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There are many people who "discover" fur coats in thrift stores and wear them happily and proudly! I always try to think of what my Mom would want done with her possessions, and I know she'd want someone who appreciated them and could make good use of them. I discovered her old sewing kit in her closet, a fabulous memento from the 60's/70's with perfectly good sewing needles, threads, scraps of fabric, etc. I asked on Facebook if any of my friends could make use of it, and someone immediately said she sews and would love it. It wasn't family, and it was actually more of an acquaintance, but the important thing is, she can use it, and that would have made my Mom happy. I gave her pearl necklace to a beloved niece, because I've never been a "pearl person" and knew my cousin loved pearls. But I've kept weird things like her orthopedic shoes that she hated so much -- they just make me smile, as we spent so much time on trying to find her "comfortable shoes".
Anyway, if you're not going to wear it and the coat's in good shape, you might want to consider thrift-shopping it and bringing a smile to someone's face when they find a "hidden treasure" and wear it to their next dressy affair. :-)
My mom inherited some things over the years from her father and grandmother. She has her grandmothers secretary, coffee grinder, Iron, toaster. She gave me her grandmothers cast iron pot with lid recently. She has 2 vases given to her by my grandfather that he got as wedding presents. Even though great memories and photos are more precious to me than material things I do appreciate what she gave me,I even cooked in the pot. I also have her grandmothers meat cleaver and hand chopper. She already told me the secretary is mine when she passes and I would treasure it but "People" are more important to me than "Things."
I am in the process of cleaning out the house my deceased husband and I built together 40 years ago, with an eye to putting it on the market and moving to another state. I still have boxes of momentos from when I was a kid, and thousands of drawings my children did, as well as the usual detrius resulting from 40 years of living in one home.
Anything that makes me feel good when I look at it is being photographed or scanned. I am keeping just one small bin of momentos. Looking at the images triggers the happy memories, and hopefully I will be able to seriously reduce the amount of things I'll be moving when I sell the house.
I have spent the past few days clearing out my office and file cabinets of years of paperwork. Since my Mom died, I now have an eye toward the burden I would leave for my Executor going through all this unnecessary junk like 20 years' worth of performance appraisals or 10 years of bank statements. (I did find some things that made me smile, though....those I kept.) Now I have the chore of finding some Shred-it Day somewhere...EVERYTHING had your Social on it back then.
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
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I had the same kind of eye-opening experience after dh died and I was cleaning out the house to get it ready to sell. I looked at things from my kids point of view. What would they do with photos, souvenirs, knick-knacks, etc., and my answers surprised me. Most of the things I loved, that had warm memories would probably mean nothing to them. With that viewpoint in mind, I was really able to pare down so much and keep just a few things from each trip, holiday, birthday or other event that was extremely special to me, but wouldn't be overwhelming for the kids to go through after I'm gone. I'll probably move at least once more before I'm in the 'home' or gone, so I'll pare down even more probably.
My spouse and I are in the process of making a DVD for my kids when we're gone, listing the items that are important to us and why, or the value of certain things (my "boys" are 32 and 35 and wouldn't know Depression glass from a green Coke bottle). We're not that old, but I am in the process of de-gunking my own life and getting rid of knick knacks that mean nothing in the grander scheme of things. I remember when my grandmother died her house was simply overwhelming from 4000 square feet of stuff she'd hauled around for years and years. I wondered then why she kept some of the things she did - did it have a special memory or was it just in a box because she couldn't part with it at the time of the last move?
What my kids do with this stuff is up to them, but they at least need to know where it came from and maybe why we held onto it. Everything has a story at our house, LOL. And they know the story behind most of it, and while the story may not mean anything to them even though it does to us, I'd hate to see them give away or sell something that later clicks in their head and they realize what they got rid of.
They hate it when we talk this way, but it's life and death and it's practical. I will say, though - nothing would make me happier than to see them give some items they feel they have no need for to an animal shelter or other worthwhile cause to raise funds, start a new home for someone who has had a disaster in their life, or something along those lines. That would make me really happy.
I'm truly sorry for everyone's loss, but I am finding comfort in reading everyone's experiences and tips. Thank you for taking the time to share. Feel free to keep posting.
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