Hello there, my name is Winnie Francis (a derivative of my actual name and not my name all in full.) I am a teenager and young man almost up for my start on the adult life. Also, I tend to use grammar and vocabulary consistent with that of an educated geriatric. This could be either admirable to some but it is slightly annoying among my peers (they aren't bad people; they just think I need to get with the times.) I'll eventually revert back to a standard and modern form of English throughout the course of our series of posts (provided that this thread catches on and I hope this does as this is an actual question that I put a considerable amount of effort into asking.)
This is my first post on the City-Data forums. I was unsure if there was a formal way of introducing oneself to this community (how do you throw a block party or deliver a pie through the Internets) so please forgive my ignorance on forum culture. I actually have been stalking the City-Data forum for years now and I just recently decided to create and account as I always have and had questions regarding these subjects that go and went unanswered. My appreciation for American cities or the idea of major cities as a whole is rather a sentimental one and not uncommon to my philosophical nature (my father was a humanities student when I was a child and this was quite instrumental to my intellectual upbringing.) I love how cities have their own personality, persona, culture, historical significance and history, meaning, industry, architecture, people adhering to that city, demographics, and attributes that stand alone to itself. So this forum is realistically a fit one for me as well
.
Onto business; I have an issue here that I must consult all of you to resolve. In order to address this issue in context, I'll have to bring in a bit of my personal history. My father's a New York guy (that's a term he likes using) with the accent, the culture and the association. In other words, he is a Sicilian New Yorker in the whole 9 yards. He joined up with the American Navy as a fresh faced young man in order to steer away from the Bronx and establish a stable life and career. In this period of time, he met my mother here in California. So on and so forth, families are created and history is enabled. He bought a house on a horrible foundation of finance and poor judgement. Eventually when the recession struck, we almost lost our house but conveniently to an extent but tragically in another; there was a mix-up with the sale and deed of the house that was brought to court and we won the right to the house. This was also within a year or so when my father retired from the Navy after a good 20 years. His original plan was to bring us back to New York but then the former happened.
Another issue to bring before I ask the question is about my sister. She is currently 20 years old and has always been controversial with my family. She always had conflict with my parents and siblings, she was emotionally hurtful to me and my younger brother, and she was always out with friends doing drugs and the like. I say my family as she is barely a part of my family anymore because she has crossed us both emotionally and financially numerous times that would take decades to forgive. Now, my father is a certified genius (somewhere in the 160's) and it is suspected that me and her have inherited this. Unrelated and inconsistent with the flow of this paragraph, me and my father (who fancy ourselves amateur psychiatrists) suspect her of being a narcissist but I will not go into that out of fear that I might offend somebody. She owes us and several people thousands of dollars (maybe up to 15 collectively) and we know that she has no personal responsibility to pay her debts.
She left the house at 16 years old and ran away to Los Angeles with her boyfriend (who is an amazing person that she took advantage of; He remains a friend to the family.) She "borrowed" our car that was still being payed off by my parents. This is damaging even more as she is a very unreliable driver and got about 2-4 parking tickets a month that my father had to pay as the car was still in his name. She even had plans to give it to her friend of whom had no real relation to us instead of giving it back to the rightful owners. Thankfully, the latter happened and I just inherited a car
. Pseudologia Fantastica. She continues to lie about her own life in order to make herself sound more interesting and she is an amazing manipulator as she exploits her physical beauty (not to brag but we all came out GORGEOUS hahaha) in order to get what she wants but doesn't need. Aside from my younger brother who is still a bit naive, we all don't trust her or believe near anything she tells us. Apparently she was a business woman but I know that she didn't achieve her position (in some kind of casting company) honestly. I think this is a complete lie but she left Los Angeles to escape from her roommate who apparently, but we have no evidence, would hurt her and beat on her physically.
The reason that I think her relationship with that roommate is a lie is because (like I said before, we don't trust her) I think it was a pretty damn convenient way to escape her debts and her failing relationship with the company that she partners with. Here's the kicker, she is mooching off of my uncles and grandmother as she ran away to... NEW YORK where she immediately (within the first week) found her way into a company of Manhattan gentrifiers (this is either a lie or it may be true as she
is manipulative.) Now unlike her, my plan in life (if I'm not fit to join the military as I'm bipolar [(as my other sister, my mother and her mother is)]) is to move to a major city become a firefighter (as like the military: your covered in the wimminz, you get a pretty sharp uniform, a rank, and a pension) and to live a working class life as I assimilate into the population, marry a local, and produce dozens of babies and raise them people of the city as opposed to the general American that could be placed anywhere in the states and can blend in.
