Are people really materialistic around NoVA? (North Shore: condo, high income, live)

[normie]

RR, sounds like we have an obvious solution here. Contact RVA and move into her apartment building. You won't have to deal with materialism because everyone there makes their own clothes. Everyone in the building is already friends with each other, so you'll get to know your neighbor. It'll be like living in the Broadway production of Rent. Or maybe the tv show Friends. I can see the appeal of a place like that, especially in your 20s. And Richmond has lots of old buildings, lots of character, lots of history--perfect fit for you. Why not ask DCAA if you can transfer there?

[Denton56]

Originally Posted by normie

RR, sounds like we have an obvious solution here. Contact RVA and move into her apartment building. You won't have to deal with materialism because everyone there makes their own clothes. Everyone in the building is already friends with each other, so you'll get to know your neighbor. It'll be like living in the Broadway production of Rent. Or maybe the tv show Friends. I can see the appeal of a place like that, especially in your 20s. And Richmond has lots of old buildings, lots of character, lots of history--perfect fit for you. Why not ask DCAA if you can transfer there?

Another great post, Normie!

[Denton56]

Originally Posted by RestonRunner86

Transient is an understatement. My upstairs neighbors moved out in a rush yesterday and never even said good-bye. I'm moving out soon as well and likewise have no plans to say sayonara. I believe my next-door neighbor is moving as well. I can see why it's so easy to say there's no sense of community here when everyone is so mobile.

Duh. You live in a rental apartment building. Of course there's lots of turnover. Young people rent apartments. They move to other locations, they get married, they buy houses. When you buy a house you will see how many people live in the same houses for decades. No one lives in a rental apartment for decades!

[Denton56]

Originally Posted by Workin_Hard

Is it materialistic to lives within one's means, even if those means are higher than that of others? We live within our available budget, are able to consistently pay our bills, and rarely go out to eat. We buy our clothes at Potomac Mills, Kohl's, etc., and our food at Costco, Wegman's, Harris Teeter. Our daughter is in private preschool which actually is only slightly higher than many daycare options. Our house is 5000 sq. ft., we have a paid-for SUV with 150K miles which is running just fine and a new Lexus hybrid. Books come from the library and I cut my own grass. Our credit cards are at a zero balance and a recently refinanced mortgage is the only significant debt (although I pay less in mortgage than many pay in renting a 2 bedroom apartment).

Is the judgement of "too materialistic" relative? If it's all about money, even Bill Gates picked up the morning paper recently and learned that maybe he's not the richest guy anymore.

So who sets the 'standard' we should live by?

THANK YOU! AWESOME POST!!!

We are the same. We live in a big house after saving for a lifetime. I drive a BMW because it's the most fun car I've ever driven. I totally love it. We have NO debt, pay off credit cards every month. The only bill we have is a mortgage that we could pay off tomorrow but the interest rate is so low we can make more by investing our savings. We owe nothing to anyone and live where we do, and as we do, because we've worked hard, and saved hard. We choose to live like this because it makes us happy! We couldn't care less if anyone is impressed, or unimpressed. That's NEVER the point. Enjoying our lives is the point, and that's exactly what we're doing. I have ZERO desire to try please the envious or those who say we are ''materalistic''. We don't care what they think. Why would we? I have no idea why they spend so much time concerned about people who live as we do. Why would they care? Life's too short to be so resentful of others. As you say, there will always be someone who has more. So what?! Live as you choose to live, and enjoy your life. Resentment and envy only hurts those who harbor those feelings. They need to stop judging others and let the resentment go.

Anyway, thanks for your great post and thanks for saying it so well!

[Denton56]

Originally Posted by Workin_Hard

Is it materialistic to lives within one's means, even if those means are higher than that of others? We live within our available budget, are able to consistently pay our bills, and rarely go out to eat. We buy our clothes at Potomac Mills, Kohl's, etc., and our food at Costco, Wegman's, Harris Teeter. Our daughter is in private preschool which actually is only slightly higher than many daycare options. Our house is 5000 sq. ft., we have a paid-for SUV with 150K miles which is running just fine and a new Lexus hybrid. Books come from the library and I cut my own grass. Our credit cards are at a zero balance and a recently refinanced mortgage is the only significant debt (although I pay less in mortgage than many pay in renting a 2 bedroom apartment).

