded wait until 5:30.

24. You've never taken an MTA bus.

25. You felt slighted when Snapple sold out.

26. You have been to the Coliseum to see the Circus (the one with the 3 rings, not the Islanders)

27. The Long Island Expressway isn't really as bad as everybody thinks.

28. You saw a movie at the Westbury Drive In before they tore it down.

29. You have been to the Roosevelt Field before the second level was completed.

30. You don't associate Fire Island with gay men.

31. When you hear Billy Joel's "Scenes From An Italian Restaurant" you try to figure out what places on Long Island he singing about.

32. You know which parts of the Godfather where filmed on Long Island.

33. You've said stupid things like "strong island".

34. You've paid a $10 cover charge to get into a bar, but got nothing for it.

35. You think religion doesn't affect you much.

36. You miss wiffleball and running through sprinklers.

37. You think Islip MacArthur airport is cute and you enjoy watching it grow up.

38. You always likes Billy Joel, but as soon as you leave, you love Billy Joel.

39. You think that Jones Beach Theater or the nassau Coliseum is the best place to see a concert.

40. Billy Joel said it best, "either you date a rich girl from the North Shore, or a cool girl from the South Shore".

41. You don;t really see the big deal about the Hamptons, unless you were at the Bordy barn.

42. You think if you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.

43. You don't go to Manhattan, you go to "The City".

44. You never realize you have an accent till you leave.

45. At some point in your life you've gone clamming.

46. You curse. A lot.

47. If your parents didn't, you're grandparents lived in the city.

48. At some point in your life you or someone you know has gotten an animal that came from the North Shore Animal League.

49. When people ask "where are you from?" you answer Long Guy Land and automatically assume everyone in the world knows that answer means New York.

50. You read all fifty of these!

[Charleston Class]

Originally Posted by jtur88

There's a joke about the Platte River, in Nebraska. Too thick to drink and too thin to plow.

There is also a river joke about the haughty superiority of Charlestonians, in South Caroolina. They say the Cooper and Ashley Rivers meet in Charleston to form the Atlantic Ocean.

Hey it's true, lol. I almost forgot about that one.

[Iconographer]

Alabama jokes have always been around in Georgia.

Why do the pines bend westward in GA?
Because AL sucks

What's the best thing to come out of AL?
I-20

Why are there no drive-by shootings in AL?
Because the houses are on wheels and the cars are on blocks

What has 14 breasts and 5 teeth?
The University of AL cheerleading team

Why was Mississippi created?
To give AL some self-esteem

[terryclinker]

Originally Posted by jtur88

In Milwaukee, drivers with Illinois plates are called FIBs. The 'I' stands for Illinois, I leave the rest to your imagination.

Friendly Illinois Buddys


Everytime a West Virginian makes a Deep South joke, an Ohioan makes and West Virginia joke, everytime an Ohioan makes a West Virginia joke, Michiganders and New Yorkers make Ohio jokes.

[hdwell]

Sign at Texas/Louisiana border (and this ones old too) welcome from the state of Texas to the state of Taxes! Hehe