I have no personal chemistry with 99% of the people I meet!
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It doesn't take much to make me happy. I can literally be with my boyfriend all the time, just doing fun things with him & traveling, so I'm used to solitude. Parties & get togethers don't excite me & I don't feel like I'm missing out on something when I hear of others having parties. That's them. I'm not an attention-craver. In fact, I hate drawisng attention to myself. I prefer to stay in the background. My parents were definitely not party people either. My dad is actually a loner who never had many friends either.
I don't know if it takes a certain kind of person to be a good friend to me OR just bad circumstances that I don't have friends really...except for one besides my boyfriend.
I do not have Aspergers or any mental illness. I am an RN in a busy Emergency Department so I interact with all kinds of people on a day to day basis. I know I don't lack interpersonal skills at all. I simply don't want to have friends. I like casual acquaintances and I thoroughly enjoy my FB time with them but I don't like real time, in the flesh interaction. I too found a great outlet when I discovered the internet. I could share what I wanted, when I wanted. I don't think people like me are an anomaly. Just in this very thread I see kindred spirits. I think in many ways we are the deep thinkers who don't do well with the superficiality of life.
You made me realize that maybe I'm less social than I ever thought. Although I could enjoy interacting all day with coworkers and clients, most of the time I like to be by myself.
For example, I have never understood the concept of group shopping. I find going shopping with one or two other women torture. To go through a mall oohing and ahhing over every purse and scarf, instead of just going at my own fast clip is not at all fun.
You made me realize that maybe I'm less social than I ever thought. Although I could enjoy interacting all day with coworkers and clients, most of the time I like to be by myself.
For example, I have never understood the concept of group shopping. I find going shopping with one or two other women torture. To go through a mall oohing and ahhing over every purse and scarf, instead of just going at my own fast clip is not at all fun.
Oh trust me, I don't enjoy it. I would actually be much happier if I sat in an office all day in front of a computer and didn't have to interact with anyone. But nursing is all I know and I feel I'm too old to go and do something else. I totally agree with you about the group shopping, just ugh.
I have noticed the older I get the less interested I am in people. I'm not sure why exactly, probably a combination of factors.
I feel the same way, Djuna. Nursing provides plenty of opportunity for "people interaction". When I'm done at work, I just want to be where there are hardly any people....or alone.
Oh trust me, I don't enjoy it. I would actually be much happier if I sat in an office all day in front of a computer and didn't have to interact with anyone. But nursing is all I know and I feel I'm too old to go and do something else. I totally agree with you about the group shopping, just ugh.
I have noticed the older I get the less interested I am in people. I'm not sure why exactly, probably a combination of factors.
Maybe these are the peaks and valleys of life. Maybe the desire for relationships goes in an arch, and now I'm on the downhill. We spend the first half building relationships, and I am in long distance contact with these old friends who are precious to me, and then after that it's "been there done that", and we just want to be left alone.
I don't feel a connection to about 75% of the people I meet. I try my best to make relevant small talk, depending on the social situation and reason. I try to figure out what they are interested in to get them to converse as awkward silence can bother me.
Most of them probably are not interested in me either for the same reasons. I do what I can to be pleasant to others. If they don't care to talk to me, I make as little small talk as I can and move on to someone else more interesting. Life is way too short to fret about people who don't want to talk to you.
I am an INTJ who finally got a job where I DO sit in front of a computer all day and it suits me perfectly.
I taught, counseled, and managed for years-definitely not things I care to ever do again.
My hobbies complement my personality: writing, reading, photography, motorcycling, movies, cooking.
I have a few close friends from my past that are lifelong pals. When I want to engage in more than superficial plesantries I talk to them or come here.
This works for me. I hate social situations and avoid them. I'd rather hang with my dogs and DH.
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