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So, I have not been on for a while, as we moved from Maine to Aberdeen. I don't dislike the area here, but it's just not for us. Work for my husband is okay, but could definitely be better. My daughter is doing well in school, gradewise, but making friends has been difficult. There isn't much time to get from class to class, the classes she got stuck in coming in late are a bit crazy, she has seen multiple fights and even saw one of the kids get tazed. She has been asked to many parties, but that's not her thing, she has no desire to go out and get drunk or stoned (Thank God). Most of the clubs or classes she really likes are full. The school is too full, at least 30 students per class. She loves the arts and theater and nature. I have met a few people, but it's just not that small town feel. I never see the same person twice at the stores. I like having the amenities, shopping and dining, but I'd be okay if they were 10 or 15 minutes away too. So, I guess what I'm looking for is a small and low crime town, where I can have a yard and parks and it would be great if there was something nearby for teens. And obviously work for my husband who is a self employed carpenter and handyman. My work is mostly online, but I do make Christmas wreaths and I certainly missed doing that this past year. I also paint signs and hand paint slates, saw blades and canvas along with dried floral and burlap decor. I keep busy. �� my husband is also a very good woodworker, and has built several cabinets, hutches, vanities, etc. He even built me my own shop in Maine, insulated and heated! I'm hoping what I'm looking for is in NC. Oh, and lakes or swimming areas. Most lakes or pools here come with hefty fees. I guess I'm just a country girl at heart.
So, I have not been on for a while, as we moved from Maine to Aberdeen. I don't dislike the area here, but it's just not for us. Work for my husband is okay, but could definitely be better. My daughter is doing well in school, gradewise, but making friends has been difficult. There isn't much time to get from class to class, the classes she got stuck in coming in late are a bit crazy, she has seen multiple fights and even saw one of the kids get tazed. She has been asked to many parties, but that's not her thing, she has no desire to go out and get drunk or stoned (Thank God). Most of the clubs or classes she really likes are full. The school is too full, at least 30 students per class. She loves the arts and theater and nature. I have met a few people, but it's just not that small town feel. I never see the same person twice at the stores. I like having the amenities, shopping and dining, but I'd be okay if they were 10 or 15 minutes away too. So, I guess what I'm looking for is a small and low crime town, where I can have a yard and parks and it would be great if there was something nearby for teens. And obviously work for my husband who is a self employed carpenter and handyman. My work is mostly online, but I do make Christmas wreaths and I certainly missed doing that this past year. I also paint signs and hand paint slates, saw blades and canvas along with dried floral and burlap decor. I keep busy. �� my husband is also a very good woodworker, and has built several cabinets, hutches, vanities, etc. He even built me my own shop in Maine, insulated and heated! I'm hoping what I'm looking for is in NC. Oh, and lakes or swimming areas. Most lakes or pools here come with hefty fees. I guess I'm just a country girl at heart.
Every public high school school in NC is going to have about 30 students per class.
Aberdeen IS a small town. I'm not sure if what you're looking for really exists. I think I recommended you look at the Southport area in a previous thread. It may an option.
So, I have not been on for a while, as we moved from Maine to Aberdeen. I don't dislike the area here, but it's just not for us. ..... Oh, and lakes or swimming areas. Most lakes or pools here come with hefty fees.
So you are looking for a better alternative to Aberdeen, but still have a very limited budget. I'd suggest going back to the suggestions you received the first time around.
Lake swimming areas are not going to be free in North Carolina, althought the ocean beaches are free. You might try White Lake which is about a 75 mile drive from Aberdeen. My husband's family went thre when they were kids in Sanford.
Regarding your daughter's inability to find friends, one reason will be that she did not grow up in Aberdeen with other girls her age. I'd give it some more time. If she is seriously unhappy, go through the school guidance department to find her counselling.
So you are looking for a better alternative to Aberdeen, but still have a very limited budget. I'd suggest going back to the suggestions you received the first time around.
Lake swimming areas are not going to be free in North Carolina, althought the ocean beaches are free. You might try White Lake which is about a 75 mile drive from Aberdeen. My husband's family went thre when they were kids in Sanford.
Regarding your daughter's inability to find friends, one reason will be that she did not grow up in Aberdeen with other girls her age. I'd give it some more time. If she is seriously unhappy, go through the school guidance department to find her counselling.
i know white lake very well, it doesn't have the kind of family vacation destination stuff some older folks may remember -- it's going to feel more rural and out there than aberdeen... Also they don't do a good job providing public lake access. There is one neighborhood I would consider decent for lake access even though your home may be off lake
But looking around the bay lakes is a good idea! There is big waccamaw, or the bay tree lake gated community, others...
But that'll be even more rural living. Which is great if you know what to expect.
Maybe Benson would be your speed? Country but close enough to Garner and Raleigh for teen activities. My daughter attends West Johnston and likes it. She has yet to see a fight this year. She is in 9th grade and so far we are impressed.
[quote=goldenage1;42777911]So you are looking for a better alternative to Aberdeen, but still have a very limited budget. I'd suggest going back to the suggestions you received the first time around.
Lake swimming areas are not going to be free in North Carolina, althought the ocean beaches are free. You might try White Lake which is about a 75 mile drive from Aberdeen. My husband's family went thre when they were kids in Sanford.