Is the judgement of "too materialistic" relative? If it's all about money, even Bill Gates picked up the morning paper recently and learned that maybe he's not the richest guy anymore.

So who sets the 'standard' we should live by?

Looks like your rep points are soaring! As they should be! Add mine to them!

[Denton56]

Originally Posted by RestonRunner86

Well at least this thread has convinced me thoroughly that this is not a place I want to plant down my roots in.

Because so many disagree with your views on materialism? Even nice Normie? You might be happier in a poorer area where you can go back to feeling rich, since that seems to be very important to you. When you get a bit older you will release that most people do what they do because it's what they want to do, with no thought to impressing anyone.

"You wouldn't care so much about what other people think of you, if you knew how seldom they did". Everyone's just living their lives, buying what they want to buy, with no thought about envy that might be generated in someone else's life. Only you can control your own feelings. No one else is responsible for how you feel. If seeing richer people bothers you, only you can change that, either by never again seeing people with more money than you have by living in a poor area, or by losing those envious feelings and just live your life without judging everyone around you. You'll be much happier when you can do that.

[The Dissenter]

Originally Posted by Denton56

Because so many disagree with your views on materialism? Even nice Normie? You might be happier in a poorer area where you can go back to feeling rich, since that seems to be very important to you. When you get a bit older you will release that most people do what they do because it's what they want to do, with no thought to impressing anyone.

"You wouldn't care so much about what other people think of you, if you knew how seldom they did". Everyone's just living their lives, buying what they want to buy, with no thought about envy that might be generated in someone else's life. Only you can control your own feelings. No one else is responsible for how you feel. If seeing richer people bothers you, only you can change that, either by never again seeing people with more money than you have by living in a poor area, or by losing those envious feelings and just live your life without judging everyone around you. You'll be much happier when you can do that.

I think it is this kind of defense of materialism that is proving RR's, RVA's, and my points.

[ngadude]

Originally Posted by Alanboy395

I think it is this kind of defense of materialism that is proving RR's, RVA's, and my points.

It seems though you 3 are in the minority opinion here on this topic. Most people here just seem to think people are going about their lives, and honestly don't care what those around them think about what kind of car they drive, or what other manifestations of wealth they show in public. This kind of goes against the theory that they are trying to flaunt their wealth and impress people less well off than they are. Or should these people have to hide their wealth and drive around cheap cars in public so as not to offend the sensibilities of those around them less well off than they are? It just doesn't make sense to me. I don't drive a fancy car, but it doesn't bother me at all when I see Mercedes, BMW's, etc. on the road. Well, someone driving a Hummer does bug me - as I just think that's a ridiculous gas guzzling thing to be driving on the road - if you have that kind of money there's a lot better cars you could buy for the same price. I'm amazed at the number of Hummers I see around here - I see one at least once a week on my commute to work. Of course, the Hummer is being discontinued, so people won't be able to buy them anymore. But otherwise, I just figure they bought that car because they like it and it makes them happy. This assigning an ulterior motive that they bought it to "show off" or "impress others so they give them more respect" just doesn't make any sense. And, it very much seems to be the minority opinion here.

[RVA-Jsn20]

Lol you'll never convince me that people don't care what other people think. that's a pretty ridiculous claim in my opinion. humans are very social animals, afterall

to me, (and RR/alanboy i'm sure) - you just sound defensive

[ngadude]

Originally Posted by RVA-Jsn20

Lol you'll never convince me that people don't care what other people think. that's a pretty ridiculous claim in my opinion. humans are very social animals, afterall

to me, (and RR/alanboy i'm sure) - you just sound defensive

And to the rest of us - you just sound resentful and that you care too much about what you see others do around you.

So, it works both ways! Not that I care, no one can accuse me of driving around in a fancy car or otherwise doing anything that would stand out from the crowd. And, I could care less about those who do show signs of obvious wealth. So, you're claim about me being defensive obviously is way off.