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Need advice. I need to know if I have enough ammo to talk to my wife about some of the stuff that my MIL has been saying. I also want to talk to my MIL and let her know how uneasy I feel about what I perceive to be her flirting.
But I need to know if this is appropriate for a mother in law to be saying to her son in law:
"I was going to take a pic of you shirtless while working in the yard to send to your wife"
"take off your shirt tomorrow, don't be shy. I wanna see that shirt off"
to daughter: "if you mess things up with him, I'm keeping him"
to me: "tell my daughter I'll trade her men", says this while slightly touching down the lower end of my back.
She also has been making it a point to tell me how the relationship with her husband is dead, and that he is not "getting any" from her.
I mean is this all normal stuff that a mother in law tells her son in law? Is this just her being friendly? She said some of this stuff when she was drunk, so could I chalk it up to the alcohol?
Point is do I have enough to go to her to tell her that it's inappropriate or will I look like a fool?
Not normal or acceptable. I probably would say to any of her comments regarding her own relationship: "Hey, don't tell me that stuff....I don't wanna know that!" and to any comments about trading or touching...."Hey, I'm not cool with that - don't even go there!"
You need to be direct, and look her in the eye. Be a man, and handle it yourself...don't talk to your wife about it unless you have directly dealt with it and she still has not backed off.
You're not 15 years old. Grow up and learn to ignore. It's not like she's going to rape you when you are asleep. Keep a distance and avoid her. Is that way too difficult?
I wouldn't tell the MIL, let your wife handle that if she sees fit. But, make sure your wife knows what is going on so you don't end up with some false accusations.
You're not 15 years old. Grow up and learn to ignore. It's not like she's going to rape you when you are asleep. Keep a distance and avoid her. Is that way too difficult?
Geez, guys I wasn't saying I was scared to talk to her about it, I was wondering if the stuff she says is friendly or being really flirty in an inappropriate way? I needed to know if so, so I can have a chat with her about it.
So in your opinions, she is crossing the line and venturing into heavy flirting territory? This isn't about being nice or friendly anymore?
Geez, guys I wasn't saying I was scared to talk to her about it, I was wondering if the stuff she says is friendly or being really flirty in an inappropriate way? I needed to know if so, so I can have a chat with her about it.
So in your opinions, she is crossing the line and venturing into heavy flirting territory? This isn't about being nice or friendly anymore?
Flirting is flirting only if the act is mutual either way. Otherwise, it's one-sided, empty and harmless.
Are you sexually attracted to wife's mom? That's the question.
It's hard to say if she's being friendly, or seedy.
I guess it depends on what type of person she is, and the spirit in which she means it.
If she's just having a misguided attempt at humour, then it's best to try to nip it in the bud.
If she's being genuine, then you have a problem.
As someone else said, make sure you talk to your wife first.
You need her on your side, get her to watch her mother to see if she can see it too, just in case you're being a bit paranoid or oversensitive.
I know how you feel tho, a few years back I dated someone 16 years younger than me. Her mother made absolutely no secret of the fact that she wanted me for herself. It made me totally uncomfortable. I shared it with my g/f and she agreed. It did eventually calm down after a year or so of dating as we all got to know each other, we didn't have to say anything.
It just meant I tried to avoid her mother if she'd had a couple of glasses of wine !
It wasn't serious enough to class as harassment, so we just decided to ignore it, but it could get a bit tiring.
I definitely feel your pain.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jude999
Geez, guys I wasn't saying I was scared to talk to her about it, I was wondering if the stuff she says is friendly or being really flirty in an inappropriate way? I needed to know if so, so I can have a chat with her about it.
So in your opinions, she is crossing the line and venturing into heavy flirting territory? This isn't about being nice or friendly anymore?
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