How to cope with friends who move away? (wife, spouse, person)

[Wordsmith12]

I started a thread the other day about my best friend moving to a city 5-6 hours upstate. This happened over a year ago and yet I still miss him a great deal. I have only seen him once since the move -- in March, when he came down to be the best man at my wedding.

I think what makes it harder is the fact that he doesn't seem to miss me as much, but it's only because he has a lot more on his plate than I do (supporting 2 kids, his mom, and his stay-at-home wife). He's also a salesperson, which means he is meeting new people almost every day.

He doesn't like living there and wishes to move back eventually. He applied for several jobs in my city but got no responses; perhaps companies are skittish about the relocation end of it. As a result, he's chosen to stay put for now as he's entering his busy season (meaning highest commissions) at work. He intends to try again next year.

How do you cope with the void that a friend leaves when he or she moves? I guess I didn't feel it as much in months prior because I myself was busy planning the wedding and knew he would be here for the big event. Now that the wedding is behind us and we've had time to catch our breath, his absence is felt more.

I am thinking about going to visit him in a few months but I know that visiting each other once or twice a year pales in comparison to living within close proximity.

Have you been in this situation? How did you deal with it?

Do you think trying sites like meetup.com and trying to make new friends might help?

[Pitt Chick]

You make is sound like he was your only friend!

So you are married, right?
Do things with your wife.
Go out to a ball game with people... socialize.
No sense pining over what cannot be.

[Wordsmith12]

No, he isn't my only friend, but there's a reason why we differentiate friends and best friends.

I have the "deepest" friendship of all with him -- we've shared loads of personal stuff with one another over the years.

Of course I go to places with my wife. But the point is that sometimes we all need that one friend who helps us escape from the daily grind -- whom we can grab a drink with when we get into an argument with the spouse, for example.

[Pitt Chick]

And now another of your friends will have to fill that void.

You say he is your best friend but that he does not feel the same (" doesn't seem to miss me as much"). That is a sign that you may be drifting apart, as you are in different stages of your lives. That happens. Just don't get so caught up in the past that you ignore the now and the future....

[hothulamaui]

all you can do is keep in touch. emails, texts and phone calls. if you guys like sports, like football call each other with your bets on who will win.

[Serious Conversation]

Once someone moves away, it's very easy to lose real contact. Sure, you may talk to them on Facebook or something, but once physical closeness is gone, an important part of the relationship is as well.

[Jaded]

Duplicate Thread.