Women, do you compliment other women without meaning it? (female, male, person)
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It might just be me, but it seems that women call other women pretty and cute all the time without actually meaning it. This would be in situations where you are NOT directly asked.
Like someone will show a female friend a picture of their friend or coworker or whatever, and they will be like, "Oh. She's so pretty." without even being asked their opinion.
Or walk through someone's house and see a picture of their sister, and they'll be like, "Oh, she's so cute."
Obviously, men never do this.
And I noticed women only do it for women. They never do it for men.
Is it like a female support group? Or is it all in my head?
If I give a compliment then I mean it. If I don't mean it, then I won't just say something nice about someone's appearance for the heck of it.
Why is it that we're expected to automatically compliment people's appearances when we're shown pictures of other people's friends/family members/etc? Why can't we just say something like, "Nice picture" or "He/she seems nice" instead of being expected to say "She's pretty" when she might not be physically attractive?
I dont. I rarely give compliments. If I do it may be about shoes, hair, makeup, etc. If someone isn't attractive I'm not going to pull a bs comment out of my a** just for the he** of it.
My compliments are rarely appearance-related. I compliment my coworkers a lot on their accomplishments, skill, doing a great job with a particular student, etc. But I don't really focus on "Hey, that skirt is really cute," or "Your hair looks nice," as a rule. I guess I've just always been more conditioned to focus on accomplishments and personality traits, etc.
A friend of mine who lives in another state recently started a new relationship, and posted a pic of him and his new SO on facebook. I wrote him that I wanted to hear all about her, knowing that if he's dating her, she must be a pretty cool person. I noticed that most other people posted about her appearance, etc. It struck me that it hadn't even occurred to me to make a "Aww, cute!" comment, even if that is the social norm. Not that she's not cute, but I'm more curious about what she's like.
this probably occurs because men don't have to walk through supermarkets and see magazine after magazine focused on how they should and/or could look better or become better overall. if they did, maybe they would feel the need to boost up another guy's appearance just for the hell of it. It's probably an automatic reaction on the part of most women b/c of how we're conditioned by society to be so into looks. I don't necessarily think it's a conscious effort to lie to someone.
With that said, I rather not say anything at all then say something that's not true, but yes, I have done this and like I said it's probably a knee jerk reaction.
It might just be me, but it seems that women call other women pretty and cute all the time without actually meaning it. This would be in situations where you are NOT directly asked.
Like someone will show a female friend a picture of their friend or coworker or whatever, and they will be like, "Oh. She's so pretty." without even being asked their opinion.
Or walk through someone's house and see a picture of their sister, and they'll be like, "Oh, she's so cute."
Obviously, men never do this.
And I noticed women only do it for women. They never do it for men.
Is it like a female support group? Or is it all in my head?
idk. I must have missed the compliment memo. I never give one I don't mean. I give men compliments too, like, "OOooh, nice tie!", or "That's a great color on you! Really sets off your blond hair." These are not men I have any personal interest in. Giving deserved compliments are a gift, like a day-brightener. I believe in committing random acts of kindness.
I've never been shown a photo of someone and complimented the person in the photo. Never occurred to me. I would assume that if people say "she's cute", or whatever, they mean it. Otherwise, why bother? The OP makes me feel like I missed something in the socialization process. When I say something, I mean it. Otherwise, I don't say anything. Is that unusual?
My compliments are rarely appearance-related. I compliment my coworkers a lot on their accomplishments, skill, doing a great job with a particular student, etc. But I don't really focus on "Hey, that skirt is really cute," or "Your hair looks nice," as a rule. I guess I've just always been more conditioned to focus on accomplishments and personality traits, etc.
A friend of mine who lives in another state recently started a new relationship, and posted a pic of him and his new SO on facebook. I wrote him that I wanted to hear all about her, knowing that if he's dating her, she must be a pretty cool person. I noticed that most other people posted about her appearance, etc. It struck me that it hadn't even occurred to me to make a "Aww, cute!" comment, even if that is the social norm. Not that she's not cute, but I'm more curious about what she's like.
Tab: I bet occasionally you might say to a buddy, "Hey, sharp suit!" Something like that. Certainly not as often as women do, but women are into clothes, and more into appearance than guys. It's normal.
Your response to your friend's pic of his s.o. makes perfect sense to me. The important thing is what kind of a person she is. Though some guys might say, "Hey, she's hot!" (if she truly is the hot type). Your response seems to me to be the mature response.
You know what else I dont get...women awing over baby pics. I'm not a kid/baby fan and dont find them cute (puppies on the other hand are a completely different story) and I always feel awkward when I dont have a reaction to someone's kid pics.
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