I am so sorry that half of this post has become a rant piece on my sister but my family is aware of it and I wanted to vent that out just a bit. Not only that, it was very important as it is a major factor as to why I have this question. Is New York worth it? Is it worth my time, the rest of my life, the life of my family, & my history? I have the 3 options (others were considered but were never set on); I could fit Plan B into either Philadelphia, Chicago, or New York. New York is an option as I have family there and I am aware of that culture already. Chicago is an option as I am from the West but I am half of the East and Chicago is a mixture of the two with a culture and persona independent to itself. Philadelphia is an option as, like Chicago, it would be a clean slate where I could grow my own culture and history; aside from that, I admire Philadelphia's architecture and history. I also think it would be pretty damn cool if my kids are Philly guys. But every time I think about Chicago and Philadelphia, I am continuously seduced by a personified Wimminz version of New York. Aside from the fact that 2 Boroughs would belong to the gentrifiers (if not all) within the next 20 years; since New York culture has seeped through American culture so much, you eventually come under the guise that New York has no culture. This could be compared to the main character on a TV show as the main character is rarely anyone's favorite since you are thrown into the though and ideas of him or her for the longest time and therefore become the character. The major deterrent though is my sister of whom I want to cut from my life.
Somewhat related; the typical definition of a gentrifier is someone who moves to that area out of an admiration for the culture and amenities that it has to offer. Say you are an artist, actor, or bohemian who moved to New York for the art scene. They eventually realize that they cannot afford the place where it is all typically set. This way, they move to a smaller neighborhood, preferably near where they want to be, because the rent and cost of living is cheaper as it is a working class neighborhood with the Bar that all the locals go after work or to watch a White Sox or Cubs/Phillies/Yankees or Mets game. These people are typically not married and childless so the quality of the schools are not factored in and they believe that common sense would keep them safe any day (if the neighborhood is unsafe.) These neighborhoods also have some kind of admirable aspect to them whether it be the 19th-Early 20th century brownstone town homes or some kind of historical event. These gentrifiers then renovate their building and open up and art boutique or a swanky restaurant. Other people raised in a different social class (like the first person) pick that neighborhood for a similar reason and then follow suit. Eventually, that neighborhood becomes the epicenter to some kind of art movement or scene and the rent is raised in the area forcing the original inhabitants of whom lived there all of their life and hold sentiment and memories in that area, out.
I guess I have to clear up on Plan B on how I can avoid being a gentrifier. I'll eventually become the local and avoid opening up that art boutique
. I'll pick a neighborhood that is still attractive but is not the typical bait for the gentry (somewhere in the Bronx, Deep Southside, or South Philly.) And like I said, marry a local and raise my kids locals as I live in the comfortable working class. That may sound flawed as people believe that there is no way to not be a gentrifier but at least in well-thought theory, it could work. Right so the final question is: Am I destined for New York or would it be wise if I go Philadelphia or Chicago? What may be your's or my reasoning behind this city? Will my plan work? To any locals, does that sound like a bad idea? Is New York big enough to totally disappear from my sister? Is this entire plan wise or will I have to be parented on how it's not? My father would obviously advise me to go New York but he wouldn't want to hear the problems that I could potentially have with it. I
need your feedback oh dear City-Data.
Please Respond,
Captain Trinacria (Winnie Francis)
P.S: Some of the things I said here may or may not be controversial, stigmatizing, or alienating but please excuse any of that. This is a legitimate question that I need help on. Also, if you read through the entire essay (
) and took the time to respond, I commend you and you deserve eternal bliss.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I mean other kinds of people (particularly gentrifiers) go to New York for materialistic reasons because they would have a great friggin' time doing whatever they want in New York. I don't need that experience. I actually appreciate the culture and history of New York and not just because its the largest city in America "with all this awesome stuff in it!" Also, unlike me where I have a real plan and an actual connection to this city, other guys just want to go to New York because it's New York! *Jazz Hands*. I could just as easily get that experience in Philly or Chi-town (that is, if I went for a vain reason.) Other guys have no completely legitimate business being there and they just slap down picked it because "it would be cool." (The former being in the situation where they want to go to college or whatever which is not the path I want to take.) Also, I tried my best not to come off as that guy. Like I said, bear with me here 
.
