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I have an adult son who refuses to hear me out about how his fiance treats his 3 yr old daughter... he doesn't see it so it can't be true.
She is mean to her, just this side of abusive, the law refuses to do anything about it.
He got engaged to this thing called a woman when she got pregnant now he has this second child she treats like glass... please help, any suggestions?
OP, you say your soon to be daughter-in-law mistreats your son's child. Is there physical abuse? I'm a CPS worker and under the law, if there is any abuse or neglect, it has to be investigated.
Does this precious child know her soon-to-be step-mother doesn't like her (or realize the lady is "mean" to her)? I know she's only 3, but I'm not sure of the extent of the mistreatment. I would tell the son one more time the concerns, encourage open communications between father and daughter, and just keep loving and empowering the child.
Does your son have full custody of his first child?
there is only so much you can do, if you want to stay in your son and his family's life. Some women can be very accepting of children who are not their own, but if the step childs mother is still in the picture, it can be hard to treat a child like your own.
speak about this with your son, in a way that is not insulting or offensive, like pointing fingers and speculating . There are your rules and their rules, and they will go by their rules.
The most you can do is remind your son that children need all the fun and love they can get, even from MILs. the worst thing you can do is interrogate the child, or dictate how your Sons wife does things. Depending how you handle this situation, you can alienate your relationship with your son, or ruin his relationship meddling too much in his life. Unless you see bruises, or personally witness some harsh treatment by you DIL, be very careful what you say to her.
So what if your DIL treats her newborn baby with so much love an attention. It is Her child is it not?
I empathize with you.
I persistently planted seeds when addressing legitimate concerns. It was a six year battle. The saying ...Silence breeds consent is sadly one people practice...
I suggest remaining vigilant in your concerns. More kids need a less bias person speaking on their behalf.
I'm not saying to stir the pot...Just keep your comments or concerns limited.
I have an adult son who refuses to hear me out about how his fiance treats his 3 yr old daughter... he doesn't see it so it can't be true.
She is mean to her, just this side of abusive, the law refuses to do anything about it.
He got engaged to this thing called a woman when she got pregnant now he has this second child she treats like glass... please help, any suggestions?
If you are seeing these events...record them and show it to him and CPS. If you are not seeing them I must ask how you know?
My ex husband's second wife was horrible to my son when he was little. It started as neglectful and became physically and emotionally abusive. As his mother, I had a responsibility to my child to keep him safe. I told my husband I would not tolerate her treating my son that way and told him that any time he had to work on his weekends to have my son, I would not allow my son to go. The abuse was taking place when my ex was working and my son was alone with his wife. I also told him that if I caught wind of one more emotional or physically abusive event, I would be contacting CPS and removing his visitation rights completely. She was an evil woman. He was a spineless wimp who allowed her to do whatever she wanted.
My son is now 29 years old and has nothing to do with his bio father.
You need to let the bio mother know (if she's involved in this child's life).
You better be cocksure before reporting her to any authority. We're talking video evidence. Otherwise, you'll never see your son or grandchild again.
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