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I think that is what you get if you hang out with someone you don't really like just because you can't think of anything better to do. Now that you have better things to do you want to tell her why she isn't fun to be around?
I guess what I would do is screen my phone calls. We all know with cell phones whose calling now so it makes that easy. Just don't pick up very often when she calls. She may give up and move on to someone else. Another thing to do would be to invite her if you're having a big BBQ or something so everyone can share the burden of listening to her. Good luck.
Unfortunatley this is what happens in places like FL where you live, you have mostly transplants and snowbirds who make "fast friends" beause everyone is from some place else. I saw this with my parents who retired to FL. Everyone is very chummy as long as there is no bumps in the road. Once somene gets ill or needs a ride, they're in the wind.
I disagree. We take care of each other in my condo association. We always make sure someone can get where they have to go. If they can't get out we do their shopping for them. We check on certain ones everyday. For some the help is temporary but for others it has been going on for quite awhile. One even talks way too much.
No matter how much tact you use to tell her she's a Chatty Cathy, odds are it won't sink in.
Or she may get really offended and go around telling people you're a jerk who was very mean to her.
We have a gal in our complex who, although not a mean person, has a very smothering personality. If you do one thing with her, or take one phone call, she'll hound you to death. It goes a lot further, but I think you the picture.
I tried a one-on-one talk with her about me being more of a private person and not much of a gadabout, etc., and she really thanked me and said she was so glad I said something. Yeah, right. She was okay for about a week, then it started up again. Now I just avoid her at all costs. If she calls I don't answer; if she leaves a voice message with a question for me I answer it the next day or so in text format.
With some folks you just have to keep them at a distance.
I avoid hurting feelings - I don't think I avoid conflict. I told her the other day when we talked that my schedule has changed from what it was when she was here in the spring and that I hope she isn't expecting me to spend as much time with her. That is the truth.
BTW, no she doesn't live with me thank goodness. She owns a condo a few buildings down.
As far as the poster who said just tell her how hard it is to have a conversation with her and ask if anybody has ever told her this I think that is an excellent idea. Don't know if she will come to an epiphany about why she has so few friends but it's worth a shot.
I agree, it's worth a shot. She's probably very nice. My guy is a talker. He knows it. Your friend probably knows it, too. My guy gets his feelings hurt but I can be reasonable and start with "Please don't take this the wrong way" or "I'd never want to hurt your feelings, I do care about you, BUT..." She might take it wrong but after a little while, your words will sink in, maybe after she's back at her place. She will remember your kindness and your gentle words and she will get it. I think you're a good friend for giving it a shot!
So much good advice. Depending on you and if you really want to develop a friendship is what should be the deciding factor.
She shouldn't be hard to avoid if she is buildings away. You can emphasize in text how busy you are now, and you'll let her know
by text if you have time to meet her and where during her time there. That should be a good hint.
I see you've met my mother. Canadian, hates winter, will talk your ear off.
Jokes aside, maybe just be honest with her. Tell her you really enjoy her company, but it's OK to not be chatty every second. Either she'll then be aware and tone it down, or she'll get into a huff and never speak to you again.
I avoid hurting feelings - I don't think I avoid conflict. I told her the other day when we talked that my schedule has changed from what it was when she was here in the spring and that I hope she isn't expecting me to spend as much time with her. That is the truth.
You said: Her constant talking is just too much for me.
I think that's the real truth.
I think you don't want to spend any time with her at all but you pride yourself on being "nice" -- which is another way of making sure that no one ever gets mad at you.
be polite and friendly if you see her and be very busy, no reason to tell someone they are too talkative, unless you are backed into a corner. tell the ladies at the barn to bring a book or an ipod and earphones.
I would call her before she comes down and explain the problem with her tell her she just talks too much as easy as you can. Maybe she doesn't realize what she is doing. My ex-wife was like this it got worse as she got older it was ADHD she got medication and stopped doing it. Her constantly talking was how she revealed anxiety . I googled searched here is a video talks about the issue with ADHD. If your able to talk to her about it maybe she can get some help. Life with ADHD - Help! I Can
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