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Somehow some way I "stumble" through each day...Sometimes things look "bleak" and "black" and even hopeless!...I've been at the very "edge" of a breakdown many times lately. I've had to deal with lots of traumas all in a row with no chance to recover. I can't believe I am still "here" and "kicking."...I'm hoping that there will be a "rainbow" waiting for me at the end of all these "storms" and an all-expenses-paid vacation to a "dream location" of my choice...I keep on going for my son and my two cats and my son's two cats...I need to be the "rock" of the family right now and stay strong. I can't "bail out!" Everyone depends on me. How can my son recover from his brain tumors if I have a breakdown or get physically sick? Who would take care of the cats? Who would "cheer" my son "on" and help him stay strong? We don't have any other immediate family left. So we have to stay strong for each other no matter what! I just can't "afford" to have a breakdown!
dreamofmonterey...I'm sorry you lost your Mom so suddenly and when she was so young...My Mom has a massive heart attack and died instantly. (There was no warning either.) It's sad! Anyway I'm really sorry.
I can’t imagine being an elderly person and having bad news from the doctors about a spouse. I do believe that when it comes to health care and the worst possible news about and illness like cancer, people will do just about anything to include what this old man did in Vegas. There is nothing worse then seeing a loved one (young or old) having to deal with cancer treatments.
The breaking point for me is health issues and family members who are ill with nothing that can be done to correct it!
My Grandfather had to take the news that his wife of 50+ years had leukemia, and back then there was nothing to be done about it. He stayed strong for her. I don't know how one deals with such grief, but he just did. He had a lot of family and community support, religious support, etc. All I can say is, build a network now to lean on in such times.
dreamofmonterey...I'm sorry you lost your Mom so suddenly and when she was so young...My Mom has a massive heart attack and died instantly. (There was no warning either.) It's sad! Anyway I'm really sorry.
Thank u friend I am glad you have your son. he is blessed to be so strong.
regarding the OP, I hate how the media portrays crises like this...everything is fodder for ratings and money these days, there is no humanity with how human issues and tragedies are treated. Our society was alot healthier 20 years ago when "infotainment" news wasnt blaring all day on peoples tv.
Yes yesterday. I hadnt been able to get out for 3 days due to the anxiety and ptsd stuff, then my car blows a head gasket, have to deal with unfriendly people in a small town, and the car aint worth fixing though loved by me and was a unique 4x4 van I needed in the winter here. The mechanic just walks away leaving me there talking to myself, I then have to go walk maybe 8 blks to get groceries, not that far but I was very dizzy and felt like I could black out at any time. My other car needs work and while drivable now I will need stuff done right away and I wanted to put that off till toward summer, now I have to hurry up and get it fixed, as I live 20 miles from a town and have to have a car I can depend on. I have no idea where to take it, as I've not found anyone good around here even though they all charge 60 an hour. Why did I even go to college? Oh and I have a dog with terminal cancer, she still came over and put her head on me when I got back, shes so sweet. And dealing with back taxes and lawyers cuz of the exfriend that stole most of my life savings. And the real icing on the cake is having nobody, no friends/family in this world to lend a hand, no one willing to even give me a ride back to the house. Cost 140 to have my car towed back here. Zero compassion and kindness from people, its like talking to a stone. Having severe depression and riding the edge anyway, the more it rains the more it pushes one to throw in the towel. I get this nervous exhaustion after something more that pushes me to the edge I get extremely tired and then wake being hardly able to walk. While some might say it all seems trivial, thats easy to say when not knowing the whole thing and not walking in that persons shoes. All the Pollyana stuff about being positive is fine talk (and I believe in trying) but real facts, large situational stuff, being alone, and being a disabled vet and sick, trumps that.
toddOO...I'm so sorry about your car. Sorry that you live in an uncaring and unfriendly area. I can relate...My area is basically like this too. I went through a "rude awakening" after my husband passed away.
wow, todd...so sorry. Also re: your dog. Mine have given great comfort at times. I'd die without the shar-peis.
Your area is like florida...break down on the road, you are on your own!. Happened before they had cell phones too in west Miami.
I am not a pollyanna by any means, but there are some good people around, sometimes its very hard to find them though. I sort of depend on myself as Im not the type to ask a neighbor for even a cup of sugar when I need it...I dont like asking for help when things are bad. (expect less from others and you wont be disappointed...)
dreamofmonterey...I'm like you. It's hard for me to ask anyone for help. I try to be as self-sufficent as I possibly can! But there are times when we all need help with something. (Whether we like it or not!) And this is where it's nice (and better) to live in a caring and supportive area. Don't you think?
wow, todd...so sorry. Also re: your dog. Mine have given great comfort at times. I'd die without the shar-peis.
Your area is like florida...break down on the road, you are on your own!. Happened before they had cell phones too in west Miami.
I am not a pollyanna by any means, but there are some good people around, sometimes its very hard to find them though. I sort of depend on myself as Im not the type to ask a neighbor for even a cup of sugar when I need it...I dont like asking for help when things are bad. (expect less from others and you wont be disappointed...)
Actually even when I lost power to the house in an ice storm I didnt ask for help. With the animals I couldnt go to a motel, so I had to slip slide 40 miles and buy a generator for 500 bucks so I could power a couple space heaters till it could be fixed. I dont have a wood stove unfortuately. Thing is I was the only one to lose it around this area, people drove by and no one stopped to ask if I was ok. They could easily see the line off down from the house. I think thats how rural neighbors used to be, maybe still are in a few places, but not here. I have no problem with doing for myself, everyone would prefer that to asking for help, but it does make ya feel sad when ya know there is no friend or family to call if something does happen, say even needing a ride. The larger issue is not having caring family/friends. And many have that problem.
I mentioned my dog before, she had a stroke and was getting better then had right side heart failure one night. I rushed her to the vet late that nite but she died in the car. She was a stray living in a field. I have a Great Pyrenees I rescued off the interstate, she has cancer, started in her ear canal and they tried to get it but couldnt get it all and its grown back there and on the side of her head. She is still eating and I'm supplementing herbs too hoping to slow it down but she wont beat it, and shes been such a help to me. When I'd be upset she would stand against the wall and then rub her head on me like she was trying to stand and hug me. Yesterday she came over and put her head on my lap, poor girl, sick and all and still giving. I've taken in strays for more than 25 yrs so I've seen most everything and had to deal with death a lot too, and always alone. You can be used to dealing with stuff alone that doesn't mean you have to like it. As wonderful as pets are it amazes me that this country hasn't come further in curbing pet over population, and the damn puppy mills. I love cats too and worked hard breaking up feral cat colonies. My oldest 2 cats were feral cats.
I didnt mean you by the Pollyana comment but some people just dont get the depth of things and act like we're talking about having a bad day now and then or the blues despite life being good. This is a whole nother animal than that.
I can certainly relate to an unexpected car problem bringing you to a breaking point, as for many, it's your lifeline, like your next paycheck, especially if you're in a rural area, with no public transit as an option.
I make $13.17 an hour and I just can't figure it out how a mechanic can charge $60-$80 an hour to repair a car! And what has brought me more to the breaking point, with car repairs, if you pay out good $$ to get it fixed, and it wasn't fixed properly, and face a return trip!
That's the part that can send me over the breaking point!
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I am glad you have your son
