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My husband and I make enough to pay our bills with barely much left over.
He does not like paying too much for groceries. He would like us to have a specific budget.
When I told him about our having to bring a dish and our own drinks, he was not that happy. I asked him why. He reminded me of our budget. The reason why he wants a budget is because his sister has access to our checking account since her name is on it. That decision was made by the two of them. She has noticed in the past that our account balance was below what she felt comfortable *for example: $50*, and so she called him about that. She told him that she did not want him spending too much money. He has been working on that. What he does not want to happen is this... His sister calling him again and telling him the same thing. She is aware of our financial situation. She wants him to save money to use as a cushion for emergencies. But due to the fact that we make enough to pay our bills with barely much left over, that is difficult. We live in low income housing.
He gets frustrated when she does this. She feels that we should only spend *x* amount of money on groceries *close to the highest he spent as a single guy*, but with groceries prices the way they currently are and the fact that we have to buy for 2 people, that is difficult. We shop at Walmart every pay period, and our grocery bill for each pay period is over what his sister feels comfortable with no matter how much we buy for 2 people.
He is trying to avoid another argument with his sister. So that is why he wants us on a grocery budget.
There are other bills coming up that need to be paid for.
When I asked him if we would have the money to pay for the ingredients for the potluck dish, he said he was not sure.
He feels more comfortable being able to plan for the dish ahead of time money wise.
My husband and I make enough to pay our bills with barely much left over.
He does not like paying too much for groceries. He would like us to have a specific budget.
When I told him about our having to bring a dish and our own drinks, he was not that happy. I asked him why. He reminded me of our budget. The reason why he wants a budget is because his sister has access to our checking account since her name is on it. That decision was made by the two of them. She has noticed in the past that our account balance was below what she felt comfortable *for example: $50*, and so she called him about that. She told him that she did not want him spending too much money. He has been working on that. What he does not want to happen is this... His sister calling him again and telling him the same thing. She is aware of our financial situation. She wants him to save money to use as a cushion for emergencies. But due to the fact that we make enough to pay our bills with barely much left over, that is difficult. We live in low income housing.
He gets frustrated when she does this. She feels that we should only spend *x* amount of money on groceries *close to the highest he spent as a single guy*, but with groceries prices the way they currently are and the fact that we have to buy for 2 people, that is difficult. We shop at Walmart every pay period, and our grocery bill for each pay period is over what his sister feels comfortable with no matter how much we buy for 2 people.
He is trying to avoid another argument with his sister. So that is why he wants us on a grocery budget.
There are other bills coming up that need to be paid for.
When I asked him if we would have the money to pay for the ingredients for the potluck dish, he said he was not sure.
He feels more comfortable being able to plan for the dish ahead of time money wise.
None of this (ludicrous Mod cut.)matters. I can't even bring myself to comment on an ounce of it for fear of killing masses of brain cells I'll never get back.
Beans in a can cost $1.25. Warm them on the stove before you serve them.
Jell-o costs $.87
Crescent Rolls cost $2.50
And so on.
Drink water.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 11-17-2014 at 08:25 PM..
Reason: Inappropriate language.
My husband and I make enough to pay our bills with barely much left over.
He does not like paying too much for groceries. He would like us to have a specific budget.
When I told him about our having to bring a dish and our own drinks, he was not that happy. I asked him why. He reminded me of our budget. The reason why he wants a budget is because his sister has access to our checking account since her name is on it. That decision was made by the two of them. She has noticed in the past that our account balance was below what she felt comfortable *for example: $50*, and so she called him about that. She told him that she did not want him spending too much money. He has been working on that. What he does not want to happen is this... His sister calling him again and telling him the same thing. She is aware of our financial situation. She wants him to save money to use as a cushion for emergencies. But due to the fact that we make enough to pay our bills with barely much left over, that is difficult. We live in low income housing.
He gets frustrated when she does this. She feels that we should only spend *x* amount of money on groceries *close to the highest he spent as a single guy*, but with groceries prices the way they currently are and the fact that we have to buy for 2 people, that is difficult. We shop at Walmart every pay period, and our grocery bill for each pay period is over what his sister feels comfortable with no matter how much we buy for 2 people.
He is trying to avoid another argument with his sister. So that is why he wants us on a grocery budget.
There are other bills coming up that need to be paid for.
When I asked him if we would have the money to pay for the ingredients for the potluck dish, he said he was not sure.
He feels more comfortable being able to plan for the dish ahead of time money wise.
I'm sorry, but this is the most ridiculous bunch of brouhaha I've ever read - well, right up there anyway.
1. Get the sister off the account. You know how to do that? You and your husband just go open another account and start using it - without her on it. Easy schmeasy.
You're both adults, right? Are you mentally ill or mentally challenged in some way? I'm asking that sincerely, because that's the only reason I can think of in which someone else should possibly be on your account. My gosh.
Honestly - are either or both of you mentally challenged?
Even if you are, let's make this reallllllllllll easy:
2. Tell your husband that you will have to eat and drink whether you go to your mom's or stay home. You will have to cook a meal at home, or bring a dish to the dinner. Either one will cost you a bit of money - but honestly, the dish will probably end up costing you less than a full meal! If you don't want to bring drinks, then DRINK TAP WATER when you get there.
This is just not very difficult to figure out.
And answer the questions I asked you, please. I think "therein lies the problem."
3. If for some reason you just feel you can't do either of the above, then stay home. Please. Spare others.
I buy groceries for 2 each week as well. It is tough, sure, but I also know that life is what you make it and it doesn't matter what is on the table. It's the people around the table. I had pizza and cake for my birthday this past year with 7 of the closest people in my life. And you know what? It didn't matter that it was pizza and cake. Because in the end, all that is left is memories.
Does your husband's sister not have a relationship with the mother? Is she invited to the potluck?
Why does your sister in law have her name on an account with the two of you? Could you two not obtain an account together or just one of you?
If you are on low-income housing, I assume you are on food stamps? Or if not you have access to a food pantry via a church or food bank.
Why do you and your husband share a bank account with his sister?
Go to the food bank if money is as tight as you say it is. A casserole for a potluck will not cost anymore then a meal at home. Can you talk to your mom and request that you bring a lower cost dish. You could make rolls or biscuits from scratch for a lot of people for a couple of dollars. Same for stuffing or mashed potatoes. And like someone else suggested, you do not have to bring your own beverage assuming your mom has tap water.
I suspect that this has absolutely nothing to do with money though. I suspect that money is just being used as the excuse to make an issue over Thanksgiving at your mom's house. I hope that you will realize this and stand up to your husband.
Why do you and your husband share a bank account with his sister?
Go to the food bank if money is as tight as you say it is. A casserole for a potluck will not cost anymore then a meal at home. Can you talk to your mom and request that you bring a lower cost dish. You could make rolls or biscuits from scratch for a lot of people for a couple of dollars. Same for stuffing or mashed potatoes. And like someone else suggested, you do not have to bring your own beverage assuming your mom has tap water.
I suspect that this has absolutely nothing to do with money though. I suspect that money is just being used as the excuse to make an issue over Thanksgiving at your mom's house. I hope that you will realize this and stand up to your husband.
True dat.
What I find hard to believe is that the OP, who is apparently in her forties, can't see through this ridiculous situation. Come on!
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