Regarding your daughter's inability to find friends, one reason will be that she did not grow up in Aberdeen with other girls her age. I'd give it some more time. If she is seriously unhappy, go through the school guidance department to find her counselling.[/QUOTE
@goldenage1, I guess I am used to being able to drive to the local lake for swimming in the summer. I am looking for something that is in between where I lived and here. I have noticed that there a several lake areas in the western part of the state that are public. And that may be where we will head to. Also have found a few jobs listed out towards Hendersonville area and Asheville. I just cannot imagine driving 75 miles to a lake in the middle of the summer.
As far as limited budget, we are paying a pretty steep rent payment right now, and we are handling it fine. We made sure we had saved a good amount of money before taking this step. And my husband does have income coming in. And we have already spoken with mortgage companies for when we are ready. I think for now we will stick to renting to make sure we are where we want to be. That's why we chose to rent here. And I am glad we did. Our lease isn't up til summer, so we have time to look around and check out specific areas.
I don't think the issue in the school is that my daughter didn't grow up here...the majority of kids at the school are not from here. It is a hard school to meet people. They have no mingle time really to speak of. The bell rings pretty much right after she gets to school (she takes the bus), and they have only a couple of minutes to get from class to class, and with 2600 kids in the hallways, they don't have time to spare. If they don't get to the class on time, they get locked out. Evidently, that's a thing....locking the classroom doors. At the end of the day, it's time to get to the bus. She has friends in school, but they are classmates really...and a lot of partying. She isn't into that....she has a focus. Her grades are great, no complaints there. She gets her work done before most of the other students. She has already learned much of what they are teaching her. There are a lot of fights in the school, kids being tazed, and teachers that are completely stressed out, that they eventually give up. For instance, my daughter had an essay to do...from start to finish in steps. She was done with it before anyone else. But they never finished that assignment because the teacher just gave up cause not many were doing he work. It's the only essay she had to write all semester. Home school, she had at least two essays going all the time.
My daughter isn't in need of counseling. She knows what she wants in life, she has a good head on her shoulders, she is independent, and she doesn't put up with anyone's crap. She has other students come to her when they are having problems, she seems to be the problem solver....but it never goes beyond that. There isn't really anything in the area for teens to do. And I have heard that complaint from many others.
I'm not saying the area is awful...it's just not for us. We like a little more country, a little more nature, parks and art.
But thanks for the advice, I do appreciate anything that anyone has to offer.
To me it sounds like you are looking for an idealized small town experience that doesn't really match your family's needs.
Small rural towns have small rural people. Drug use and partying on the weekends is what small town kids do. Financial support for school activities can be limited. The number of college bound kids can be smaller. Regardless of the school...moving after elementary school is hard on families. The elementary school was the center of my old town, but once kids have moved on, it is much harder to connect with other parents. I've really had to work at that.
Small town people have known each other forever, so they might be 'friendly' but they don't really need new friends. Your husband needs access to jobs And it sounds like your crafty interests haven't enabled you to connect with people.
I think you need to be more specific in your search.
Look for craft guilds, (and places to sell your wares, where better to connect with other like minded people?) parks and rec. departments with better swimming options, communities that provide after school activities your daughter likes. If there is not a local theater, what is the point?
I searched the internet and made a google map of very specific resources for my family. Then I started zeroing in on communities that met those needs. It was a lot of work, but worth it. I am living over my budget, but it is temporary...when my daughter graduates, I can make other choices for myself.
Yes, public swimming at White Lake is not encouraged. Many state parks in NC have great swimming areas, and also some county parks.
To me it sounds like you are looking for an idealized small town experience that doesn't really match your family's needs. ....
Yes, public swimming at White Lake is not encouraged. Many state parks in NC have great swimming areas, and also some county parks.
These comments are spot-on. I hope this helps the OP.
And yes, people would drive 75 miles to take the family swimming for a day. Adjust to that! We do not have all the glacial lakes that Maine does. (We also do not have Maine winters.)
BTW, Aberdeen has grown 103 percent since 2000. It sounds like the growth has out-stripped the capacity of the schools to handle it. There is a lot of growth all over North Carolina. But, I would feel terrible if kids were being tazed to control fights in the schools, and there must be other towns where this is not happening.
goldstons beach is not what it was and most of the folks swimming there would be super low on the socio economic spectrum......no judgment calls.... it is just definitely not a 'suburban mom' vibe when it gets busy. If I was looking at white lake I was gonna suggest turtle cove or waterford as neighborhoods with walk to the lake public access. Though Waterford is much better public access IMO
i love white lake...i grew up there...i think it's very special and lots of folks have fond memories... It was also special as offering a sort of blue collar resort experience and still does that in some regards but I think sadly its transitioning to like a gated lake with grotesque mcmansions gobbling up all the waterfront what was once small houses and summer trailers and summer rentals. It's also very poorly positioned to job centers.
i love white lake...i grew up there...i think it's very special and lots of folks have fond memories... It was also special as offering a sort of blue collar resort experience
Thank you for your perspective. That was also my husband's memory of White Lake.
I was not seriously offering it to the OP as a place to live. The OP needs to get over her nostalgia for some aspects of small-town Maine if she wants to adjust to North Carolina. Perhaps the family really should head towards Hendersonville for an experience closer to their ideal.
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